I finally got the piccies from
Playland sorted out. *grin* What was probably the most fun about this was watching people watching *me* take the pictures. I got so many weird looks and double takes while I set these up - it was a real hoot. I even ran into one of the guys that came out and said 'hi' to us at the protest - he recognized me! I thought perhaps it was the vest with the Atlantis patch, but I'm thinking it was more likely he noticed the chick taking pictures of action figures, since I was doing the same thing in front of the studio...
Title: A Walk in the Park
Rating: VS for Very Silly
Pairing: More Sparky!
Genre: Action Figure Theater
Warnings: Leave your sanity at the door. I did mention silliness, yes?
Disclaimer: I deny everything. This could not possibly belong to me.
Summary: John drags everyone off to the amusement park. Wacky hijinks ensue. The usual.
This one is for
n7cdrsheppard and
ladyniko. Ladies, you know I live and breath McShep, but this is all yours. I hope you enjoy the Sparkage!
Action Figure Theater: A Walk in the Park
"This is it!"
Sheppard bounded up to the gate and purchased all of their tickets while Teyla and Elizabeth looked on, amused. He all but dragged them into the park.
John bounced on his toes.
"So! What do you think?" Sheppard asked with a grin.
Elizabeth thought that he looked something akin to a little boy on Christmas morning. Not that she would ever admit that out loud.
"Just the thing to relax and unwind!" he continued, gesturing all around them.
"I will gladly concede that this is a much better plan than your last one," she acknowledged with a smile.
Loud music and laughter from behind them caught Teyla's attention.
Teyla watched as people walked up a ramp onto a large round metal platform and were seated on the outer edge. A moment later a buzzer sounded. She took a step back, alarmed when lights began to flash and loud noise blared out while the platform began to spin and swing from side to side. She glanced up to see Sheppard grinning at her, and her eyes narrowed.
"Is it supposed to do that?" She inquired coolly.
He tried to put on an innocent air, and failed miserably. "Yep. It's the
Crazy Beach Party. It's kinda crazy like that."
"I see," she said in a tone that was meant to convey that she was going to be introducing him to some advanced Bantos stick work the next time they sparred. Teyla was please to see his smile fade slightly is the message got through.
Teyla shook her head. Earth people were so perplexing sometimes. "So, what exactly is this place?" she inquired as she looked around at all of the strange looking contraptions.
"It's an amusement park," Elizabeth explained. "It's full of rides and games designed to entertain people."
"Ahh!" Teyla exclaimed, turning to Sheppard. "Will we find one of the 'Ferris Wheels' you have spoken so highly of here?"
As a matter of fact...
John directed her gaze behind him.
"Exhibit A," he gestured with a flourish. "You're gonna love it!"
As they walked over, something else came to her attention.
"Are these 'cars'?" she asked as she watched people repeatedly smash into each other in little vehicles.
"Oh, those," he said dismissively. "They're just bumper cars."
"Many of the movies we have watched featured cars being driven at high speeds," she commented as she watched the antics of the people in the cars. "It appeared quite exciting."
"Aww, Teyla! It's nothing like driving a real car! Bumper cars are boring. And really annoying when some 6 year old keeps smashing into you."
"And yet, I would like to try them." Her expression brooked no argument.
John most certainly did not pout. "Fine," he groused and put a hand to his forehead. He could feel a headache coming on.
***
After chasing Teyla around in a bumper car, and getting thoroughly trounced - it was *so* not fair that someone who'd *never* driven any type of vehicle had managed slam him into the rails *repeatedly*, and he was not sulking over it, not at all - Elizabeth surprised him by having a thing for the fast rides.
"This one," Elizabeth indicated.
"Seriously?" John asked, surprised.
"You want to ride the
Hellevator?
"You know this ride pulls almost 5 G's going up, right?"
"I like rides like this," she informed him. "I always have. As a matter of fact-"
"I want to ride the coaster, too."
"I had no idea you had an inner adrenaline junkie," Sheppard replied with a grin.
She smirked. "There's a lot you don't know about me, John."
Meanwhile, Larry has escaped his holding cell and made his way to the park.
"I will find Sheppard and make him return me to my Hive," he seethed as he searched. Oddly, no one seemed to give him a second look, despite the fact he looked so unlike them all.
He was quite puzzled by the lack of fear, until he spotted some humans dressed in dark clothes with very pale skin coming out of a building behind a fence. Curious, he went to take a closer look, and discovered that they were disguised to look very much like Wraith. White paste had been applied to their skin, though some had what appeared to be blood seeping from their orifices, they seemed perfectly fine.
"Hey mister!" came a voice from behind him. Larry whirled around and looked down to see a small human child looking up at him without a trace of fear. "Are you supposed to be a ghost or sumthin?"
He pointed at the child, and a woman that may have been the mother who was approaching fast. "You should fear me - I can suck out your pathetic life in moments!"
Inexplicably, the woman smiled before looking down at the child with a smile. "See, Suzie? I told you he was a scary ghost from the Fright Night haunted house!"
"Aw, he's not very scary," the child dismissed him with an eye roll. "Can we go on the coaster now?"
Larry snarled, and took a menacing step forward.
The woman just laughed. "Kids these days," she said with an apologetic smile. "Nothing scares them when they've grown up with Freddy Kruger and Jason as cultural icons."
"Freddy Kruger?" he asked, nonplussed.
"I know, scared the crap out if me when I was a kid. Anyway, good luck. I gotta take Suzie on the coaster."
And with that, they were gone. Larry's head ached. He was starting to think that if he could just find Sheppard and get home, he'd forget he'd ever heard of the Lanteans, move to some quiet, sparsely populated planet for the rest of his life and only eat enough to stay alive - anything to get off this crazy planet.
Meanwhile, on the other side of the park...
"What is this?" Teyla pointed up at the attraction towering over them.
"That's the
Drop Zone," Sheppard answered. "They strap you into a swing and then pull you to the top of that-" he gestured toward another tower just as tall about 50 feet away, "-and then they let you go."
She tilted her head to one side as she considered the path of descent, the distance of the drop and the likely outcome. A smile stole over her features.
"This looks, as I think you would put it, very cool. I want to try it."
She promptly started to scale the tower.
"Wait, wait!" Sheppard shouted out as he realized she was about to climb up the ride. "Teyla! You can't do that! You have to let them strap you in to the harness and pull you up!"
She looked puzzled. "It seems much faster to simply climb up myself."
"I know, I know, but trust me. You have to do it their way. Safety regulations and rules and all that. Also, I think you're going to give the ride attendant a heart attack if you don't get down right now. And that would not be relaxing."
Larry was starting to wonder if Sheppard really was here after all.
So far, he'd found no trace of the Lanteans, just people who thought he was a menial worker dressed up for some bizarre ritual known as Hal-oh-een.
He'd come very close to eating a group of adolescent boys when they began to jeer and mock him - mock him! But he'd decided that as strong as he was, he was vastly outnumbered, and it could only end badly.
But it was very tempting.
After the Zone, Elizabeth and Teyla consider their options.
"This
Breakdance looks entertaining," Teyla said with a smile. Then again, so far, everything had been fun.
"It is," Elizabeth agreed. "It can leave you a little dizzy though. What do you think, John?"
Sheppard is kind of fixated on a different ride.
"I'm sorry to say that I'm just not interested in that girly ride. C'mon, lets do the
Corkscrew instead!"
"Girly ride?" Teyla asked with a frown.
"Ahh," he backpedaled swiftly. "That is to say, it's a great ride. You girls enjoy it, and I'll just wait over here till you're done."
"What did he mean by Girly ride?" Teyla asked Elizabeth quietly as they climbed on. "His tone of voice sounded dismissive, almost insulting."
"I think," Elizabeth mused aloud, "he meant was that he is in need of a judicious application of your Bantos rods."
Teyla nodded. "That can be arranged."
Sheppard considers the error of his ways.
"Oh really smart, John," he berated himself. "Tell the lady warrior who can kick your ass on a good day with one hand tied behind her back, and your boss, who is fully capable of finding administrative ways to kick your ass, that you think the ride they both want to go on is too girly for you. Good one."
He shook his head. "I am so going to pay for this when we get back..."
***
It wasn't long before they were done their ride. He glumly watched the two of them walking toward him, and out of reflex, he found himself scanning the perimeter for an escape route. He had a flash of brilliance as he gazed at what lay to his left - just the thing to distract them and (hopefully) win his way back into the good books...
"Hey, look! Games!"
John motioned for them to follow him over to where dozens of booths were set up, brightly lit and boasting of many prizes to be won in games of skill and chance.
"Sharp shooting, ring tossing, balls through hoops - they've got it all!" he called out in delight. "I think it's time that we show 'em what we're made of. These games are ridiculously easy -we'll make out like bandits!"
The two women looked at him for a moment before turning to each other and whispering urgently back and forth. Sheppard was starting to wonder if his diversionary tactic had failed and he was going to catch hell anyway when suddenly Teyla placed a hand on Elizabeth's back and gave her a small shove, propelling her forward.
"There was another ride I saw that I wanted to go on," she informed him with a curious smile. "I shall meet the two of you at the tables near the entrance in an hour."
"Err. Well sure. Fine." He scratched the back of his neck as Elizabeth walked up to him, looking a little red in a face, a little nervous, and a bit out of breath.
"You okay?" he asked.
"Oh, yes, great. Never better," she said, with a nervous laugh.
He had warning bells going off in his head because he knew there was Something Going On and he was MISSING it. "Women," he muttered with a sigh, then gave Elizabeth his best charm-the-the-natives smile. "So, what do you want to do first?"
She looked around, then made her choice. "This one," she said as she headed for a booth with brightly coloured balloons pinned to the walls.
"Man, I haven't played this game since I was a kid!"
Sheppard looked up at the balloons. "I used to love this one when I was little, because no matter how bad of a shot you were, there were so many balloons you really couldn't help but win something."
"Oh look!" Elizabeth pointed at the prizes. Sheppard turned to stare at her for just a moment, because he would swear the noise she'd made would qualify as a squeal. He shook his head. Elizabeth Weir did not *squeal* like a school girl.
"The puppy is so adorable!"
Sheppard did a double take. Okay, maybe Elizabeth Weir *did* squeal like a school girl.
"John, do you think you can win it for me?"
He could barely keep his jaw from dropping. Elizabeth was batting her eyelashes and *flirting* with him.
Holy shit.
Some base function is his lizard brain kicked his mouth into gear even as he was still trying to parse, because omg hot unattainable expedition leader flirting and seriously, oh god whatdoIsaywhatdoIsay-.
"Of course I can!"
He picked up a dart, and pointed at the prizes on the far wall.
"I can get you the really big one if you want," he bragged.
"The dinosaur?" she asked, and her eyes widened when he nodded. "It's as big as I am!"
"But we'll be here for a while," he warned. "They always start you with the tiny little prizes, and you work your way up."
She gave him a look that could *only* be described as coy. "I don't really care how long it takes, John. I'm in good company."
And seriously, Holy SHIT!
"Sheppard! SHEPPARD! I know you're here!"
Larry was getting a rather frustrated trying to find the Colonel.
But he thought he might lose his mind if he had to put up with being surrounded by food that was so casually disregarding his presence. He was used to be loathed and feared by humans. Be ignored was disconcerting.
There had been one old woman who'd had a fit of fright when he'd growled at her, but then a gaggle of children had swarmed him and he'd all but run away to escape.
"SHEPPARD!"
If he had to put up with much more of this, he was going to lose what was left of his mind. Larry didn't know exactly how he was going to make Sheppard pay for bringing him to this crazy planet, but it was going to hurt.
While checking out the Music Express, Teyla spots the Wraith.
Teyla tapped her communicator. "Colonel Sheppard, come in! We have a situation."
She got nothing but static.
"Dr. Weir, come in. This is an emergency. Elizabeth, can you hear me?"
With a sigh, Teyla discretely readied her sidearm and slipped through the crowd. Since she'd gone to such an effort to make sure John and Elizabeth got some time alone, *and* they seemed to actually be taking advantage of it, she'd just deal with 'Larry' herself.
Elizabeth was going to owe her big for this. Several pounds of Godiva at the very least.
John just didn't know when to quit sometimes...
...and he was regretting it. Hauling one of these huge ass dinosaurs across the park would have been awkward enough, but no, he had to show off and win two. The damn things were a real pain in the ass to drag along. Even so, it had pretty much been worth it just to watch Elizabeth light up when he presented them to her.
"I had a really good time, John," she said, and there it was, the blush she'd been sporting all afternoon. She kept giving him shy smiles, and he could feel his own mouth curling into a dorky grin.
He felt ridiculously pleased at the praise, and looked down at the ground. It took everything he had to keep from digging a toe into the ground and saying 'aw shucks' and good god, could he be any more pathetic?
Elizabeth decided she wanted to say thank you up close and personal.
Suddenly, she was a whole lot closer to him that before, and he was really warm, and oh wow, she was all pressed up against him and so soft in all the right places, oh god, and talking, she was talking, what the hell was she saying? Focus, John, Focus!
"It was fun be out with someone who was wanted to win me some prizes."
He tried to speak, and nothing came out. He cleared his throat and tried again. "It, ah, it was my pleasure, Elizabeth," he answered, feeling his face heat up under her gaze. "Anytime."
"And," she continued as she moved in so close he could feel the puff of her breath on his lips, "I just wanted to make sure you knew how much I appreciated it."
Having contained the Wraith problem, Teyla showed up just in time to see other things heating up.
"John? Elizabeth? There was a situation with - oh!"
Teyla's face broke out into a grin as she realized that her friends had no idea that she was there, and probably wouldn't clue in for at least a few more minutes. They were otherwise - and thoroughly - occupied.
"Finally!"
She'd known about Elizabeth's interest in the Colonel for some time. It was nice to see something going right for a change.
"Who-hoo!"
~~~ end ~~~