Hair or Not
In the realm of nobody really cares I've been seriously contemplating a cutting of the hairs.
It's actually a bit longer at this point as that was taken 2 years ago.
I'm known for my hair. I love my hair. It's soft and pretty and shiny. I haven't cut it in 14 years.
But is this what I want my identity to be? I've joked many times about cutting it all off or shaving my head. But this is different. This is an idea that keeps coming back to me and flitting around my head. I know that I'm not my hair .. but after this long, how much of who I am perceived to be is directly related to my hair?
I know that I will be loved no matter then length of my hair. I know that Lynn will adore me must as much with hair or without. I also know he loves to wash it and brush it for me. I know Nox doesn't really care one way or the other though she is careful about stepping on it, unless she's trying to make a point.
I'm not even thinking of cutting all that much off. The thought that keeps coming back is waist length, or even just below my butt. I think and I think on it and it sounds more and more like an idea that I'd like. I could keep most of the length and it'd grow back fairly quickly but still be something a bit different.
And then I go an have a dream in which while I'm sleeping somebody comes by and cuts my hair off to where I'm thinking of it being cut and I'm furious in the dream because I wasn't ready.
Am I hiding behind my hair? Is it no longer me and I don't realize it? Am I just being silly and don't really want to cut it?
I just don't know anymore.
It's actually a bit longer at this point as that was taken 2 years ago.
I'm known for my hair. I love my hair. It's soft and pretty and shiny. I haven't cut it in 14 years.
But is this what I want my identity to be? I've joked many times about cutting it all off or shaving my head. But this is different. This is an idea that keeps coming back to me and flitting around my head. I know that I'm not my hair .. but after this long, how much of who I am perceived to be is directly related to my hair?
I know that I will be loved no matter then length of my hair. I know that Lynn will adore me must as much with hair or without. I also know he loves to wash it and brush it for me. I know Nox doesn't really care one way or the other though she is careful about stepping on it, unless she's trying to make a point.
I'm not even thinking of cutting all that much off. The thought that keeps coming back is waist length, or even just below my butt. I think and I think on it and it sounds more and more like an idea that I'd like. I could keep most of the length and it'd grow back fairly quickly but still be something a bit different.
And then I go an have a dream in which while I'm sleeping somebody comes by and cuts my hair off to where I'm thinking of it being cut and I'm furious in the dream because I wasn't ready.
Am I hiding behind my hair? Is it no longer me and I don't realize it? Am I just being silly and don't really want to cut it?
I just don't know anymore.