"and i'm tangled up in you"
I don't know why things hit me at the worst times but they do and that leaves me in the state of being an emotional disaster right now. it's not even like i'm sad to leave feehan, i'm scared to leave everything. i'm scared of what will happen in the next couple of months. i anticipate so much, but want everything to stay the same. i know it can't, and i truly don't want it to but when you come to find your comfort zone its tough to find the courage to leave it all behind. A lot of things are going to change and I have to come to terms with all of it. I'm beginning to let new people into my life and I'm afraid that by letting them in; I'm setting myself up to get hurt. That's how I am. I don't let people in because I feel like they'll just hurt me in the end. So yes, at times I may seem like I'm just a bitter girl who is content with having 3 close friends but in all reality... I'm scared. And I can't believe I'm admitting this to a livejournal. The one thing I hate using, is now getting everything on my mind. Thursday is coming wayy too fast. Go away! I can't handle this saying goodbye thing. Actually I don't think I can handle anything right now. Awards ceremony as boring as it was and as much as I loved making predictions on who won EVERY single award; it hits you. This is it guys, this is the end of our time at Feehan. This my friends, is that whole thing we've been warned against, it's what they call growing up. I don't know if any of us are truly ready for it but I guess we'll find out sooner or later.