April Fools Day: the only day where it's socially acceptable to be a lying d-bag.
I hate daylight savings time.
I'm also gonna have to be on my toes about April Fools Day. I'm always the one that ends up looking like the gullible a-hole. This is, of course, because I am a gullible a-hole. Mostly because I ALWAYS forget to check my calendar and then someone comes along squawking that the sky is falling and I, like an idiot, rush out to buy all the umbrellas I can find.*
Not fun. I don't know who was the asshat that thought it was a good idea to start this day. Like someone just went, here's a GREAT idea. Let's pick a day where we act like total douches and pick on the village idiot that ends up buying our shit. UGH. And then it's always something mean. Why can't it ever be something small and harmless, like casually remarking during lunch that you're thinking of getting a gold tooth? Or that you're seriously considering growing a Tom Selleck style mustache?
Why does it always have to be something personal like, "Dude, I totally just saw someone keying your car. SUCKS." 'Cause you know that even if I think you're full of crap, I'm gonna be running like a madwoman to the car thinking, WHERE'S MY SHIV WHEN I NEED IT.
*This is an exaggerated example. PLEASE DON'T THINK I'M THIS STUPID, KAY?
I'm also gonna have to be on my toes about April Fools Day. I'm always the one that ends up looking like the gullible a-hole. This is, of course, because I am a gullible a-hole. Mostly because I ALWAYS forget to check my calendar and then someone comes along squawking that the sky is falling and I, like an idiot, rush out to buy all the umbrellas I can find.*
Not fun. I don't know who was the asshat that thought it was a good idea to start this day. Like someone just went, here's a GREAT idea. Let's pick a day where we act like total douches and pick on the village idiot that ends up buying our shit. UGH. And then it's always something mean. Why can't it ever be something small and harmless, like casually remarking during lunch that you're thinking of getting a gold tooth? Or that you're seriously considering growing a Tom Selleck style mustache?
Why does it always have to be something personal like, "Dude, I totally just saw someone keying your car. SUCKS." 'Cause you know that even if I think you're full of crap, I'm gonna be running like a madwoman to the car thinking, WHERE'S MY SHIV WHEN I NEED IT.
*This is an exaggerated example. PLEASE DON'T THINK I'M THIS STUPID, KAY?