I watch crap for shits and giggles and then wonder why I never have enough time
So, that show about cans transforming into hot chicks that literally can't live without whoring themselves out came out.
And i watched it. =D 'Cause I'm masochist like that. So here's a summary + commentary so we can all be masochist together, 'kay? =D
We begin with the main character getting a drink from a vending machine. All's well except for his line: "You'll open wide for anyone who has money." Eeeeerrr..... There's enough problems in that one line to keep a shrink in business for a lifetime.
So, he goes home with his drink and leaves it on his table and goes off to take a shower. I have no fucking clue why he would buy something obviously overpriced from a vending machine if he wasn't going to drink it then and there. Or is this just my cheap, Asian "buy everything in bulk when it goes on sale at WOU-LU-MA-TO" side talking?
We also see that he has a, um, extensive collection of cans. But whatever. After watching Chaos;Head, I don't give a crap what freaky habits Japanese men have.
He takes a sip from the drink, and is suddenly in some weird green dimension thingy with a hot blond kissing him. And apparently, only organic substances can be safely transported through the interdimensional teleportation. All bath towels go POOF. And then they come back to his room. Towel not back on. You can guess what ensues.
So, let's list the criminal offenses committed by a can of juice in, oh, about five seconds.
1. kidnapping
2. sexual harrassment
3. robbery
4. trespassing
5. assault and batter
6. assault and batter to the emotional well being and self esteem of the protagonist by calling him an idiot
7. disrupting the peace of the neighborhood
So.... Can we please hook her onto the bottom of a Jeep and call it a hybrid car?
She throws some bad DBZ imitation of a fireball, which looks more like a cabbage than anything else. It's supposed to be "compressed carbon dioxide." Oh yeah, KAME-HAME-CO2. Yeah... Doesn't have much of a ring to it. I have a love/hate relationship with fantasy stories that try to incorporate science. On one hand, it's very fail and pretty damn insulting to science. On the other hand, who doesn't like fail?
Does Fukuyama Jun play the protagonist? Because there was definitely a Lelouch vibe when he concludes it's all a dream. If he does, then props to the producer for trying to salvage this trainwreck with cute references.
So some weird gay guy comes and talks about some government investigation about girls turning into cans, and due to a "comic" turn of events, is dragged out by his assistant....
And then the cangirl suddenly declares that she's living with him because he's technically her owner. =/ Personally, I'd just drink the rest of her and hope she dies. Unless she would like to, shall I say, give my car an environment friendly upgrade.
We meet his childhood friend at school, and I have no idea how that ties into the plot.....
And then we find out that he has to drink from cangirl or else her life will be meaningless. And straws = dildos. Yeah. I know. Whoever said truth is stranger than fiction can go fuck himself with a straw.
And, yeah, that was the entire episode. There goes another half hour for me.
In other news, I just gave my mom a massage using some scented Chinese oil thingy. And I have just realized how often I rub/scratch my nose. Fuck.
And i watched it. =D 'Cause I'm masochist like that. So here's a summary + commentary so we can all be masochist together, 'kay? =D
We begin with the main character getting a drink from a vending machine. All's well except for his line: "You'll open wide for anyone who has money." Eeeeerrr..... There's enough problems in that one line to keep a shrink in business for a lifetime.
So, he goes home with his drink and leaves it on his table and goes off to take a shower. I have no fucking clue why he would buy something obviously overpriced from a vending machine if he wasn't going to drink it then and there. Or is this just my cheap, Asian "buy everything in bulk when it goes on sale at WOU-LU-MA-TO" side talking?
We also see that he has a, um, extensive collection of cans. But whatever. After watching Chaos;Head, I don't give a crap what freaky habits Japanese men have.
He takes a sip from the drink, and is suddenly in some weird green dimension thingy with a hot blond kissing him. And apparently, only organic substances can be safely transported through the interdimensional teleportation. All bath towels go POOF. And then they come back to his room. Towel not back on. You can guess what ensues.
So, let's list the criminal offenses committed by a can of juice in, oh, about five seconds.
1. kidnapping
2. sexual harrassment
3. robbery
4. trespassing
5. assault and batter
6. assault and batter to the emotional well being and self esteem of the protagonist by calling him an idiot
7. disrupting the peace of the neighborhood
So.... Can we please hook her onto the bottom of a Jeep and call it a hybrid car?
She throws some bad DBZ imitation of a fireball, which looks more like a cabbage than anything else. It's supposed to be "compressed carbon dioxide." Oh yeah, KAME-HAME-CO2. Yeah... Doesn't have much of a ring to it. I have a love/hate relationship with fantasy stories that try to incorporate science. On one hand, it's very fail and pretty damn insulting to science. On the other hand, who doesn't like fail?
Does Fukuyama Jun play the protagonist? Because there was definitely a Lelouch vibe when he concludes it's all a dream. If he does, then props to the producer for trying to salvage this trainwreck with cute references.
So some weird gay guy comes and talks about some government investigation about girls turning into cans, and due to a "comic" turn of events, is dragged out by his assistant....
And then the cangirl suddenly declares that she's living with him because he's technically her owner. =/ Personally, I'd just drink the rest of her and hope she dies. Unless she would like to, shall I say, give my car an environment friendly upgrade.
We meet his childhood friend at school, and I have no idea how that ties into the plot.....
And then we find out that he has to drink from cangirl or else her life will be meaningless. And straws = dildos. Yeah. I know. Whoever said truth is stranger than fiction can go fuck himself with a straw.
And, yeah, that was the entire episode. There goes another half hour for me.
In other news, I just gave my mom a massage using some scented Chinese oil thingy. And I have just realized how often I rub/scratch my nose. Fuck.