Here's a welcome back
Well I slowly have crawled my way back to live journal. It's been a while since I was even in the mood to write, but now I can't seem to get enough of it. I've written pages and pages of nothing for the past few days. I just can't seem to get a solid grip on what is bothering me all the time. Now I know all of my friends know that I have problems. I know that all of my friends think that on some level (at least) that I am pathetic. No one ever comes out and says what they really think, which I think is half the problem of this world. Some people get the language that is not spoken, and others (Like myself) seem to overlook the small things that would help us live life as normal people.
I met a girl named Ananda at a bar about a week or so ago. We have been out together a few times, and she has stayed the night here with no sex (which I am proud of). I really like this girl, but I can't shake the feeling that I just don't have what it takes to keep her around. We were supposed to see each other today, but she hasn't called yet and I'm worried. Mabye I've called her too much... mabye I said something that annoyed her, or pissed her off. But, like many other people, she refuses to speak her mind and say, "Hey... that was completely assinine!" That would save me so much trouble. I don't make a fool of myself all that often, but when it happens, it happens majorly and there really is no way to recover.
Outside of all of that, I have decided to remain male. It simply takes too much effort to change one's entire life and existence for an idea stuck in the brain. Thus why I am back to live journal. The girl thing is a load of crap that I just need to forget. "Like a diet of the mind, I choose simply not to indulge certain habits." -- John Nash I just have to move on.
I really can't think of more to say right now. Life is improving slowly and surely, but I still have no Idea where I am going to be in a year. I hope I will be right here with a wad of cash in my pocket and a girl at my side. Hmm... we'll see.
Sincerely,
Shawn
I met a girl named Ananda at a bar about a week or so ago. We have been out together a few times, and she has stayed the night here with no sex (which I am proud of). I really like this girl, but I can't shake the feeling that I just don't have what it takes to keep her around. We were supposed to see each other today, but she hasn't called yet and I'm worried. Mabye I've called her too much... mabye I said something that annoyed her, or pissed her off. But, like many other people, she refuses to speak her mind and say, "Hey... that was completely assinine!" That would save me so much trouble. I don't make a fool of myself all that often, but when it happens, it happens majorly and there really is no way to recover.
Outside of all of that, I have decided to remain male. It simply takes too much effort to change one's entire life and existence for an idea stuck in the brain. Thus why I am back to live journal. The girl thing is a load of crap that I just need to forget. "Like a diet of the mind, I choose simply not to indulge certain habits." -- John Nash I just have to move on.
I really can't think of more to say right now. Life is improving slowly and surely, but I still have no Idea where I am going to be in a year. I hope I will be right here with a wad of cash in my pocket and a girl at my side. Hmm... we'll see.
Sincerely,
Shawn