musebyquotes | 2.3. Robert Fritz quote
2.3. "If you limit your choices only to what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise"
- Robert Fritz
Co-written with cameronpreston | Follows THIS
There was a change in Pat this visit, and Cameron sensed it immediately as soon his twin walked into the room. Actually the track pants and t-shirt with just Aiden's leather jacket over the top was probably a big indicator. Pat was usually pretty flashy and trendy in his dress. This almost looked like he hadn't felt like taking the effort he usually did... or maybe he didn't have the energy to. Cameron watched as Pat sat in the visitor's chair with his legs curled up underneath him. He had his chin resting on his hand as he watched the rain outside the window. He wasn't very talkative either. "What's up, buddy? Are you feeling sick?" Cameron finally asked.
Pat blinked as he drew his eyes from the view out the window. He gave a slight nod and shifted in the seat. "A little," he confirmed but gave his brother a small smile. "I'm okay. Tired and sore. Sorry for spacing out. I think I left my brain in bed this morning."
Cameron frowned. "You're pale, Patto. Maybe you should have stayed with your brain today," he suggested, putting his magazine aside so Pat had his full attention. "You're missing Aiden, aren't you? You can go back to the States, buddy. Maybe you should too. Like, tomorrow. If you're not well, you don't want to be stuck here if you're coming into a bad period. You should go. I'll follow you when I can. I'm tough. I'll just bitch to Mum and Dad."
Pat wrapped his arms around himself and tucked his fingers into each opposite sleeve as he felt a little chilled, despite the room being warm. "Yeah, I do miss him. Like crazy. Even though I know that's a clingy thing to say considering he's only been gone a few days. But I'm staying," he insisted. "I'm staying here until we can go back to the States together. I'll be okay. I just need a warm shower and some more sleep. Everything's catching up." His voice wavered and before he could stop himself, tears welled up in his eyes and spilled over. "Shit, I'm sorry. It's just the whole... everything. The fight, then you getting hurt, and all the stress. I just... I didn't count on Aiden not being here to... just be here. I miss him. But I'm staying because you need to not be alone right now because even though you aren't saying, I know this is eating you up inside. So, I'm staying. I'm crying and probably going to drip snot all over you, but I'm staying," he said tearfully, reaching over for a generous handful of tissues from the box beside Cameron's bed.
"Patto..." Cameron said, frowning in concern as he leant closer to his brother. "You aren't clingy, fuck. What, you've been married barely a month and... bloody hell, I don't even know what day you got married. I'm an arsehole. But barely a month. Of course you want to be with him and not on opposite sides of the world. It's no wonder you're upset and I was thinking you were holding it all together strangely well, so I'm a little relieved at the tears." He picked up the box of tissues and placed them on the side of the bed in Pat's easy reach. "And yeah, it's eating me up. It's eating me up so much that I don't even know how to begin dealing with it. It's like my worst nightmare has come true and if I stop to think on it too long, it chokes me up and I feel like I can't breathe. I can't even tell you how much it means that you're here and how much you're keeping me sane, because I do need you, Pat, but you need your husband, too. You should go home, buddy. Be with him."
"April tenth." Pat shook his head, wiping is eyes. "I'm staying."
Damnit, that fucking Preston stubborn streak. When Pat occasionally unleased it, it was a fucking monster. "Does Aiden know you're sick? Having symptoms?" Cameron asked, watching Pat closely. His eyes were narrowed slightly as he contemplated the situation, trying to work out a solution in his mind. Pat's answer was going to bear a lot on his next move.
Pat put his hand over his eyes and shook his head. "I'm not looking at you. You're not giving me the eyes. He doesn't need to know right now because they're just not much. It's nothing bad. I'm upright, I can string a sentence together, I'm not wetting myself, and can still write my own name. I'll talk to him when we get back to the States." He took more tissues and wiped at his eyes under his hand, clearing his throat as his voice became thick and nasal from the crying. "I'm just tired and got some pain, that's all. If I tell him, he'll panic and he needs to stay there for Harri because she's his family and she needs him more than I do."
"Slurred speech, shaking hands, pallor..." Cameron added, alerting his twin to how much he really had noticed. "I've seen you like this before, and I've seen you know exactly what you need to do to counteract it, which was just taking to your bed for a few days and hibernating. And then you were okay. But now you're sitting here trying to stretch yourself between both Aiden and me, and trying to ignore yourself in the mix so you can pull it off. How come Aiden didn't notice you were speaking slower?"
"I was crying on the phone. I was having a moment," Pat admitted, shaking his head. "I'm still staying."
Cameron shook his head. "No, you're not. You're not staying, and neither am I. I'm going to speak to my doctor to tell them I'm checking out and going to the States with you. It's a broken leg that's in a cast and I need physio on my shoulder. Nothing could possibly worsen if I leave hospital early and there is not exactly a lot I can do stuck in a hospital bed that I can't do over there. Hell, they can transfer me to the hospital that Izzy's ex is in if they think it's too soon. I don't care. You're going back and I'm coming. You need to be with Aiden and not feeling like you're needed in eight hundred different places at once. Maybe if you're back there, you'll actually go to bed and rest like you need to because me, Aiden, Mum, Dad, Bill, Lachlan, Tara, Riley... everyone... none of us want to see you back in hospital all over again this soon."
Pat's tears had slowed before they even really got started and he leaned forehead, watching Cameron tiredly. "Now you're making me have to argue with you and you know I don't have the energy for that. Bad form, Preston," he said hoarsely with a frown. "You get a red card."
Cameron merely flipped his twin off and sat back, arms crossed. "I can be just as much of a stubborn bitch as you can, Part Two. We will be on a plane back to New York tomorrow morning. Mark my words," he warned. "Mum and Dad will be with us, too, before you can argue about not having the energy to take care of me on a flight," he jumped in before Pat could veer down that route.
"I really want to bitch slap you, but I don't even have the energy for that," Pat said with a scowl. He moved forward and put his head on the side of the mattress with a rough sigh. He closed his eyes, feeling the exhaustion pressing on his tired and sore body. "But I... do want to go home." He was kind of glad Cameron couldn't see his face from this angle. If he could see his twin's eyes, he probably would've started crying all over again because he was just too tired to process all the crap right now. He wanted to be with Aiden and he didn't want to leave his twin. Even though he was already worried about Cameron discharging himself early, his own emotions were winning out. He would love nothing more than to be in New York with both Aiden and Cameron right at that moment.
"Then we're going," Cameron told him, putting his hand on the back of Pat's head and affectionately messing up his hair. "If you're going to fall asleep on me, no drooling or farting."
Pat's face remained firmly planted in the mattress but he put a hand up and managed to accurately give his twin a light slap on the forehead before reaching behind his head and smoothing his hair back into place. "Thanks, Cam," came the muffled response.
"Any time, Patto."
All muses referenced with permission and are from the princeton2nyc universe
Word Count | 1,477
- Robert Fritz
Co-written with cameronpreston | Follows THIS
There was a change in Pat this visit, and Cameron sensed it immediately as soon his twin walked into the room. Actually the track pants and t-shirt with just Aiden's leather jacket over the top was probably a big indicator. Pat was usually pretty flashy and trendy in his dress. This almost looked like he hadn't felt like taking the effort he usually did... or maybe he didn't have the energy to. Cameron watched as Pat sat in the visitor's chair with his legs curled up underneath him. He had his chin resting on his hand as he watched the rain outside the window. He wasn't very talkative either. "What's up, buddy? Are you feeling sick?" Cameron finally asked.
Pat blinked as he drew his eyes from the view out the window. He gave a slight nod and shifted in the seat. "A little," he confirmed but gave his brother a small smile. "I'm okay. Tired and sore. Sorry for spacing out. I think I left my brain in bed this morning."
Cameron frowned. "You're pale, Patto. Maybe you should have stayed with your brain today," he suggested, putting his magazine aside so Pat had his full attention. "You're missing Aiden, aren't you? You can go back to the States, buddy. Maybe you should too. Like, tomorrow. If you're not well, you don't want to be stuck here if you're coming into a bad period. You should go. I'll follow you when I can. I'm tough. I'll just bitch to Mum and Dad."
Pat wrapped his arms around himself and tucked his fingers into each opposite sleeve as he felt a little chilled, despite the room being warm. "Yeah, I do miss him. Like crazy. Even though I know that's a clingy thing to say considering he's only been gone a few days. But I'm staying," he insisted. "I'm staying here until we can go back to the States together. I'll be okay. I just need a warm shower and some more sleep. Everything's catching up." His voice wavered and before he could stop himself, tears welled up in his eyes and spilled over. "Shit, I'm sorry. It's just the whole... everything. The fight, then you getting hurt, and all the stress. I just... I didn't count on Aiden not being here to... just be here. I miss him. But I'm staying because you need to not be alone right now because even though you aren't saying, I know this is eating you up inside. So, I'm staying. I'm crying and probably going to drip snot all over you, but I'm staying," he said tearfully, reaching over for a generous handful of tissues from the box beside Cameron's bed.
"Patto..." Cameron said, frowning in concern as he leant closer to his brother. "You aren't clingy, fuck. What, you've been married barely a month and... bloody hell, I don't even know what day you got married. I'm an arsehole. But barely a month. Of course you want to be with him and not on opposite sides of the world. It's no wonder you're upset and I was thinking you were holding it all together strangely well, so I'm a little relieved at the tears." He picked up the box of tissues and placed them on the side of the bed in Pat's easy reach. "And yeah, it's eating me up. It's eating me up so much that I don't even know how to begin dealing with it. It's like my worst nightmare has come true and if I stop to think on it too long, it chokes me up and I feel like I can't breathe. I can't even tell you how much it means that you're here and how much you're keeping me sane, because I do need you, Pat, but you need your husband, too. You should go home, buddy. Be with him."
"April tenth." Pat shook his head, wiping is eyes. "I'm staying."
Damnit, that fucking Preston stubborn streak. When Pat occasionally unleased it, it was a fucking monster. "Does Aiden know you're sick? Having symptoms?" Cameron asked, watching Pat closely. His eyes were narrowed slightly as he contemplated the situation, trying to work out a solution in his mind. Pat's answer was going to bear a lot on his next move.
Pat put his hand over his eyes and shook his head. "I'm not looking at you. You're not giving me the eyes. He doesn't need to know right now because they're just not much. It's nothing bad. I'm upright, I can string a sentence together, I'm not wetting myself, and can still write my own name. I'll talk to him when we get back to the States." He took more tissues and wiped at his eyes under his hand, clearing his throat as his voice became thick and nasal from the crying. "I'm just tired and got some pain, that's all. If I tell him, he'll panic and he needs to stay there for Harri because she's his family and she needs him more than I do."
"Slurred speech, shaking hands, pallor..." Cameron added, alerting his twin to how much he really had noticed. "I've seen you like this before, and I've seen you know exactly what you need to do to counteract it, which was just taking to your bed for a few days and hibernating. And then you were okay. But now you're sitting here trying to stretch yourself between both Aiden and me, and trying to ignore yourself in the mix so you can pull it off. How come Aiden didn't notice you were speaking slower?"
"I was crying on the phone. I was having a moment," Pat admitted, shaking his head. "I'm still staying."
Cameron shook his head. "No, you're not. You're not staying, and neither am I. I'm going to speak to my doctor to tell them I'm checking out and going to the States with you. It's a broken leg that's in a cast and I need physio on my shoulder. Nothing could possibly worsen if I leave hospital early and there is not exactly a lot I can do stuck in a hospital bed that I can't do over there. Hell, they can transfer me to the hospital that Izzy's ex is in if they think it's too soon. I don't care. You're going back and I'm coming. You need to be with Aiden and not feeling like you're needed in eight hundred different places at once. Maybe if you're back there, you'll actually go to bed and rest like you need to because me, Aiden, Mum, Dad, Bill, Lachlan, Tara, Riley... everyone... none of us want to see you back in hospital all over again this soon."
Pat's tears had slowed before they even really got started and he leaned forehead, watching Cameron tiredly. "Now you're making me have to argue with you and you know I don't have the energy for that. Bad form, Preston," he said hoarsely with a frown. "You get a red card."
Cameron merely flipped his twin off and sat back, arms crossed. "I can be just as much of a stubborn bitch as you can, Part Two. We will be on a plane back to New York tomorrow morning. Mark my words," he warned. "Mum and Dad will be with us, too, before you can argue about not having the energy to take care of me on a flight," he jumped in before Pat could veer down that route.
"I really want to bitch slap you, but I don't even have the energy for that," Pat said with a scowl. He moved forward and put his head on the side of the mattress with a rough sigh. He closed his eyes, feeling the exhaustion pressing on his tired and sore body. "But I... do want to go home." He was kind of glad Cameron couldn't see his face from this angle. If he could see his twin's eyes, he probably would've started crying all over again because he was just too tired to process all the crap right now. He wanted to be with Aiden and he didn't want to leave his twin. Even though he was already worried about Cameron discharging himself early, his own emotions were winning out. He would love nothing more than to be in New York with both Aiden and Cameron right at that moment.
"Then we're going," Cameron told him, putting his hand on the back of Pat's head and affectionately messing up his hair. "If you're going to fall asleep on me, no drooling or farting."
Pat's face remained firmly planted in the mattress but he put a hand up and managed to accurately give his twin a light slap on the forehead before reaching behind his head and smoothing his hair back into place. "Thanks, Cam," came the muffled response.
"Any time, Patto."
All muses referenced with permission and are from the princeton2nyc universe
Word Count | 1,477