(no subject)

[shadowedsoul18]

ok so i said i was going to start updating this thing again and i seem to have never gotten around to it. haha ok lets start with i quit my job at town and country cuz my boss was an asshole so i only work at carbones now. school started....boy what drama...i tend to not really talk to any one this yr cept the select few cuz i dont want to have to deal with every1's drama storys ok....then this weekend equals sucky starting with friday. this kid knos i like him wich makes things awkward and i hate it and i want it all to go away. then friday we also had my brothers going away party...and i actually stayed sober. i mean i had a few sips but that doesnt count. but that party was fun...minus the one lil fight scene and a few broken things....otherwise tons of fun every1 was drunk....and my brothers friend was totally hitting on me....which was scarey. but i was able to have a meaningful converstation with two of the greatest guys in the world. they like look out for me and are like basically brothers 2 me. neways they opened my eyes to alot of things and made me want to be a better person and stop doing all the stupid stuff i do. then yesterday was sorta boring didnt do nething all day until i had work....which sucked cuz i was jus all ackey from the party and wrestling with shawn. then today jus sucked i had to get up and go into work at 9 and my brother left....and he like came in at 11 to get a sub and say by and the whole time i was making the sub i had tears in my eyes...and like when i gave to him i jus started cry and was like u shouldnt have come in here and hes like come out side. and he hugged me and was like dont cry its ok yah know stuff like that and then ryan came out to say by and i felt stupid cuz i was crying but at the same time i didnt care. and like it sucked cuz jeff left and like then i didnt want to be at work nemore i couldnt concentrate at all adn i kept making big mistakes and it was horrible. and ontop of that all i felt so freakin sick like i couldnt wait to get home. at least corey was nice to me fer once talkin to me and stuff about jeff adn what not...so thtat was nice i suppose. but frekain now that im home im like really realizing how sick i feel and its sucky ive fallen asleep twice while i was trying to finish my hw and like now i jus feel to crappy to even sleep. ugh i hate it. and then ontop of that all i feel all lonely and depressed and i dont like it one bit,

yep thats all for now im gonna go try and sleep seeing as i have school and work 2maro...ugh :(