(no subject)
As I write this my brother and his two teenage children, who are leaving what I believe is a very wet and windy UK to come to stay with us in an equally wet and windy South Africa.
Family background:
My brother, who is eighteen months older, and I have never really been friends. We both went to different boarding schools from a young age, and when we were at home in the holidays suffered a pretty awful childhood - (alcoholic stepfather, abuse, beatings etc etc) I always felt annoyed with my brother for not being 'My Protector', and also resented sharing him with my mother. I never really allowed for the fact that he too was suffering, I just blamed him.
I always did very well at school without trying, (although naughty and always in trouble) and he struggled more than I did.
Our real father was a well known actor, who lived a 'glamorous' life in London, and visits to him revealed an unfamiliar (and to me, terrifying) way of life. I think we both disappointed my father, who would introduce us his 'pretty son and his clever daughter' which did NOT help!
So we grew up not really knowing each other. When we were together we always argued, driving my poor mother crazy. It was one of her deepest wishes that somehow we would find a way to get on. As we grew older, I decided I really was not interested in trying to 'sort it', and after my mother died, made no effort at all.
Moving to SA two and a half years ago definitely meant I would never have to try.
Now, he is on his way with the children who are 18 and 16 - I haven't seen them since they were 8 and 6, and then only for a few hours. And he is staying for THREE WEEKS.
I have come out in a skin rash. My stomach sinks when I wake up in the morning. I am not a happy bunny.
Family background:
My brother, who is eighteen months older, and I have never really been friends. We both went to different boarding schools from a young age, and when we were at home in the holidays suffered a pretty awful childhood - (alcoholic stepfather, abuse, beatings etc etc) I always felt annoyed with my brother for not being 'My Protector', and also resented sharing him with my mother. I never really allowed for the fact that he too was suffering, I just blamed him.
I always did very well at school without trying, (although naughty and always in trouble) and he struggled more than I did.
Our real father was a well known actor, who lived a 'glamorous' life in London, and visits to him revealed an unfamiliar (and to me, terrifying) way of life. I think we both disappointed my father, who would introduce us his 'pretty son and his clever daughter' which did NOT help!
So we grew up not really knowing each other. When we were together we always argued, driving my poor mother crazy. It was one of her deepest wishes that somehow we would find a way to get on. As we grew older, I decided I really was not interested in trying to 'sort it', and after my mother died, made no effort at all.
Moving to SA two and a half years ago definitely meant I would never have to try.
Now, he is on his way with the children who are 18 and 16 - I haven't seen them since they were 8 and 6, and then only for a few hours. And he is staying for THREE WEEKS.
I have come out in a skin rash. My stomach sinks when I wake up in the morning. I am not a happy bunny.