Indecipherable (Community fic)

Jun 24, 2012 23:48

Title: Indecipherable (1/?)
Author: sinecure - My master fic list
Character/Pairing: Jeff/Annie
Rating: PG (for now)
Word Count: 2,454
Genre: Romance, angst
Spoilers: Season 3 to be safe.
Summary: After Shirley's wedding, Annie seeks out Jeff, who, as we all know, drowned his sorrows quite thoroughly.
Disclaimer: I don't own Community and I make no money off of it.
A/N: This was written from teruel_a_witch's comments in the episode thread for Urban Matrimony and the Sandwich Arts:
I'd really love a post-ep follow up/missing scene/canon compliant thing, with Jeff and Annie's POV on some moments during the ep and after. Annie teasing Jeff about nearly getting married, and a sweet moment of her somehow comforting him because she knows the reason behind his marriage-beliefs, something in that vein. atmilady_milord. It turned out a little different though.
A/N: This was written just after the episode and I'm anal enough to point that out for reasons that should be obvious after I say 'I did it before the show, damn it!' and then you read the fic.


"So, how does it feel to be almost-married again?"

Jeff didn't bother glancing up at Annie's cheerful question. His head hurt, his body ached, and he wasn't quite sure why on that last part. Were lace and flowers involved? Maybe Leonard? "Sucky. And slightly like a hangover."

She sat next to him, the scent of her perfume making him nauseous and soothing him at the same time. It was what he'd dubbed The Dichotomy of Annie. She was young, but mature. Innocent, yet sophisticated and sometimes wicked. Gentle as a spring rain, but ready to nail his balls to the wall at a moment's notice.

He was... fond of her. As his current condition could attest to. "Crap." He swallowed hard, pushing down the feelings rushing to jump up and down until they were noticed.

He'd noticed them.

Obviously he'd noticed them.

Crap.

Her hand settled on his on the bench, warm in the cool, night air. "Jeff, are you okay? You... well, you said some things in there."

"'m fine." Talking about his issues and his hang-ups was not on the top of his list for, oh, ever being discussed. Some things weren't meant to be shared. Some things weren't meant to be known, even by him. "...fine," he repeated softly.

"It's okay to be afrai--"

He tossed her a glare.

"Wwww...orr...?"

He gave up with a short nod that sent his stomach reeling again.

Annie's renewed smile was sunshine and roses. "Worried about--"

He hated sunshine and roses right now.

"Annie." Nausea was beginning to rise in him again and it had nothing to do with the alcohol. Of all the people to discuss his relationship-slash-commitment-slash-marriage issues with, Annie was on the bottom of the list under Satan and the 'I like turtles' kid. Maybe switch those two.

"Jeff," she tossed back, unbothered by his warning tone. "I know you have a therapist, but if you ever need to talk to someone who's not getting paid to listen, I'm here. We all are."

He glanced around, looking for the others. A breeze shook the bare branches of the tree beside the bench they were on. Stars winked in the night sky. The moon shone bright behind Annie.

But no study group members.

Except Annie.

Which, again, was why he felt like he currently did, which was like crap that'd been run over twice and then smashed with a meat tenderizer. "Yay, study group."

She chuckled and settled back on the bench, carefully pulling her skirt down around her legs before smoothing out the material. "They're here for you too, but maybe starting after tonight? I think Britta was putting a flower vase on her head when I left, and Troy and Abed were climbing into the vents."

Head hanging low and held loosely in his hands, Jeff breathed in the night air. "Sounds like a fun time. Why did you leave?"

She shrugged, wrapping her hands around her upper arms. "You told Pierce to beat his Filet Mignon when he got home and then tried to teach Shirley's boys how to pick up women. And then you disappeared." She glanced his way with a small smile that wasn't too sunshine-y or rosey. It was just enough. "I was worried."

He shrugged out of his jacket, fighting to get his arms out of it, stopping to loosen his tie a little when it tried to choke him. Jacket half off, he unbuttoned the top button on his shirt with a relieved sigh. "Don't worry 'bout me. 'm fine."

"I can see that." She turned, helping him remove his jacket with quick, nimble fingers. "It's actually okay to ask for help sometimes."

She had warm fingers still, despite her chilliness.

Draping his jacket over her shoulders, he tried not to look into her big, blue Annie-eyes, but they were right there and grateful and melting just a little bit.

"Thank you." Her smile was definitely amped up to uber sunshine-y and rosey galore.

"You looked cold," he mumbled, straightening the lapel under her chin. His fingers brushed her skin again and it was like walking through a field of blossoms; a sharp aroma of flowers tickled his nose and mixed in was the scent of chocolate chip cookies. He stood up so fast that his head slammed around in his skull, making him reel a little until the pounding ceased. "I-- I should-- I need to go."

"Jeff?" She looked concerned again. Rising beside him, holding his jacket together with one hand, she reached out with the other. "What's wrong?"

What was he supposed to say; you smell like my favorite guilty pleasure, my biggest comfort food all rolled into one giant package of hot and sexy?

Even that was a partial lie.

"Nothing."

"Yeah, you're fine. Again. Still. Whatever. Look, Jeff. I know something's bothering you and if not me, then Britta. You should talk to her."

He stared at Annie like she'd grown a second, third, fourth, and fifth head. "Why would I want to do that? Have you seen some of her tactics? Edible complex? Really?"

Annie brushed that aside. "Edible, baggle, so what. She likes helping people and you need help."

"Liking helping people and being able to help people are two different things."

"Well, you obviously can't, or won't, talk to me."

"It... it's not that I don't want to, Annie."

"Liar. But that's okay." Her smile softened the accusation. "It's not like I tell you everything either."

"What? Why not?" Seriously, he was offended now? With a hangover the size of a large Winnebago, which was currently driving through his brain at breakneck speed? Priorities.

"Uh, because we don't... do that. I tell you a lot of things, but not all of everything ever. I need Britta and Shirley for some things--"

"Ah."

"No ah. I just need them for some talks. And I need Troy and Abed for other things. I can't just only talk to you."

He sighed and began the trek to his car with Annie walking beside him. "You could, but I understand why you don't." If it was the same reason he was keeping mum tonight, keeping secrets from her, then he would sleep happily for the rest of his life. But if it wasn't-- "Annie, you can talk to me about anything." He stopped to lean against a car. Not his, but he was worn out and still slightly nauseous.

"I know that, Jeff, but-- wait. Are we heading to your car? Do you expect me to let you drive in this condition?"

Chuckling, he took her hand and squeezed it for a brief moment before letting it go. "I expect you to offer to drive me home."

She twisted her mouth up, looking back over her shoulder at the only building lit up by twinkling lights and loud laughter. "I was going to--"

"Go back inside to watch Troy and Abed take back the Mantle of Odd? Fight Leonard over the last hors d'oeuvres? Maybe, if you're lucky, tackle Britta to the ground after she starts to sing Too Sexy to the dean and does her 'me so hungry' dance?" He pushed away from the car, feeling a tugging on his hand. He looked down to discover that he still had Annie's hand. He hadn't let it go.

Annie sighed and nodded with barely any hesitation. "I guess I could drive you home and then come back."

"Or you could stay."

Heart in his throat, he glanced her way, waiting for her response. It wasn't something they'd ever done before, just the two of them. As a group they'd had plenty of late nights together at one another's places, but not like this. Not one on one.

Holding his hand in both of her own, she played with his fingers as they walked, a small smile on her face. "If you want me to."

He stopped and turned, not sure what he was doing, but something in his chest was forcing him to be honest, to say what he needed to say. What he wanted to say. "I want you."

"To," she finished.

He shook his head, not looking away. "I want you."

The smile dropped from her face and she looked a little angry, which confused him. "You're drunk."

"I am. And I'll probably not be thrilled once I sober up, but I'm..." He sighed, eyes sliding to the ground as he considered his next words very carefully. "I'm being honest, Annie. I looked into my heart like you told me to do and what I saw there drove me to indulge in one of the other things that's also in there."

"You mean your parents, which is kind of a weird, and possibly gross, transition. Your childhood must've been tough."

He brushed that off with an absent gesture. "It-- yeah, but that wasn't what I meant. I..." He drew in a full breath and looked straight at her. "I saw you."

Her hand loosened around his and he tightened his grip, not wanting to let her go. "Well, of course you did. You're in my heart too. And Abed and Britta and everyone. It's nothing to be ashamed of. And see?" she said softly, teasingly, "I told you you cared."

"No. Well, yeah, I mean of course they're there. It goes without saying at this point, right?" He threaded his fingers into her hair, pressing a kiss to her forehead, not wanting to release her again. "But what I saw when you told me to look into my heart was you, Annie. Just you." He thought about that for a second. "And a dog."

"Oh, ew! Gross, Jeff, I'm not--"

"Jesus, Annie. Really? It's my old golden retriever, Burt and Ernie. He died when I was 6."

"Oh." Her eyes softened. "Oh, Jeff," she whispered, voice sympathetic and tender. "I'm sorry."

"Again, not the point; I was six. I just-- I'm trying to-- I think I love you, Annie. I think I am... wholly and completely in love with you. And it scares the fuck out of me."

She stared at him, unblinking.

Then she blinked once.

"I--"

He waited, letting her process his sudden attack of The Honestys. It happened so rarely that he'd probably shocked her through and through.

"You--"

And through.

"Take your time." He started to drop her hand, to give her room, but she clenched her fingers tighter, warm palm touching his in the cool night air.

Her eyes, losing the unfocused fuzziness that'd begun to seep in, found his. Bright blue and so big. So deep and indecipherable. He wanted to know them, to know her, to find out everything about Annie Edison and what made her tick because she baffled him and made him angry, turned him on and made him to want to scream. She was a mystery he'd put the effort into solving.

"Your dog's name was Burt and Ernie?"

Staring at her for a few seconds in incomprehensible puzzlement, he felt laughter rise in him. It left him in a rush at the confused curiosity on her face and dancing in her eyes. "I-- yeah. I thought it was all one word. BurtandErnie."

Her lips twitched and she fell into his chest, laughing. It was the most beautiful, reassuring sound he'd heard in a long time. "Jeff, that's..." More laughter interrupted her, but it was soft and sweet. She shook against him, arms trapped between them.

He wrapped his free arm around her--still holding tight to her hand with his--resting his cheek on her head, staring off into the bright, night sky. "I was six," he pointed out again, chuckling with her. She was warm and soft and she smelled like home.

Her laughter died down after a minute, but she stayed where she was. "Did you get drunk because of what you saw in here?" Her hand settled on his chest, just over his heart. Fingers pressing lightly, she lifted her head to look up at him. "Did I... do I scare you that much? Being in here?"

Startled out of his comfortable reverie, he thought about the best way to phrase it, because she had. She did. Instead, he sighed, looking away briefly before returning his gaze back to her. "I'm a coward."

"Or you're human," she countered, stepping out of his embrace, but keeping a firm hold on his hand. Warm palm, small fingers. He liked the fit. "You scare me, too, Jeff. I mean, I'm not--" She shrugged, shaking her head a little helplessly. "I'm not comfortable with--" Grunting in frustration, she shrugged her shoulders as if loosening up.

"It's okay, Annie. You don't have to say anything." It was a little scary and a lot disheartening, but he didn't expect her to just blurt out her feelings like he had. It was ridiculous and unrealistic to think she felt the same and could express that at the same time as him.

And disappointing.

She smiled her 'brave soldier' smile, though it shook a little and her eyes looked suspiciously close to tears. "I'm sorry." Her voice was barely above a whisper, her eyes so sincere that it took some of the pressure off of his chest. Loosened some of the tightness. "I care about you, too."

Ouch.

"You know, I think I'm okay to drive now." He released her hand, wanting to run from the expression creeping into her face; it was pity. He knew it was. "You should go back inside." Chuckling, though he'd never felt less like it, he gestured to the school. "Save Britta from the punchbowl, she's likely to take it as a challenge to chug it all down. I've seen it happen before."

"Jeff--"

"Abed and Troy are probably pelting the guests with rolled up balls of tissue paper by now, and Pierce has to be regaling Shirley's family with tales about his penis." He smiled and it was almost genuine. Their friends were... well, he wouldn't trade them for all the magic beans in the world, even ones that grew a stalk up to Stripper Land.

Though, maybe Annie Land....

Darting forward, he pressed a kiss to Annie's forehead, breathing her in for too short a time before pulling away again. "Goodnight, Annie."

"Jeff--" Her eyes were soft and sad, her head tilted to the side, fingers pulling at one another. "Don't do this, please."

It was clear in her voice that she thought he was in danger of doing something drastic, like closing his heart off to everything ever.

And he was.

But he smiled and gave a small wave anyway. "See you tomorrow."

sinecure: community, sinecure: community: indecipherable, sinecure

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