addendum
the use of the racial slur "nigger" in one of the las tposts was in no way a reflection of the way i think or feel about race or stereotypes of those races or the slurs, it is only a reflection of the way in which i was brought up, and the influences and the people around me. nigger rick was the real name of a real person who lived in the neighborhood. everyone called him this and he let them, he didnt seem to mind. and i guess what i am going to be trying to point out in my autobiographical account of growing up is that you get sucked into theses things, the seeming normality of them and the absurdity of it all.