Mom the angry martyr
9 Angry Martyr Signs (ANIMATION) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gtWn7XrsKyk
Not all narcissistic mothers are easy to identify. Sometimes it happens that their expression of narcissism is a smothering kind of 'love'. While it may appear on the surface that the angry martyr is devoted to you, her seeming self-sacrifice comes with strings attached. Like all narcissistic mothers, she explodes into narcissistic rage if her child (supply) does not do as she dictates.
It can be very hard for some ACONs to regard their angry martyr mother with an objective eye. They may make justifications or excuses for her abusive behaviour. For those ACONs who are not informed about what constitutes emotional abuse, they are likely to still be in denial about their parental relationship, mistaking what is essentially a complete absence of boundaries between parent and child as 'love' and closeness.
What makes angry martyrs particularly toxic is their covert use of emotional manipulation tactics such as guilt trips and silent treatment in order to get their way and exercise their control over the child. In this way the angry martyr positions herself/himself as victim, and if the child is made to feel bad for being independent. At the extreme end of the scale, the angry martyr is so enmeshed with the child that the child becomes the emotional caretaker of the parent. The enmeshed ACON is smothered to the extent they have no remaining will of their own to break free.
Not all narcissistic mothers are easy to identify. Sometimes it happens that their expression of narcissism is a smothering kind of 'love'. While it may appear on the surface that the angry martyr is devoted to you, her seeming self-sacrifice comes with strings attached. Like all narcissistic mothers, she explodes into narcissistic rage if her child (supply) does not do as she dictates.
It can be very hard for some ACONs to regard their angry martyr mother with an objective eye. They may make justifications or excuses for her abusive behaviour. For those ACONs who are not informed about what constitutes emotional abuse, they are likely to still be in denial about their parental relationship, mistaking what is essentially a complete absence of boundaries between parent and child as 'love' and closeness.
What makes angry martyrs particularly toxic is their covert use of emotional manipulation tactics such as guilt trips and silent treatment in order to get their way and exercise their control over the child. In this way the angry martyr positions herself/himself as victim, and if the child is made to feel bad for being independent. At the extreme end of the scale, the angry martyr is so enmeshed with the child that the child becomes the emotional caretaker of the parent. The enmeshed ACON is smothered to the extent they have no remaining will of their own to break free.