Wiifest 2006
I knew black Friday would be insane, but not THIS crazy!
Originally, I was going to go to an EB games by my college campus. It was in walking distance, but I would have had to have gotten there around 8pm, and it wasn't opening until 7am. I found out the day before that ToysRUs was opening at 5am, so I proceeded to call the manager and ask her if the Wii was being sold ONLY in a bundle, or if we could just purchase the console. She told me that there was and OPTION of buying the bundle, but that it was PERFECTLY alright just to purchase the console. I was set :-). Wouldn't have to get there until around 10pm, and would have it by 5am. More sleep and Wii time.
Around 9:45pm, my friend Zach and I head over to ToysRUs with two giant Rockstars, a bag of Sunchips, some goldfish crackers, a bottle of $10 rum, two sleeping bags, and about five layers of clothes. It was going to be a long night.
We were the first to arrive at ToysRUs at 10pm. After waiting awhile, we decided no one was going to come yet, so we went to Dennys. We refueled via cheese fries and western burgers, and then went back. Upon out return, other cars were there but only three filled with people.
Zach and I amused ourselves for a few hours playing word games. In the other car, we saw about four people... And it looked like they were sexing. We found this hilarious, and weren't sure if they were Wii people or not. Since we weren't going to sex0rz to warm up, we decided it would be a good idea to take a shot of the nasty rum. Although it warmed us a bit, it was hardly worth it for the taste.
Zach then got out his guitar, went outside, and started to play. I had to pee, so I had to go behind ToysRUs and pee behind their building... Probably one of the most metal things I had ever done, peeing on a toy store. Upon my return, the sole male in the other vehicle came out with his bass guitar and began to talk to Zach and myself. His name was Gabe, and seemed like a cool dude. He gave Zach a cigarette, and I extended the offer of alcoholz to him and his lady friends. Two of the women in the car then left, and he explained that they just came to keep him company... Apparently, all four of them had massive sexing in the car, which I actually believe. After seeing it... Good times for him on Wiifest 2006.
After talking about how much Zelda was going to rock, and how Metriod should have stayed a launch game, and whether or not Trauma Center was going to be worth it... His friend 'Edgy' (I wasn't sure if this was some sort of nickname, a play on 'Angie', or me misunderstanding... But after all though hours, I could never figure it out) came out of the car and talked to us. She explained that she was just here for Gabe's company, and that she had nothing better to do. Zach explained that he was there for the same reason. So, at 1am, only two people were there for Wiifest 2006.
Around 1:30am, Gabe, Edgy, Zach and I decided that more rum was definitely needed, as it was getting much colder. Gabe's brother, Anthony, then arrived for both the Wii and the PS3, and also partook in the rum. There were now five buzzed, freezing cold Nintendo fans awaiting the arrival of 5am to cradle the must sought after Wii in their loving arms.
As expected, when 3am rolls around, more cars start showing up. Gabe, Edgy, Zach, Anthony, and I run toward the line and plant ourselves in our respective positions-- sleeping bags and energy drinks in hand. People started lining up, and telling us what they were there for. Some were there for Wiis, some for PS3s, and some for ToysRUs shopping sprees. (lawl rhyme) We bonded with a few more people in the line, but our core group stayed strong. At 3:30am, Edgy left to get some 7/11 coffee for her, Gabe, and Anthony, which made me realize how nice a warm beverage would be. Not willing to succumb to 7/11 coffee, I wished out loud that a 24 hour Starbucks existed. A women a few people behind me told me, Starbucks cup in hand, that there was one a few blocks down. Overcome with joy, I had Zach hold my place and went straight to the Mecca of all Starbucks. I ordered Venti espresso based drinks, and was on my way back. Zach and I were more than pleased for this warm liquid of the gods.
I had returned around 4am, and saw that a younger boy had joined our group. His name was Michael, and was Gabe's best friend's little brother. He has just turned 13, and seemed like a really cool kid. We all waited together in hopes that time would fly by faster, as we were extremely tired and in seriousness of food, sleep, and Wii time. At 4:30am, we see the manager ceremoniously remove the "Sold out of Nintendo Wii" sign, to which the now SIX of us gave a cheer.
A mere 15 minutes later, the manager comes out and ruins our excitement. Remember, we are hungry, sleep deprived, and have been waiting 6 hours and 45 minutes to get our Wii, only 15 minutes left, right? WRONG.
The manager comes out, and tells the Wii crowd that they do NOT have any because the shipment was screwed up, and it would be getting to that specific ToyRUs at 1pm. At this time, I AGAIN asked her if they would be selling the Wii in a bundle, or just the console. She, again, told me that there was an option of the bundle, but it would be fine to buy just the console. This was a deciding factor to me waiting another 8 hours for Wii goodness.
So, I decided to stay... But Zach and I had a problem. He needed to get home. At this point, the Wii line and the ToysRUs line had separated, and there were about seven people in our line. I really had to trust my new-found Wiifest '06 friends to hold my place... They said that after seven hours, we were now a team, and nothing would break us apart. So, I drove Zach home, used an actual bathroom, picked up my laptop and some choice DVDs (seasons 1-4 of Aquateen, complete set of the Super Mario World Super Show, and Season one of Space Ghost) and was on my way back.
Now... What to go for eight hours, right? We decided to bond with other people in the line, so we picked the three people behind us. There was Aaron, a senior at UCSD studying for his LSAT, and these two younger Mexican kids who never really told us their names, but filled the hours with conversation. After the bad news, Gabe, Edgy, and myself decided to drink more rum, as we were freezing our asses off and not excited about waiting another 8 hours in front of ToysRUs. We found ways to amuse ourselves... Including, but not limited to: Music, our Nintendo stories, stories from high school, and counting the number of people who asked us "what are you in line for?" or "is that the line to get in?" (this was my favorite... They'd see people walk in before them and ask that... God people are dumb.) At the end of the eight hours, well over 200 people asked us what we were in line for. We stopped counting after 100, but made sure to loudly applaud and cheer for the 100th person.
All tangents aside, (lawl, wordplay) it was all about the wait now. When the sun rose, we all cheered, but were upset that it didn't get ANY warmer. We were all already in a daze, and it was only 8am! Not to mention HUNGRY. Unfortunately, the line had grown, and there was NO food place to be seen in the vicinity of the store. We threw around the idea of Pizza Hut, but it wasn't open until 11pm (I guess food places do not operate on black Friday like stores do). The rules of console lines make it okay to go in the general area to get food, and/or use the restroom, AS LONG as you have an agreement with the person directly behind you. Luckily, no one was going to argue with the first FIVE people in line, as they were in the top twenty and guaranteed a Wii. So, I managed to weasel my way out of the line and into Cost Plus where I purchased some nasty corn syrup filled fruit drink for the purpose of mixing. If I couldn't eat, I might as well get my calories from alcohol. I returned with two bottles of the stuff, and had Edgy and Michael drink it 1/3 down so I could fill it with rum in my car.
Let me just say, at 8am, in front of a toy store, filling bottles with rum in my car has to be one of the coolest things I have ever done. Actually, no. DRINKING in front of a ToysRUS at 8am with children all around is the best thing I have ever done.
Anyway. Gabe, Edgy, and I drank all of this down for warmth and effect. For some reason, alcohol hits you differently at the break of dawn... We were buzzed for a good hour and a half. Unfortunately, around 9am the manager came out and told us, very rudely I might add, to move all of our blankets because "she had a business to run" and that we were "annoying her guests".
Let's analyze this for a moment. We were DEFINITELY not making a mess. A few of us had blankets and sleeping bags because it was around 30 degrees! (cold for California) Furthermore, we had been nothing but nice to the people entering and exiting the store. The ONLY contact we had with them was answering their question "why are you in line?" Finally...
Uh. We're her guests too. In fact, over 40 of us in the line were her guests. Guests that planned on spending a lot of money at the store she managed. She could have taken 40 seconds out of her day, that is, less than ONE second for each of us in her line to tell us what's going on.
This was just one of many of her unnecessary tirades on how we were ruining her business. It got SO bad that Gabe, Edgy, Michael, and I decided to call ToysRUs headquarters and make a formal complaint about this manager. Normally, I would have gotten the entire line to not purchase anything from this evil company, but I had invested WAY too much time into this NOT to get the prize at the bottom on the shit-filled box. Besides, I think it pissed her off that we were still standing there...
Around 10am, twelve hours into WiiFest 2006, one of the ToysRUs employees posts a sign that says "WiiBundle, Wii plus three games for $399.96!.. Now, why would they post this sign if you could also JUST buy the console? Furthermore, why didn't they post it before, or at 5am so they could warn all incoming shoppers? We were all very interested in this, so we sent Michael, the younger cuter one of us all, to inquire. He spoke directly to the manager that I had spoken to TWICE.
She told Michael that "the bundle is the ONLY way to buy the Wii; you can not buy JUST the console."
Yea. We were pissed. We had two more people go in and ask, including one much older guy (the ageism in this country sickens me), and we all received the same answer. We called headquarters again to file a complaint against this manager for LYING to us. Gabe actually complained so bad that he got to upper management and spoke to them, getting REAL answers. We were told that it was ToysRUs policy to sell the Wii in a bundle, but it didn't JSUT have to be games. We could spend it on anything Wii related-- Wiimotes, VC points cards, etc... As LONG as it totaled $399.96 plus tax.
We were all in a lot of shock... And very, very angry that we had been lied to. Gabe, Edgy, and I had been there for twelve hours, and most of the others had been there about six. It was the point of no return for most of us, and we resolved that we would be forced to purchasing one at the overly inflated price. Damn it.
To make matters even worse, they didn't even have the ONE game that I wanted other than Zelda, which I've had since launch date. Trauma Center was out... Also, the one I would have gotten on top of that, Marvel, was out as well. ToysRUs didn't have the sense NOT to sell the Wii games until it came in... Go figure. Furthermore, the Wii shipment was console only, no new Wiimotes or games. Lame.
Luckily, we can return the games for store credit to get Wiimotes or other games when they came in. Although, all of us just didn't want to spend $433 friggin dollars.
Next was a line of great disappointments. At 11am, we saw an ARMORED truck line pull up in front of ToysRUs. We figured that it WASN'T the Wii shipment, but would have been HILARIOUS if it was... Not to mention very exciting. It wasn't Wiis, so we went back to sitting and waiting. Any time we saw a FedEx, DHL, UPS, or any sort of delivery truck, we all stood up hoping it was the truck that would deliver us to Wii heaven. I made the joke that this is how Christians must feel about Jesus coming back, but are always disappointed.
Next, a DHL truck came and actually took BOXES out. We were all so excited... And were then told it wasn't Wiis :-(. This was around 11:30am, so we still had about an hour and a half to go. It was then that I realized that the Wii shipment might be late for the SECOND time. This pushed us ALL over the edge... Waiting for 15 hours was one thing, but 16??!?!?!? Not good times.
Almost directly after, a courier service came by. It was a van, but could comfortably fit upwards of 50 Wii consoles. We eagerly awaited the unveiling of its contents, but it was just a letter. We hoped it was a letter firing that manager...
At 12:30, we thought we saw the light. It was a FedEx truck, shining in the distance. We all stood up, eager to see its contents. We craned our necks forward to get a better look, hoping, PRAYING, that it was going to pull in front of or line. Mario would be the driver, jump out, and say "IT'S-A ME! MARIO! WIIs FOR EV-A-REE-ONE!!!" Then Kirby would fly about, dropping Wiimotes in everyone..s' hands, Samus would shoot nunchucks out of her gun, and Yoshi would lay eggs filled with choice game titles. Oh what a glorious day it would have been!
But, Alas...That is not what happened. It was tickle me Elmos, or some other worthless toy to be displayed and sought after by millions of spoiled American children. Not for the gamers who have saved up, and Craigslisted their lives away to afford the $250 Wii, that has has now been bumped up to $433. FUCK THEM.
The next fuck you was at 1:01pm, when the Wii shipment was officially late for the second time. Fifteen hours into Wiifest, there was NO turning back now. We were either getting a Wii today, or all hell was breaking loose. It would be the hungry, sleepless, gamers v. the tattooed on eyebrow-d Mexican workers. Game on, bitches.
The final blow to my proverbial balls was when the manager came out to tell us that the Wiis weren't coming in today. That it would be until Monday. Gabe, Edgy, Michael, and I were ready to pull her intestines from her rectum and hang her from that smiling giraffe. But, she did say she would put us on a list and call us when we came in to "be fair" but not to file ANY complaints. This makes me believe that she received a call from headquarters about the upwards of 15 complaints she received that day.
Gabe, Michael, and I put our names on the bitter sweetly put our names on the list. While we were guaranteed the Wii, it didn't seem the same to wait in line for 15 hours and 36 minutes without a Wii physically in hand. We said our goodbyes, grudgingly walked to our cars, and began to take of our jackets for the Wii-less drive back home.
I was texting a friend the sad news, and when I looked up from my phone, I saw a HUGE UPS truck parked out in front of ToysRUs. I jumped out of my car. Gabe was just backing out, so I flagged him down and he reparked-- both him and Michael jumping out of the car. We ran back to our spots in the line, and HOPED that this was the shipment. The manager said it probably wasn't, and went to check out what was in the shipment.
She talked to the UPS driver, turned toward the line, and nodded her head "yes" Gabe, Edgy, Michael, Aaron and I jumped and cheered, thanking the UPS guy, and applauding him for his wonderful service. They quickly unloaded the Wiis, and called us in three at a time. Gabe, Michael, and I were the first three in, and purchased the items at exactly 2pm, making it exactly a 16 hour adventure.
Tired, hungry broke and full of so many emotions, I came home with what I worked so hard for. Our grandparents may have had to walk 15 miles through the snow to get to school, but we had to wait 16 hours in front of a fascist corporation with a Nazi dictator manager for the most 1337 gaming system on the market.
It's Wii time guys!!!
Originally, I was going to go to an EB games by my college campus. It was in walking distance, but I would have had to have gotten there around 8pm, and it wasn't opening until 7am. I found out the day before that ToysRUs was opening at 5am, so I proceeded to call the manager and ask her if the Wii was being sold ONLY in a bundle, or if we could just purchase the console. She told me that there was and OPTION of buying the bundle, but that it was PERFECTLY alright just to purchase the console. I was set :-). Wouldn't have to get there until around 10pm, and would have it by 5am. More sleep and Wii time.
Around 9:45pm, my friend Zach and I head over to ToysRUs with two giant Rockstars, a bag of Sunchips, some goldfish crackers, a bottle of $10 rum, two sleeping bags, and about five layers of clothes. It was going to be a long night.
We were the first to arrive at ToysRUs at 10pm. After waiting awhile, we decided no one was going to come yet, so we went to Dennys. We refueled via cheese fries and western burgers, and then went back. Upon out return, other cars were there but only three filled with people.
Zach and I amused ourselves for a few hours playing word games. In the other car, we saw about four people... And it looked like they were sexing. We found this hilarious, and weren't sure if they were Wii people or not. Since we weren't going to sex0rz to warm up, we decided it would be a good idea to take a shot of the nasty rum. Although it warmed us a bit, it was hardly worth it for the taste.
Zach then got out his guitar, went outside, and started to play. I had to pee, so I had to go behind ToysRUs and pee behind their building... Probably one of the most metal things I had ever done, peeing on a toy store. Upon my return, the sole male in the other vehicle came out with his bass guitar and began to talk to Zach and myself. His name was Gabe, and seemed like a cool dude. He gave Zach a cigarette, and I extended the offer of alcoholz to him and his lady friends. Two of the women in the car then left, and he explained that they just came to keep him company... Apparently, all four of them had massive sexing in the car, which I actually believe. After seeing it... Good times for him on Wiifest 2006.
After talking about how much Zelda was going to rock, and how Metriod should have stayed a launch game, and whether or not Trauma Center was going to be worth it... His friend 'Edgy' (I wasn't sure if this was some sort of nickname, a play on 'Angie', or me misunderstanding... But after all though hours, I could never figure it out) came out of the car and talked to us. She explained that she was just here for Gabe's company, and that she had nothing better to do. Zach explained that he was there for the same reason. So, at 1am, only two people were there for Wiifest 2006.
Around 1:30am, Gabe, Edgy, Zach and I decided that more rum was definitely needed, as it was getting much colder. Gabe's brother, Anthony, then arrived for both the Wii and the PS3, and also partook in the rum. There were now five buzzed, freezing cold Nintendo fans awaiting the arrival of 5am to cradle the must sought after Wii in their loving arms.
As expected, when 3am rolls around, more cars start showing up. Gabe, Edgy, Zach, Anthony, and I run toward the line and plant ourselves in our respective positions-- sleeping bags and energy drinks in hand. People started lining up, and telling us what they were there for. Some were there for Wiis, some for PS3s, and some for ToysRUs shopping sprees. (lawl rhyme) We bonded with a few more people in the line, but our core group stayed strong. At 3:30am, Edgy left to get some 7/11 coffee for her, Gabe, and Anthony, which made me realize how nice a warm beverage would be. Not willing to succumb to 7/11 coffee, I wished out loud that a 24 hour Starbucks existed. A women a few people behind me told me, Starbucks cup in hand, that there was one a few blocks down. Overcome with joy, I had Zach hold my place and went straight to the Mecca of all Starbucks. I ordered Venti espresso based drinks, and was on my way back. Zach and I were more than pleased for this warm liquid of the gods.
I had returned around 4am, and saw that a younger boy had joined our group. His name was Michael, and was Gabe's best friend's little brother. He has just turned 13, and seemed like a really cool kid. We all waited together in hopes that time would fly by faster, as we were extremely tired and in seriousness of food, sleep, and Wii time. At 4:30am, we see the manager ceremoniously remove the "Sold out of Nintendo Wii" sign, to which the now SIX of us gave a cheer.
A mere 15 minutes later, the manager comes out and ruins our excitement. Remember, we are hungry, sleep deprived, and have been waiting 6 hours and 45 minutes to get our Wii, only 15 minutes left, right? WRONG.
The manager comes out, and tells the Wii crowd that they do NOT have any because the shipment was screwed up, and it would be getting to that specific ToyRUs at 1pm. At this time, I AGAIN asked her if they would be selling the Wii in a bundle, or just the console. She, again, told me that there was an option of the bundle, but it would be fine to buy just the console. This was a deciding factor to me waiting another 8 hours for Wii goodness.
So, I decided to stay... But Zach and I had a problem. He needed to get home. At this point, the Wii line and the ToysRUs line had separated, and there were about seven people in our line. I really had to trust my new-found Wiifest '06 friends to hold my place... They said that after seven hours, we were now a team, and nothing would break us apart. So, I drove Zach home, used an actual bathroom, picked up my laptop and some choice DVDs (seasons 1-4 of Aquateen, complete set of the Super Mario World Super Show, and Season one of Space Ghost) and was on my way back.
Now... What to go for eight hours, right? We decided to bond with other people in the line, so we picked the three people behind us. There was Aaron, a senior at UCSD studying for his LSAT, and these two younger Mexican kids who never really told us their names, but filled the hours with conversation. After the bad news, Gabe, Edgy, and myself decided to drink more rum, as we were freezing our asses off and not excited about waiting another 8 hours in front of ToysRUs. We found ways to amuse ourselves... Including, but not limited to: Music, our Nintendo stories, stories from high school, and counting the number of people who asked us "what are you in line for?" or "is that the line to get in?" (this was my favorite... They'd see people walk in before them and ask that... God people are dumb.) At the end of the eight hours, well over 200 people asked us what we were in line for. We stopped counting after 100, but made sure to loudly applaud and cheer for the 100th person.
All tangents aside, (lawl, wordplay) it was all about the wait now. When the sun rose, we all cheered, but were upset that it didn't get ANY warmer. We were all already in a daze, and it was only 8am! Not to mention HUNGRY. Unfortunately, the line had grown, and there was NO food place to be seen in the vicinity of the store. We threw around the idea of Pizza Hut, but it wasn't open until 11pm (I guess food places do not operate on black Friday like stores do). The rules of console lines make it okay to go in the general area to get food, and/or use the restroom, AS LONG as you have an agreement with the person directly behind you. Luckily, no one was going to argue with the first FIVE people in line, as they were in the top twenty and guaranteed a Wii. So, I managed to weasel my way out of the line and into Cost Plus where I purchased some nasty corn syrup filled fruit drink for the purpose of mixing. If I couldn't eat, I might as well get my calories from alcohol. I returned with two bottles of the stuff, and had Edgy and Michael drink it 1/3 down so I could fill it with rum in my car.
Let me just say, at 8am, in front of a toy store, filling bottles with rum in my car has to be one of the coolest things I have ever done. Actually, no. DRINKING in front of a ToysRUS at 8am with children all around is the best thing I have ever done.
Anyway. Gabe, Edgy, and I drank all of this down for warmth and effect. For some reason, alcohol hits you differently at the break of dawn... We were buzzed for a good hour and a half. Unfortunately, around 9am the manager came out and told us, very rudely I might add, to move all of our blankets because "she had a business to run" and that we were "annoying her guests".
Let's analyze this for a moment. We were DEFINITELY not making a mess. A few of us had blankets and sleeping bags because it was around 30 degrees! (cold for California) Furthermore, we had been nothing but nice to the people entering and exiting the store. The ONLY contact we had with them was answering their question "why are you in line?" Finally...
Uh. We're her guests too. In fact, over 40 of us in the line were her guests. Guests that planned on spending a lot of money at the store she managed. She could have taken 40 seconds out of her day, that is, less than ONE second for each of us in her line to tell us what's going on.
This was just one of many of her unnecessary tirades on how we were ruining her business. It got SO bad that Gabe, Edgy, Michael, and I decided to call ToysRUs headquarters and make a formal complaint about this manager. Normally, I would have gotten the entire line to not purchase anything from this evil company, but I had invested WAY too much time into this NOT to get the prize at the bottom on the shit-filled box. Besides, I think it pissed her off that we were still standing there...
Around 10am, twelve hours into WiiFest 2006, one of the ToysRUs employees posts a sign that says "WiiBundle, Wii plus three games for $399.96!.. Now, why would they post this sign if you could also JUST buy the console? Furthermore, why didn't they post it before, or at 5am so they could warn all incoming shoppers? We were all very interested in this, so we sent Michael, the younger cuter one of us all, to inquire. He spoke directly to the manager that I had spoken to TWICE.
She told Michael that "the bundle is the ONLY way to buy the Wii; you can not buy JUST the console."
Yea. We were pissed. We had two more people go in and ask, including one much older guy (the ageism in this country sickens me), and we all received the same answer. We called headquarters again to file a complaint against this manager for LYING to us. Gabe actually complained so bad that he got to upper management and spoke to them, getting REAL answers. We were told that it was ToysRUs policy to sell the Wii in a bundle, but it didn't JSUT have to be games. We could spend it on anything Wii related-- Wiimotes, VC points cards, etc... As LONG as it totaled $399.96 plus tax.
We were all in a lot of shock... And very, very angry that we had been lied to. Gabe, Edgy, and I had been there for twelve hours, and most of the others had been there about six. It was the point of no return for most of us, and we resolved that we would be forced to purchasing one at the overly inflated price. Damn it.
To make matters even worse, they didn't even have the ONE game that I wanted other than Zelda, which I've had since launch date. Trauma Center was out... Also, the one I would have gotten on top of that, Marvel, was out as well. ToysRUs didn't have the sense NOT to sell the Wii games until it came in... Go figure. Furthermore, the Wii shipment was console only, no new Wiimotes or games. Lame.
Luckily, we can return the games for store credit to get Wiimotes or other games when they came in. Although, all of us just didn't want to spend $433 friggin dollars.
Next was a line of great disappointments. At 11am, we saw an ARMORED truck line pull up in front of ToysRUs. We figured that it WASN'T the Wii shipment, but would have been HILARIOUS if it was... Not to mention very exciting. It wasn't Wiis, so we went back to sitting and waiting. Any time we saw a FedEx, DHL, UPS, or any sort of delivery truck, we all stood up hoping it was the truck that would deliver us to Wii heaven. I made the joke that this is how Christians must feel about Jesus coming back, but are always disappointed.
Next, a DHL truck came and actually took BOXES out. We were all so excited... And were then told it wasn't Wiis :-(. This was around 11:30am, so we still had about an hour and a half to go. It was then that I realized that the Wii shipment might be late for the SECOND time. This pushed us ALL over the edge... Waiting for 15 hours was one thing, but 16??!?!?!? Not good times.
Almost directly after, a courier service came by. It was a van, but could comfortably fit upwards of 50 Wii consoles. We eagerly awaited the unveiling of its contents, but it was just a letter. We hoped it was a letter firing that manager...
At 12:30, we thought we saw the light. It was a FedEx truck, shining in the distance. We all stood up, eager to see its contents. We craned our necks forward to get a better look, hoping, PRAYING, that it was going to pull in front of or line. Mario would be the driver, jump out, and say "IT'S-A ME! MARIO! WIIs FOR EV-A-REE-ONE!!!" Then Kirby would fly about, dropping Wiimotes in everyone..s' hands, Samus would shoot nunchucks out of her gun, and Yoshi would lay eggs filled with choice game titles. Oh what a glorious day it would have been!
But, Alas...That is not what happened. It was tickle me Elmos, or some other worthless toy to be displayed and sought after by millions of spoiled American children. Not for the gamers who have saved up, and Craigslisted their lives away to afford the $250 Wii, that has has now been bumped up to $433. FUCK THEM.
The next fuck you was at 1:01pm, when the Wii shipment was officially late for the second time. Fifteen hours into Wiifest, there was NO turning back now. We were either getting a Wii today, or all hell was breaking loose. It would be the hungry, sleepless, gamers v. the tattooed on eyebrow-d Mexican workers. Game on, bitches.
The final blow to my proverbial balls was when the manager came out to tell us that the Wiis weren't coming in today. That it would be until Monday. Gabe, Edgy, Michael, and I were ready to pull her intestines from her rectum and hang her from that smiling giraffe. But, she did say she would put us on a list and call us when we came in to "be fair" but not to file ANY complaints. This makes me believe that she received a call from headquarters about the upwards of 15 complaints she received that day.
Gabe, Michael, and I put our names on the bitter sweetly put our names on the list. While we were guaranteed the Wii, it didn't seem the same to wait in line for 15 hours and 36 minutes without a Wii physically in hand. We said our goodbyes, grudgingly walked to our cars, and began to take of our jackets for the Wii-less drive back home.
I was texting a friend the sad news, and when I looked up from my phone, I saw a HUGE UPS truck parked out in front of ToysRUs. I jumped out of my car. Gabe was just backing out, so I flagged him down and he reparked-- both him and Michael jumping out of the car. We ran back to our spots in the line, and HOPED that this was the shipment. The manager said it probably wasn't, and went to check out what was in the shipment.
She talked to the UPS driver, turned toward the line, and nodded her head "yes" Gabe, Edgy, Michael, Aaron and I jumped and cheered, thanking the UPS guy, and applauding him for his wonderful service. They quickly unloaded the Wiis, and called us in three at a time. Gabe, Michael, and I were the first three in, and purchased the items at exactly 2pm, making it exactly a 16 hour adventure.
Tired, hungry broke and full of so many emotions, I came home with what I worked so hard for. Our grandparents may have had to walk 15 miles through the snow to get to school, but we had to wait 16 hours in front of a fascist corporation with a Nazi dictator manager for the most 1337 gaming system on the market.
It's Wii time guys!!!