(no subject)
Well, I've stopped being pissed off like I was last night. I tried calling Mary twice today, but she didn't answer either time. I found out she was sleeping the first time, and I'm hoping that's why she wasn't there the second. What if she was just ignoring me?
I'd die.
I'm just really anxious now. I'm hoping this was an isolated incident, and that by tomorrow everything will be just fine again. Even if it is though, I know I'm going to have to bring this up with her and get this sorted out. I can't live thinking that she doesn't love me anymore.
But what if it's me that's stopped loving her? It's happened in the past. I've seriously... stopped loving Mary before. But every time I do, something keeps me from actually breaking up with her. And every time it happens, something happens that makes me realize how much I actually do love her.
I hardly consider yesterday conclusive evidence that she doesn't love me though. Just last Monday, we were yelled at for cuddling too much, by that stupid mean substitute that I've hated for years XD;; Normally, I wouldn't think too much of it, except that she got up to throw something away...
And came back to me, instead of walking around on the other side of Caitlyn's desk like I'd expect her to.
Maybe she was just mad at me for something on Saturday. Maybe I'm just imagining it. I don't know. But whatever it is, I'll find out tomorrow at school.
But am I ready to talk to her? Like I said before, I'm still incredibly scared and anxious about what's going to happen. Whatever.
Out.
I'd die.
I'm just really anxious now. I'm hoping this was an isolated incident, and that by tomorrow everything will be just fine again. Even if it is though, I know I'm going to have to bring this up with her and get this sorted out. I can't live thinking that she doesn't love me anymore.
But what if it's me that's stopped loving her? It's happened in the past. I've seriously... stopped loving Mary before. But every time I do, something keeps me from actually breaking up with her. And every time it happens, something happens that makes me realize how much I actually do love her.
I hardly consider yesterday conclusive evidence that she doesn't love me though. Just last Monday, we were yelled at for cuddling too much, by that stupid mean substitute that I've hated for years XD;; Normally, I wouldn't think too much of it, except that she got up to throw something away...
And came back to me, instead of walking around on the other side of Caitlyn's desk like I'd expect her to.
Maybe she was just mad at me for something on Saturday. Maybe I'm just imagining it. I don't know. But whatever it is, I'll find out tomorrow at school.
But am I ready to talk to her? Like I said before, I'm still incredibly scared and anxious about what's going to happen. Whatever.
Out.