Live journal: revisited
Wow.
I had an urge to check out using live journal again, since I just need a place to write things. I can't believe I remembered my old user name and password for my live journal from like four years ago.. amazing. Also, funny to see my old postings about my pregnancy with Lorelai and remembering the events like yesterday.
Regardless,
I mostly decided to begin using this again to help with my weight loss journey. At this point in my life, I now weigh more than I did nine months pregnant with james, and almost as much as I did nine months pregnant with Lorelai, only I'm not pregnant. I'm not really sure why I am so fat, why I continue to sabotage myself, but maybe with this journal I can recover. I do know, a lot of times I use pregnancy as an excuse for my "cravings". I think oh I must be pregnant, so I thus allow myself to eat like a pig. I contracted this disease when we lived in the apartment trying to conceive James. It went away after James was born, until I had my miscarriage. I kept thinking what if I'm pregnant, what if I'm pregnant, I can eat this and it won't really matter blah blah blah. I have purchased some Slim Fast shakes to replace two meals with, as countless other diets have not helped. I am hoping that this will help me. I don't plan on making slim fast a permanent solution in my life, but I do think I need it to loose it least fifty pounds with. We will see.. they actually don't taste bad, unlike most vitamin and meal replacement shakes.
I measured myself today. My waist measured something like 47 inches. When I lived in El Paso my waist measured like 27 inches, or something really small like that. (Of course my butt was still large- but much smaller than before). My stomach was practically flat, and my arms only had a little flab. Oh how I dream of wearing my cute polos and tan pants again, with my nice black belt. Oh my! We will see. I will do some stretching tonight, and perhaps some weight exercises and squats, etc. Going to the gym just doing work for me, I must take it back to the basics. Hopefully, well, I should say, I KNOW with weight loss my back and knee problems will go away.
I really, really, want to be beautiful for my husband again. All this information I've been receiving lateley about people I know (who are chunky) and their partners want nothing to do with them until they lose weight again.. it just makes me so thankful for my husband. He is so kind to me, and always supportive. I love him! But damn, would I like to make him drool when I can fit into my purple corset again. ROFL =)
I'm cramping- grr. Tell mother nature to wait a few more days.
I had an urge to check out using live journal again, since I just need a place to write things. I can't believe I remembered my old user name and password for my live journal from like four years ago.. amazing. Also, funny to see my old postings about my pregnancy with Lorelai and remembering the events like yesterday.
Regardless,
I mostly decided to begin using this again to help with my weight loss journey. At this point in my life, I now weigh more than I did nine months pregnant with james, and almost as much as I did nine months pregnant with Lorelai, only I'm not pregnant. I'm not really sure why I am so fat, why I continue to sabotage myself, but maybe with this journal I can recover. I do know, a lot of times I use pregnancy as an excuse for my "cravings". I think oh I must be pregnant, so I thus allow myself to eat like a pig. I contracted this disease when we lived in the apartment trying to conceive James. It went away after James was born, until I had my miscarriage. I kept thinking what if I'm pregnant, what if I'm pregnant, I can eat this and it won't really matter blah blah blah. I have purchased some Slim Fast shakes to replace two meals with, as countless other diets have not helped. I am hoping that this will help me. I don't plan on making slim fast a permanent solution in my life, but I do think I need it to loose it least fifty pounds with. We will see.. they actually don't taste bad, unlike most vitamin and meal replacement shakes.
I measured myself today. My waist measured something like 47 inches. When I lived in El Paso my waist measured like 27 inches, or something really small like that. (Of course my butt was still large- but much smaller than before). My stomach was practically flat, and my arms only had a little flab. Oh how I dream of wearing my cute polos and tan pants again, with my nice black belt. Oh my! We will see. I will do some stretching tonight, and perhaps some weight exercises and squats, etc. Going to the gym just doing work for me, I must take it back to the basics. Hopefully, well, I should say, I KNOW with weight loss my back and knee problems will go away.
I really, really, want to be beautiful for my husband again. All this information I've been receiving lateley about people I know (who are chunky) and their partners want nothing to do with them until they lose weight again.. it just makes me so thankful for my husband. He is so kind to me, and always supportive. I love him! But damn, would I like to make him drool when I can fit into my purple corset again. ROFL =)
I'm cramping- grr. Tell mother nature to wait a few more days.