Good of time as any.
I don't update very often on here anymore cause I have come to grips with alot of my emotions. This being an emotional crutch for me I done away with it, but tonight is an exception cause I feel as if I have to share some things.
In recent months I went from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows. I've come to alot of realizations as of late that have left me feeling better about myself and those very few I trust with my emotions around me. I look back at how I acted in high school up until a few months ago was'nt very productive. I was an angry bitter person, which lead me to hide my feelings and react in such a sarcastic way people think im a horrible person or dislike me upon meeting me. I still have my personality intact thankfully just not as harsh. I don't hide many things anymore. What you see is what you get.
I've also came to grips with what I view as religion. I was raised catholic all my life, I never read much of the bible but I was taught in religion classes what was contained within. I believe now you don't have to rely on putting your faith in something thats not going to make you a better person. People go to church or say I believe in god, but hardly anyone lives to better themselves or live a good life. They'll be the type of people that will step on you and take you for granted and stab you over and over again if you let them.
I'll live by my own thoughts and opinions and what I do effects me. I'll end this paragraph with a quote from Remembering Never "The sudden guilt you carry, will not asure your place in heaven" I'd like to put more, cause this is an endless discussion, but I just put the one thing here that most people could relate to cause it effects everyone.
Some people never cease to amaze me. Seriously. Girls for one are just attention whores. Whenever a guy says something nice to a girl no matter how small they will think thats just the best thing they've ever heard. A homeless guy with one arm could comment on how good a girl would look on a certain day and they would think....survey says???!?!? That "He's a sweet guy" Don't believe me? just take a look at a few females around you.
In recent days i've reconnected with a good friend who I thought i'd never talk to again. It has been like the past 5 months did'nt happen. That's happened a few times this year but it was different this time around. Things got cleared up. Grudges let go. It makes me feel really good. Upon all the bad things I look back at times like these and really do smile. I have to have bad times in order to make the good times feel great. This just goes to show me the few friends I do have mean the world to me. So thank you to Chris, Andy, Ryan and Jeff for making me feel better whenever I needed you the most.
Call this a rant or a cry for a help or a one sided view on religion and girls, but you know what? I don't care. This is where im at. This is what has made me feel right. If you read this far then you DO care, or just have nothing better to do.
Much love-
Nick
In recent months I went from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows. I've come to alot of realizations as of late that have left me feeling better about myself and those very few I trust with my emotions around me. I look back at how I acted in high school up until a few months ago was'nt very productive. I was an angry bitter person, which lead me to hide my feelings and react in such a sarcastic way people think im a horrible person or dislike me upon meeting me. I still have my personality intact thankfully just not as harsh. I don't hide many things anymore. What you see is what you get.
I've also came to grips with what I view as religion. I was raised catholic all my life, I never read much of the bible but I was taught in religion classes what was contained within. I believe now you don't have to rely on putting your faith in something thats not going to make you a better person. People go to church or say I believe in god, but hardly anyone lives to better themselves or live a good life. They'll be the type of people that will step on you and take you for granted and stab you over and over again if you let them.
I'll live by my own thoughts and opinions and what I do effects me. I'll end this paragraph with a quote from Remembering Never "The sudden guilt you carry, will not asure your place in heaven" I'd like to put more, cause this is an endless discussion, but I just put the one thing here that most people could relate to cause it effects everyone.
Some people never cease to amaze me. Seriously. Girls for one are just attention whores. Whenever a guy says something nice to a girl no matter how small they will think thats just the best thing they've ever heard. A homeless guy with one arm could comment on how good a girl would look on a certain day and they would think....survey says???!?!? That "He's a sweet guy" Don't believe me? just take a look at a few females around you.
In recent days i've reconnected with a good friend who I thought i'd never talk to again. It has been like the past 5 months did'nt happen. That's happened a few times this year but it was different this time around. Things got cleared up. Grudges let go. It makes me feel really good. Upon all the bad things I look back at times like these and really do smile. I have to have bad times in order to make the good times feel great. This just goes to show me the few friends I do have mean the world to me. So thank you to Chris, Andy, Ryan and Jeff for making me feel better whenever I needed you the most.
Call this a rant or a cry for a help or a one sided view on religion and girls, but you know what? I don't care. This is where im at. This is what has made me feel right. If you read this far then you DO care, or just have nothing better to do.
Much love-
Nick