Comments | sever916: time is perception

sever916

time is perception

May 03, 2007 03:14

"it was time" she tells me.... again. the first "time" was when she was told by her boy (yes I said BOY - he's not a MAN by any stretch) that she should return the key to our apartment. (Yes, I still call it "ours" - for all it's worth to me, it IS still ours. I highly doubt I could ever have another person live here and not think that it's mine ( Read more... )

Comments 5

eternally_vixen May 5 2007, 19:44:57 UTC

I know this sounds a bit harsh, like all my comments do, but I think this was the only solution that was the best for you both. She could have been more upfront about it, but I don't think she wants to hurt you or get in an argument. In this way she is gently letting you know that she still cares for you as a friend. But she left the token of you love behind because unlike friendship, she doesn't need your passion. The key was almost a sign of your last hope with her. She is done with that part of her life and she knows that she cannot dwell on her past decisions, there's not much she can do about it now. She has to work on her future, not on her past. You need to do the same. Don't dwell on Kerry, that part of your life is done for now. It may be again in the future, as friends, or maybe more, but don't hope for it, don't expect it.

sever916 May 6 2007, 05:28:02 UTC

and that's what she said, too. she originally tried to make it out - again - that I was the one having trouble letting go and moving on. Yet, I pointed out her actions and indications, explaining to her why. she's said that she cant move forward with him while someone like me is there for her as much as I am. A compliment, to be sure, but understood as something else. and as far as the last hope comment - it wasn't so much that. If she never used the key again, so be it... it was just a way for her to be able to have access in the event of something going wrong. My door is open for her anytime - she need only call ( ... )

eternally_vixen May 6 2007, 20:47:48 UTC

I know, I'm sorry, but it just sucks to see you keep hurting is all. I want you to be happy again. She can still find you in the event of something going wrong, I'm sure.

I'm not too sure about the noise levels, since we're going to be in an apartment, but we definitely get to be louder than if we were, say, at my house XD. I'm really excited, but it's quite stressful too. There's so many things we have to plan for and buy o_O. I just hope Jesse doesn't get sick of being around me all the time.

kmace May 6 2007, 18:06:51 UTC

"Among other things, I told her I was glad that she was happy with him. I was glad that I could be a filler for the time until she could be with him again."

Trevor, seriously, you need to cut that shit out. Not once was that my feeling towards our relationship and I never like when you treat it as such. That's another slight factor why I left my key - As much as I know what I did was messed up, I still think it's messed up to write off our entire relationship because of that.

sever916 May 6 2007, 19:20:26 UTC

I had a lot of stuff written here, but I deleted it and I'll just say this....

if nothing else, I wrote that as part of the journal. it's called a "fact". The simple concept of "this is what transpired". You may not have remembered me saying it, but that doesn't mean I didn't.