scared

[sexyswimmer5]

i am scared of the future
i am scared that i will never graduate
i am scared that i will be a disappointment
i am scared that i will be a failure
i am scared that i will never find a job
i am scared that i am going to college for nothing
i am scared that i will be alone the rest of my life
i am scared that i will never get everything i have ever wanted in my life
i am scared to lose anyone in my family
i am scared that i will never have my own family
i am scared that i will get stuck doing something i hate
i am just scared.

In my final hours
I'm gonna tie up these loose ends

I wont leave a note
For anyone to find
Tomorrow they'll know
What I've done here tonight

The drastic steps I'm takin'
Are just an act of desperation
I knew no one would miss me
So what the hell
I fought and lied I drank too much
Hurt every one I ever touched
Just how much I hurt you is hard to tell
This is not some kind of cry for help
Just good bye I wish you well
Because I love you
I'm gonna kill myself

Now who is that
In my easy chair
Now wait a minute
That's the old me sittin' there

The drastic steps I'm takin'
Are just an act of desperation
I knew no one would miss me
So what the hell
I fought and lied I drank too much
Hurt every one I ever touched
Just how much I hurt you is hard to tell
This is not some kind of cry for help
Just good bye I wish you well
Because I love you
I have to kill myself

In my final hours I'm gonna tie up these loose ends

im just lost, scared and afraid