(no subject)
The third (AND HOPEFULLY FINAL) part to my ludicrous dragon crackfic. Sorry this took so long, guys - I got insanely stuck on the last scene. Thanks to jamesinboots for her lovely beta job!
Aero 3/3, PG-13, J2, 3150 words, THE LAST PART OF THE LUDICROUS DRAGON PORN.
Although this part doesn't actually contain any porn. Sorry, man. Potentially there will be an outtake if rosekay harasses me enough. Or some Jared POV. But let's just say that this completes the (basic) fic!
Warnings for potential dubious consent. Also, you know, more telepathic dragon shenanigans. Because Anne McCaffrey is just awesome like that.
Also, I took wild and crazy liberties with the Pern universe, so if you're a purist, beware. Now there's oatmeal and complex dragon behavior. Oops.
PART ONE
PART TWO
When Jensen wakes up the next morning, the other half of the bed is still warm, but Jared is gone. Jensen's clothes are folded, sitting on a chair next to the dresser, and there's steam rising from a tub in front of the fireplace. Jensen's debating whether the tub is for him - he's used to bathing in the common baths, since having staff to draw a bath is a privilege reserved for wingleaders - when he realizes the wry amusement inside his head is coming from somewhere else.
He left you breakfast, too, Casserath says. All gentleman-like.
Shut up, Jensen says, without any real bite behind it; he doesn't have to move far to be aware of the fact that he's sore as hell, and the mirror next to Jared's dresser reveals an impressive number of bite marks between his shoulder and his neck. Jensen's not exactly surprised to find bruises on his hips, either.
Is he coming back? Jensen asks, and there's a longer than usual response time.
He's running drills with the blues, Casserath says, in a tone that usually means she's keeping something from him, and Jensen's stomach sinks. Jared's been nice - kind, even - but Jensen knew better than to think that a mating flight might mean something.
It takes longer than Jensen likes to convince himself to roll out of bed. The water's hot enough that it stings everywhere Jensen's skin is broken, and Jensen scrubs a little viciously at his stomach, the insides of his thighs, trying to ignore his own stupidity. He finally sinks down into the water, ducking underneath to rinse the soap out of his hair. Jensen's allowing exactly thirty seconds of feeling sorry for himself, then moving on. He's had classes, lectures on how it's supposed to be casual. If something's so casual that it doesn't count as cheating when you're married, Jensen's reasonably certain that he's not supposed to get attached because of one night of sex.
Jensen climbs out and gets dressed as quickly as possible, ignoring the tray of food sitting on the bedside table.
You're going to need a higher collar, Casserath observes, sounding amused.
Fuck, Jensen says, and prepares for a very long day.
Jensen's four hour tactical seminar with the first year greens and blues runs over by almost half an hour, and by the time Jensen gets out of class, there's no point in even trying the mess hall. He's so tired he barely manages to get back to his rooms, and Jensen sleeps through most of the afternoon. When he wakes up, it's nearly dinnertime. The last thing Jensen wants is to deal with an entire dining room full of people, but he knows better than to skip three meals in one day. He's starting to consider sneaking into the kitchens for some cheese and fruit when someone knocks on his door.
"Hi," Jared says. He's holding a tray of food, awkwardly, and it takes Jensen a good thirty seconds to realize that Jared's blushing, not overheated.
"Hey," Jensen says, then tugs his collar up self-consciously, trying to ignore the way Jared's staring.
He brought you dinner, Casserath observes, somewhat unnecessarily. When Jensen realizes that Jared's checking up on him, he can't decide whether to be mortified or relieved; Jared's calm and confident, never anything less than perfectly relaxed, and Jensen's never seen him caught off guard or upset, even in the middle of a thread attack.
Jensen's not sure if he's regretting the decision, worried, or just unsure of what to do - Jensen's never heard any rumors about Jared making a habit of catching first flight dragons - but Jensen's known Jared for three years, and he's reasonably certain that he's not going to leave until he's gotten what he came for.
"I thought -" Jared starts, holding the tray out in front of him, and Jensen pulls the door open further, stepping back.
"Thanks," Jensen says. Jared steps in out of the darkness of the hallway, and Jensen realizes that there's more than enough food for two people on the tray when Jared sets it on his coffee table.
"Kristen said you missed lunch," Jared says, and it takes Jensen a minute to place the look on his face as concern.
"I got caught in class," Jensen says, trying not to laugh. "Questions at the end ran over by almost twenty minutes, and the fourth wing is back from South Weyr. I figured there wouldn't be anything left if I went to the mess hall."
Jared looks at him for a long moment, then lifts a hand, like he's planning on touching Jensen's face. Jensen freezes, still holding on to the doorknob, and Jared blinks and lets his hand fall, taking a step back.
"I used to hate teaching first years," Jared says, finally.
"They're… easily distracted," Jensen says, and Jared laughs, looking a little more relaxed.
"I thought you might be hungry," Jared says, shifting, like he thinks Jensen's going to say no, and Jensen turns to shut the door.
"Starving," Jensen agrees, and sits down on the sofa.
Dinner's easy, less awkward than Jensen's expecting, and when Jared tenses up again at the end of the meal, Jensen offers to show him the chess set his parents sent for the holidays. After two games and half a pitcher of wine - Jared's not particularly good at chess, as it turns out, and the alcohol probably isn't helping - Jared starts yawning.
"Did you want -" Jensen says, interrupted by another of Jared's yawns, and Jared laughs.
"Yeah, I didn't get much sleep last night," Jared says, standing up, and Jensen's expecting him to open the door, not to sit on the edge of his bed and start unlacing his tunic, pulling back the blankets with his free hand.
"You really can't hold your liquor, can you," Jensen says, ignoring the way his pulse picks up at the sight of Jared in his bed, and Jared looks up, blinking.
"What?" he says.
"We're in my rooms," Jensen reminds him. "Your bed is two flights down."
Jared stares, then abruptly ducks his head, flushing. "Sorry, I -" he manages, and Jensen gets up off his sofa to offer him a hand.
"Maybe I should walk you back," he says. Jared shakes his head.
"It's not that far," he says. "I'll see you tomorrow."
Jensen's not sure what to expect when Jared finds him the next day at lunch, but it's significantly less complicated than the night before, and they spend the better part of an hour discussing the expansion of the east wing of the weyr and lesson plans. Things seem normal, at least until three o'clock, when Jensen goes to mount Casserath for a drill. She's not in her weyr - not entirely surprising, given that she's spent the last two days in Seraneth's - but she's not asleep and Jensen's more than a little surprised when she doesn't respond to his request that she fly down.
Are you sick? Jensen says, fighting down concern, and realizes that she's felt off ever since the mating flight. Fighting greens don't typically lay eggs, but it's not entirely unheard of, and Jensen takes the stairs to the bronze weyrs faster than he usually would. If she's not gravid, then something's probably wrong, since Casserath's never refused a request before. Jensen's considering calling for one of the medics when he climbs the last of the way into Seraneth's weyr and finds Seraneth wrapped around her. Seraneth opens one sleepy eye when Jensen steps forward, but it's obvious that Casserath's not trapped, and she shakes her wings out and untangles herself, twining around Jensen.
Stop worrying, Casserath says, butting her head against his stomach while Jensen runs his hands over her snout, feeling guilty. Jensen's seen her since, but he's been busy worrying about Jared and teaching and the twenty-eight exams he's supposed to have graded by Friday, and he realizes suddenly that he's been neglecting the most important thing.
Casserath blows hot air against his face, amused again, and Jensen leans into her; her eyes are clear and her color isn't dull, but it isn't bright enough for her to have eggs, either. Stop it, she says. You pay plenty of attention to me.
I should have been up here, Jensen murmurs, pressing his face against her warm scales, and with her, there's no point in lying; it's easier to be busy than overwhelmed, and Jensen's not ready to think about any of it.
He's startled to feel a bump against his back, Seraneth's much larger snout pushing him forward, and Jensen tries not to jump. Dragons don't typically touch anyone other than their riders, let alone talk to them, and Jensen suddenly recognizes the vague, investigative presence in the back of his head as Seraneth. He feels a little like Jared.
Uh, Cass? Jensen says, when Seraneth nudges him again.
Stop worrying, she says, again, and Jensen turns around and lets Seraneth press his nose up against Jensen's chest. Jensen slides his hands over Seraneth's face, over the scales above his eyes, and laughs when he makes the same soft, satisfied noise Jensen's used to hearing from Casserath.
I don't want to do drills, Casserath says, finally, when Jensen's rubbing underneath Seraneth's jaw, and you should stay here for a while.
Yeah, okay, Jensen says, suddenly exhausted, and settles in between her front legs, still stroking Seraneth.
When he wakes up a few hours later, he's warm, in the middle of a tight dragon ball, and Jared's pulling himself up into the weyr.
"You can't just refuse to demonstrate for the browns," Jared says, and Jensen's startled to hear Seraneth growl. Jared's always been the type of rider who talks out loud to his dragon when they're in the same place, something Jensen's always appreciated during battles, but it only takes him a second to realize Jared can't see him. Then it just feels like an invasion of privacy.
"I have my act together, I -" Jared says, shoving his flying glasses back and rubbing a hand over his face. "He's not interested in -"
"Uh, hi," Jensen says, and Jared jumps, then stares for a second at Jensen's position between the dragons.
Jensen climbs to his feet, dusting himself off and trying not to stretch too obviously, and Jared finally steps forward and offers a hand.
"She says she's not sick, but she wouldn't do drills," Jensen says, awkwardly, and looks back over his shoulder, where Seraneth's wrapped around his dragon again. "I don't - do they usually do this?"
"No," Jared says, almost sharply, then rubs a hand over his face again.
"Sorry," he says. "It's been a long day."
"I think the browns can live without you for an afternoon," Jensen says, reaching to squeeze Jared's shoulder, mostly because he looks worn out, pale and almost drawn.
"Probably," Jared says, finally, looking at Jensen's hand on his shoulder until Jensen pulls it back.
"Get some sleep," Jensen says. "And something to eat."
"Thanks," Jared says, finally. By the time Jensen starts to climb down, he's leaning up against Seraneth, talking softly.
Jensen's used to Jared's meal rotation schedule - he tries to eat with every class at least twice a week - so he's not really expecting the knock on his door to be Jared, again, with dinner. Even with the nap, Jensen's tired and still worried about Casserath, and after Jared sneaks a look in his direction for what feels like the twentieth time, Jensen pushes his plate back.
"I'm fine," he says, and Jared looks up, startled.
"What?" he says.
"I'm fine," Jensen says, and it comes out rougher than he means it to. "I'm not traumatized or hurt, you don't have to do this."
"What?" Jared says, again, and Jensen picks up his plate and puts it back on the tray.
"You don't have to keep checking on me," Jensen says, quietly. "I'm fine. It was just sex, Jared."
"I wasn't -" Jared says, then swallows hard. "Right, I'll just -" he gestures at the door, then stands.
"Thanks for dinner," Jensen says, finally, and Jared nods, once, and lets himself out.
There's a long pause, once where Jensen feels abruptly and inexplicably guilty.
I love you, Casserath says, but sometimes you're an idiot.
I know, Jensen says, finally, and starts to clean up their half-eaten meal.
Over the next two days, Casserath doesn't leave Seraneth's weyr, and Jensen doesn't see Jared. Jensen doesn't want to think it's intentional, but after the third time Jared ducks out of a room when he walks in, Jensen has to admit that he probably was sharper than he meant to be. Jared's a good guy, the kind of guy who looks after people, and it's not Jared's fault he made the mistake of sleeping with someone who has feelings for him. Jensen's almost looking forward to class, just to have an opportunity to apologize, but when Jensen settles down in the front row, Jared turns around from a conversation with another student, goes pale, and ducks out the door. It's fifteen minutes past the starting bell when Misha walks in.
"Rider Padalecki isn't feeling well," he says. "I'll be instructing tonight, if someone would be so kind as to fill me in on what section you're covering?"
Jensen abruptly feels a lot worse.
When he stops by Jared's quarters to apologize, no one answers. Jensen waits for twenty minutes, but Jared doesn't come back, and even the infirmary doesn't yield anything. The next morning at breakfast, the other greens are clustered around a table, and when Jensen walks past them to get a tray, they all stare, whispering.
Luckily, there's no one else in line, so Jensen ignores them, filling a bowl with oatmeal. He's trying to decide between coffee and tea when Kristen bumps his shoulder.
"So Padalecki got in a fist fight with all the browns in second wing last night," she says, sort of conversational, and Jensen pauses with a hand half way to the mugs.
"Jared?" he says.
"When bronzes bond, it can lead to testosterone spikes," Kristen says, quietly, like she's saying something obvious. Jensen takes a mug.
"You mean mate," Jensen says, ignoring the way his face heats.
"Bond," Kristen says. "Look over your notes on behavior. They're not monogamous from a strict perspective, but some bronzes show permanent preferences, it's - you know the pair at West? The queen and the bronze?"
"No one else even flies for her," Jensen says, finally.
"You might want to talk to Jared before he gets into any more drunken brawls," Kristen says, dryly. "I'll take that."
Jensen nearly passes over his tray, then thinks better of it, filling another plate with food. It's probably better to go with a peace offering.
Jared doesn't open the door on the first knock, but Jensen isn't in the mood to quit. It's not long before he hears someone cursing their way across the room.
"What?" Jared says, yanking the door open, and Jensen shoves a shoulder in the door before Jared can slam it in his face.
"I thought you might be hungry," Jensen says, firmly, and waits while Jared stares.
Jared's room is dim, but he's not wearing a shirt, and it's easy for Jensen to see the bruises along his ribcage and over his stomach. When Jared pulls the door open further, Jensen realizes he has an impressive black eye. He's still scowling, an expression that's not entirely familiar, and he crosses his arms.
"We need to talk," Jensen says. Jared doesn't respond, but when Jensen looks more closely, he realizes that Jared's eyes aren't focused; Jensen pushes past him through the door and waits for him to finish arguing with Seraneth, setting down the tray of food on the table.
"You shouldn't be here," Jared says, finally. He's tense, barely holding himself in place, and he looks miserable. Jensen has to wrap his hands around a cup of coffee to keep from touching him.
"I wanted to apologize," Jensen says, awkwardly; he's never been good at this. "I was rude to you, and I'm sorry."
"I wasn't checking up on you," Jared bites out, finally.
"I can't do anything about Seraneth," Jensen says. "But I'm not expecting anything, I won't bother you."
"Bother me?" Jared says, but for the first time, he sounds curious instead of angry.
Jensen takes a deep breath and lets it out.
"I know that mating flights don't mean anything," he manages. "I didn't want to ask for more of your time or attention or - I'm not trying to be unprofessional."
Jensen stares firmly at his coffee cup, trying to ignore how warm his face feels and the way that Jared's probably looking at him. He tries not to jump when Jared sits down beside him, warm and too close.
"I wasn't checking on you," Jared repeats. He sounds tired. "You weren't asking too much. I - it's supposed to just be sex, it's always just sex, but I -"
"I never thought about it," he says. "You're smart and a decent guy and I've always liked being around you, but I never thought about it. And I was just - I didn't want it to be a bad experience, I didn't think it would be a big deal, it never -" Jared swallows. "But now I can't stop thinking about it. I showed up because I wanted to see you, I wanted -"
"To see me?" Jensen repeats, looking up, and realizes that Jared's even more flushed than he is.
"You're not the one who's being unprofessional," Jared says, which is when Jensen realizes what Jared's trying to say.
"You like me?" Jensen says, close to incredulous, and Jared looks away, reaching for a mug like he needs something to do with his hands.
"Yeah," Jared says, softly.
For a long moment, Jensen isn't sure, but when Jared rubs a hand over his face and starts to stand, it suddenly seems obvious.
"Sorry," Jared says, "I'll -" and Jensen leans in and kisses him. He feels Jared startle, jerking back, but Jensen wraps a hand around his wrist and pulls him back down, easing him into a longer, deeper kiss.
"Shh," Jensen says, against his mouth, and Jared finally gives in and kisses back, leaning into the hand Jensen has pressed against his face.
"I -" Jared says, finally, pulling back. Jensen follows, kissing him again, and when he finally stops to breathe, Jared's eyes don't leave his face.
"I've liked you for a while," Jensen admits, and Jared finally smiles.
"I should have, uh -" he says. "Talked to you. I can be a little -"
Stubborn, Seraneth says, and Jensen laughs.
"Bronzes," he says, finally, affectionately, "you're all the same," and leans in to kiss Jared, again.
Aero 3/3, PG-13, J2, 3150 words, THE LAST PART OF THE LUDICROUS DRAGON PORN.
Although this part doesn't actually contain any porn. Sorry, man. Potentially there will be an outtake if rosekay harasses me enough. Or some Jared POV. But let's just say that this completes the (basic) fic!
Warnings for potential dubious consent. Also, you know, more telepathic dragon shenanigans. Because Anne McCaffrey is just awesome like that.
Also, I took wild and crazy liberties with the Pern universe, so if you're a purist, beware. Now there's oatmeal and complex dragon behavior. Oops.
PART ONE
PART TWO
When Jensen wakes up the next morning, the other half of the bed is still warm, but Jared is gone. Jensen's clothes are folded, sitting on a chair next to the dresser, and there's steam rising from a tub in front of the fireplace. Jensen's debating whether the tub is for him - he's used to bathing in the common baths, since having staff to draw a bath is a privilege reserved for wingleaders - when he realizes the wry amusement inside his head is coming from somewhere else.
He left you breakfast, too, Casserath says. All gentleman-like.
Shut up, Jensen says, without any real bite behind it; he doesn't have to move far to be aware of the fact that he's sore as hell, and the mirror next to Jared's dresser reveals an impressive number of bite marks between his shoulder and his neck. Jensen's not exactly surprised to find bruises on his hips, either.
Is he coming back? Jensen asks, and there's a longer than usual response time.
He's running drills with the blues, Casserath says, in a tone that usually means she's keeping something from him, and Jensen's stomach sinks. Jared's been nice - kind, even - but Jensen knew better than to think that a mating flight might mean something.
It takes longer than Jensen likes to convince himself to roll out of bed. The water's hot enough that it stings everywhere Jensen's skin is broken, and Jensen scrubs a little viciously at his stomach, the insides of his thighs, trying to ignore his own stupidity. He finally sinks down into the water, ducking underneath to rinse the soap out of his hair. Jensen's allowing exactly thirty seconds of feeling sorry for himself, then moving on. He's had classes, lectures on how it's supposed to be casual. If something's so casual that it doesn't count as cheating when you're married, Jensen's reasonably certain that he's not supposed to get attached because of one night of sex.
Jensen climbs out and gets dressed as quickly as possible, ignoring the tray of food sitting on the bedside table.
You're going to need a higher collar, Casserath observes, sounding amused.
Fuck, Jensen says, and prepares for a very long day.
Jensen's four hour tactical seminar with the first year greens and blues runs over by almost half an hour, and by the time Jensen gets out of class, there's no point in even trying the mess hall. He's so tired he barely manages to get back to his rooms, and Jensen sleeps through most of the afternoon. When he wakes up, it's nearly dinnertime. The last thing Jensen wants is to deal with an entire dining room full of people, but he knows better than to skip three meals in one day. He's starting to consider sneaking into the kitchens for some cheese and fruit when someone knocks on his door.
"Hi," Jared says. He's holding a tray of food, awkwardly, and it takes Jensen a good thirty seconds to realize that Jared's blushing, not overheated.
"Hey," Jensen says, then tugs his collar up self-consciously, trying to ignore the way Jared's staring.
He brought you dinner, Casserath observes, somewhat unnecessarily. When Jensen realizes that Jared's checking up on him, he can't decide whether to be mortified or relieved; Jared's calm and confident, never anything less than perfectly relaxed, and Jensen's never seen him caught off guard or upset, even in the middle of a thread attack.
Jensen's not sure if he's regretting the decision, worried, or just unsure of what to do - Jensen's never heard any rumors about Jared making a habit of catching first flight dragons - but Jensen's known Jared for three years, and he's reasonably certain that he's not going to leave until he's gotten what he came for.
"I thought -" Jared starts, holding the tray out in front of him, and Jensen pulls the door open further, stepping back.
"Thanks," Jensen says. Jared steps in out of the darkness of the hallway, and Jensen realizes that there's more than enough food for two people on the tray when Jared sets it on his coffee table.
"Kristen said you missed lunch," Jared says, and it takes Jensen a minute to place the look on his face as concern.
"I got caught in class," Jensen says, trying not to laugh. "Questions at the end ran over by almost twenty minutes, and the fourth wing is back from South Weyr. I figured there wouldn't be anything left if I went to the mess hall."
Jared looks at him for a long moment, then lifts a hand, like he's planning on touching Jensen's face. Jensen freezes, still holding on to the doorknob, and Jared blinks and lets his hand fall, taking a step back.
"I used to hate teaching first years," Jared says, finally.
"They're… easily distracted," Jensen says, and Jared laughs, looking a little more relaxed.
"I thought you might be hungry," Jared says, shifting, like he thinks Jensen's going to say no, and Jensen turns to shut the door.
"Starving," Jensen agrees, and sits down on the sofa.
Dinner's easy, less awkward than Jensen's expecting, and when Jared tenses up again at the end of the meal, Jensen offers to show him the chess set his parents sent for the holidays. After two games and half a pitcher of wine - Jared's not particularly good at chess, as it turns out, and the alcohol probably isn't helping - Jared starts yawning.
"Did you want -" Jensen says, interrupted by another of Jared's yawns, and Jared laughs.
"Yeah, I didn't get much sleep last night," Jared says, standing up, and Jensen's expecting him to open the door, not to sit on the edge of his bed and start unlacing his tunic, pulling back the blankets with his free hand.
"You really can't hold your liquor, can you," Jensen says, ignoring the way his pulse picks up at the sight of Jared in his bed, and Jared looks up, blinking.
"What?" he says.
"We're in my rooms," Jensen reminds him. "Your bed is two flights down."
Jared stares, then abruptly ducks his head, flushing. "Sorry, I -" he manages, and Jensen gets up off his sofa to offer him a hand.
"Maybe I should walk you back," he says. Jared shakes his head.
"It's not that far," he says. "I'll see you tomorrow."
Jensen's not sure what to expect when Jared finds him the next day at lunch, but it's significantly less complicated than the night before, and they spend the better part of an hour discussing the expansion of the east wing of the weyr and lesson plans. Things seem normal, at least until three o'clock, when Jensen goes to mount Casserath for a drill. She's not in her weyr - not entirely surprising, given that she's spent the last two days in Seraneth's - but she's not asleep and Jensen's more than a little surprised when she doesn't respond to his request that she fly down.
Are you sick? Jensen says, fighting down concern, and realizes that she's felt off ever since the mating flight. Fighting greens don't typically lay eggs, but it's not entirely unheard of, and Jensen takes the stairs to the bronze weyrs faster than he usually would. If she's not gravid, then something's probably wrong, since Casserath's never refused a request before. Jensen's considering calling for one of the medics when he climbs the last of the way into Seraneth's weyr and finds Seraneth wrapped around her. Seraneth opens one sleepy eye when Jensen steps forward, but it's obvious that Casserath's not trapped, and she shakes her wings out and untangles herself, twining around Jensen.
Stop worrying, Casserath says, butting her head against his stomach while Jensen runs his hands over her snout, feeling guilty. Jensen's seen her since, but he's been busy worrying about Jared and teaching and the twenty-eight exams he's supposed to have graded by Friday, and he realizes suddenly that he's been neglecting the most important thing.
Casserath blows hot air against his face, amused again, and Jensen leans into her; her eyes are clear and her color isn't dull, but it isn't bright enough for her to have eggs, either. Stop it, she says. You pay plenty of attention to me.
I should have been up here, Jensen murmurs, pressing his face against her warm scales, and with her, there's no point in lying; it's easier to be busy than overwhelmed, and Jensen's not ready to think about any of it.
He's startled to feel a bump against his back, Seraneth's much larger snout pushing him forward, and Jensen tries not to jump. Dragons don't typically touch anyone other than their riders, let alone talk to them, and Jensen suddenly recognizes the vague, investigative presence in the back of his head as Seraneth. He feels a little like Jared.
Uh, Cass? Jensen says, when Seraneth nudges him again.
Stop worrying, she says, again, and Jensen turns around and lets Seraneth press his nose up against Jensen's chest. Jensen slides his hands over Seraneth's face, over the scales above his eyes, and laughs when he makes the same soft, satisfied noise Jensen's used to hearing from Casserath.
I don't want to do drills, Casserath says, finally, when Jensen's rubbing underneath Seraneth's jaw, and you should stay here for a while.
Yeah, okay, Jensen says, suddenly exhausted, and settles in between her front legs, still stroking Seraneth.
When he wakes up a few hours later, he's warm, in the middle of a tight dragon ball, and Jared's pulling himself up into the weyr.
"You can't just refuse to demonstrate for the browns," Jared says, and Jensen's startled to hear Seraneth growl. Jared's always been the type of rider who talks out loud to his dragon when they're in the same place, something Jensen's always appreciated during battles, but it only takes him a second to realize Jared can't see him. Then it just feels like an invasion of privacy.
"I have my act together, I -" Jared says, shoving his flying glasses back and rubbing a hand over his face. "He's not interested in -"
"Uh, hi," Jensen says, and Jared jumps, then stares for a second at Jensen's position between the dragons.
Jensen climbs to his feet, dusting himself off and trying not to stretch too obviously, and Jared finally steps forward and offers a hand.
"She says she's not sick, but she wouldn't do drills," Jensen says, awkwardly, and looks back over his shoulder, where Seraneth's wrapped around his dragon again. "I don't - do they usually do this?"
"No," Jared says, almost sharply, then rubs a hand over his face again.
"Sorry," he says. "It's been a long day."
"I think the browns can live without you for an afternoon," Jensen says, reaching to squeeze Jared's shoulder, mostly because he looks worn out, pale and almost drawn.
"Probably," Jared says, finally, looking at Jensen's hand on his shoulder until Jensen pulls it back.
"Get some sleep," Jensen says. "And something to eat."
"Thanks," Jared says, finally. By the time Jensen starts to climb down, he's leaning up against Seraneth, talking softly.
Jensen's used to Jared's meal rotation schedule - he tries to eat with every class at least twice a week - so he's not really expecting the knock on his door to be Jared, again, with dinner. Even with the nap, Jensen's tired and still worried about Casserath, and after Jared sneaks a look in his direction for what feels like the twentieth time, Jensen pushes his plate back.
"I'm fine," he says, and Jared looks up, startled.
"What?" he says.
"I'm fine," Jensen says, and it comes out rougher than he means it to. "I'm not traumatized or hurt, you don't have to do this."
"What?" Jared says, again, and Jensen picks up his plate and puts it back on the tray.
"You don't have to keep checking on me," Jensen says, quietly. "I'm fine. It was just sex, Jared."
"I wasn't -" Jared says, then swallows hard. "Right, I'll just -" he gestures at the door, then stands.
"Thanks for dinner," Jensen says, finally, and Jared nods, once, and lets himself out.
There's a long pause, once where Jensen feels abruptly and inexplicably guilty.
I love you, Casserath says, but sometimes you're an idiot.
I know, Jensen says, finally, and starts to clean up their half-eaten meal.
Over the next two days, Casserath doesn't leave Seraneth's weyr, and Jensen doesn't see Jared. Jensen doesn't want to think it's intentional, but after the third time Jared ducks out of a room when he walks in, Jensen has to admit that he probably was sharper than he meant to be. Jared's a good guy, the kind of guy who looks after people, and it's not Jared's fault he made the mistake of sleeping with someone who has feelings for him. Jensen's almost looking forward to class, just to have an opportunity to apologize, but when Jensen settles down in the front row, Jared turns around from a conversation with another student, goes pale, and ducks out the door. It's fifteen minutes past the starting bell when Misha walks in.
"Rider Padalecki isn't feeling well," he says. "I'll be instructing tonight, if someone would be so kind as to fill me in on what section you're covering?"
Jensen abruptly feels a lot worse.
When he stops by Jared's quarters to apologize, no one answers. Jensen waits for twenty minutes, but Jared doesn't come back, and even the infirmary doesn't yield anything. The next morning at breakfast, the other greens are clustered around a table, and when Jensen walks past them to get a tray, they all stare, whispering.
Luckily, there's no one else in line, so Jensen ignores them, filling a bowl with oatmeal. He's trying to decide between coffee and tea when Kristen bumps his shoulder.
"So Padalecki got in a fist fight with all the browns in second wing last night," she says, sort of conversational, and Jensen pauses with a hand half way to the mugs.
"Jared?" he says.
"When bronzes bond, it can lead to testosterone spikes," Kristen says, quietly, like she's saying something obvious. Jensen takes a mug.
"You mean mate," Jensen says, ignoring the way his face heats.
"Bond," Kristen says. "Look over your notes on behavior. They're not monogamous from a strict perspective, but some bronzes show permanent preferences, it's - you know the pair at West? The queen and the bronze?"
"No one else even flies for her," Jensen says, finally.
"You might want to talk to Jared before he gets into any more drunken brawls," Kristen says, dryly. "I'll take that."
Jensen nearly passes over his tray, then thinks better of it, filling another plate with food. It's probably better to go with a peace offering.
Jared doesn't open the door on the first knock, but Jensen isn't in the mood to quit. It's not long before he hears someone cursing their way across the room.
"What?" Jared says, yanking the door open, and Jensen shoves a shoulder in the door before Jared can slam it in his face.
"I thought you might be hungry," Jensen says, firmly, and waits while Jared stares.
Jared's room is dim, but he's not wearing a shirt, and it's easy for Jensen to see the bruises along his ribcage and over his stomach. When Jared pulls the door open further, Jensen realizes he has an impressive black eye. He's still scowling, an expression that's not entirely familiar, and he crosses his arms.
"We need to talk," Jensen says. Jared doesn't respond, but when Jensen looks more closely, he realizes that Jared's eyes aren't focused; Jensen pushes past him through the door and waits for him to finish arguing with Seraneth, setting down the tray of food on the table.
"You shouldn't be here," Jared says, finally. He's tense, barely holding himself in place, and he looks miserable. Jensen has to wrap his hands around a cup of coffee to keep from touching him.
"I wanted to apologize," Jensen says, awkwardly; he's never been good at this. "I was rude to you, and I'm sorry."
"I wasn't checking up on you," Jared bites out, finally.
"I can't do anything about Seraneth," Jensen says. "But I'm not expecting anything, I won't bother you."
"Bother me?" Jared says, but for the first time, he sounds curious instead of angry.
Jensen takes a deep breath and lets it out.
"I know that mating flights don't mean anything," he manages. "I didn't want to ask for more of your time or attention or - I'm not trying to be unprofessional."
Jensen stares firmly at his coffee cup, trying to ignore how warm his face feels and the way that Jared's probably looking at him. He tries not to jump when Jared sits down beside him, warm and too close.
"I wasn't checking on you," Jared repeats. He sounds tired. "You weren't asking too much. I - it's supposed to just be sex, it's always just sex, but I -"
"I never thought about it," he says. "You're smart and a decent guy and I've always liked being around you, but I never thought about it. And I was just - I didn't want it to be a bad experience, I didn't think it would be a big deal, it never -" Jared swallows. "But now I can't stop thinking about it. I showed up because I wanted to see you, I wanted -"
"To see me?" Jensen repeats, looking up, and realizes that Jared's even more flushed than he is.
"You're not the one who's being unprofessional," Jared says, which is when Jensen realizes what Jared's trying to say.
"You like me?" Jensen says, close to incredulous, and Jared looks away, reaching for a mug like he needs something to do with his hands.
"Yeah," Jared says, softly.
For a long moment, Jensen isn't sure, but when Jared rubs a hand over his face and starts to stand, it suddenly seems obvious.
"Sorry," Jared says, "I'll -" and Jensen leans in and kisses him. He feels Jared startle, jerking back, but Jensen wraps a hand around his wrist and pulls him back down, easing him into a longer, deeper kiss.
"Shh," Jensen says, against his mouth, and Jared finally gives in and kisses back, leaning into the hand Jensen has pressed against his face.
"I -" Jared says, finally, pulling back. Jensen follows, kissing him again, and when he finally stops to breathe, Jared's eyes don't leave his face.
"I've liked you for a while," Jensen admits, and Jared finally smiles.
"I should have, uh -" he says. "Talked to you. I can be a little -"
Stubborn, Seraneth says, and Jensen laughs.
"Bronzes," he says, finally, affectionately, "you're all the same," and leans in to kiss Jared, again.