The State of the Jen

[seinneann_ceoil]

Hello again,

I figured I should fill in the details of my life for those of you who have been asking, since I've been rather bad yet again about posting here. I'm not sure why, really, but perhaps it's due to a slight disconnect I've been feeling in general.

Comments

[auzure_skies]

I'm sorry you're feeling crappy, and all adrift. Weird how life can throw you these curve balls, eh? I remember having just graduated with my dance degree and going out - there - to try to work - somewhere, with someone. It was a very anchorless feeling. What I did was work for money (I was at Starbucks, but it sounds like you're in a better rent-paying profession - good for you!) and go to every audition I heard about, and attend every reputable workshop I could afford. My sister's been a self-supporting actor (only acting for her income) for about 5 years now, and she did the same thing. Did free gigs, went to every audition, and she went to every show she could afford and shmoozed with the actors/directors/crowds.

Sounds like you're more academic-focussed at the moment, but I just wanted to encourage you to keep on. This is the hardest time - just post school. A working artist sometimes has so many fingers in so many pies its hard to see the progress you're making. Just know that if you're working at your art, and getting yourself out there whenever you can, and connecting regularly with other artists, you'll get there. Hang in there. You're so talented, and you have so much heart and charisma.

And I can't wait to see you in December!! We will have delicious food and enjoy some of the great pubs in Montreal!

[auzure_skies]

I know that your post wasn't really about your music, but for some reason it all came out of me just now. If it doesn't resonate with you right now, feel free to discard it.

I do hope you feel better soon, and see you in two months!

[auzure_skies]

Holy crap. I just read behind the cut about your job - sorry for not reading everything before spewing artist advice - geez. I feel sheepish and silly - that wasn't really the advice you need right now.

I can't believe the work you're doing - I think people who work with violent children - especially ones who are nonverbal - are saint-like. How do you do it? How do you keep seeing the positive when the people you work with every day hurt you? I'm saying this with wonder and respect in my voice. You're doing such important work, and I really think it's amazing, and you're amazing.

Maybe when you're off for break you can do some more creative work. And remember that you're allowed to take time off at some point to follow your creativity, if you feel the need. Hugs!