"He who makes a beast out of himself..gets rid of the pain of being a man..."
I no longer know what to do...I've tried to just get over it...I've tried hard. I want to just give up...go away. I can't take this pain in my heart. I guess I'm finally broken. I'm tired but can't sleep. I'm hungry but I have no appetite. I'm lonely...and have no one to love. I've always said...I wasn't dumb enough to commit suicide...but my thoughts always run back to it. I'm afraid..because I don't know when I'll reach my limit and I'm afraid that I'll go past my limit...and finally lose it along with everything, friends, family, and anybody who's ever cared. I feel like I'm just some pathetic shell, a shell that's being crushed under despair.