Step Fifty-Four

[senseiseiichi]

...I'm getting much too thin. My clothes are starting to hang off of me, and I'm already in tiny sizes.

I'm following the doctor's instructions, and I eat like there's nothing holding me back. And it's junky stuff, food that I usually don't eat because it's not good for athletes. I shouldn't be losing this much, this fast. I'm just skin and bones,

Comments

Private to Inui

[senseiseiichi]

There's plenty of medication for it. I'm not worried even though it's still an experimental field-I've read everything that I can on the subject, and just as long as I keep on top of it, I'll be fine.

See...it sounds stupid, but my health and tennis are kind of linked. The only reason I agreed to go through all of the surgery in the first place was because where I was at the moment, I couldn't play. My greatest fear wasn't dying, it was living and not being able to play. I've gone as far as to tell people that I am tennis itself. Not giving my all when I can still fight...

I can't let this illness conquer me. That's admitting defeat.

Right now, I'm trying to gain weight by eating more. Not just healthy stuff, all of that sugary stuff that Sen likes (even though most of it makes me gag). And I'm not sure, but I'd probably have to take prednisone, and that's a corticosteroid. I'm pretty sure it's only anabolics that are banned, but I don't want to risk it until I know. And the side effects to prednisone are nasty.

I just wish I could get a good diagnosis, you know?

And I'm rambling. Forgive me.

Private to Yukimura

[dataphysics]

There is no need to forgive you, Yukimura. I am getting the impression that you have not been talking about this much. It might be that you need to let it out in some form.

Have you talked to the coaches? Perhaps there are exceptions for the medical steriods? You cannot know until you inquire.