Hearts, Stars, and Horseshoes....

[seideblume]

HAPPY ST. VALENTINE'S DAY!!!!

Today I acquired a new teddy bear (it's so soft!) and about 3 inches to my ass.  I expect another 3 to be put on in the near future as I devour all this candy.  I really didn't expect much today, as certain boys are usually quite clueless, but I guess he really is sweet!  Or maybe he just talked to Carson.

Most likely

Comments

Consider this your punishment

[federalduck]

I forgave the author of this note. The pink one in question, I mean, not you, Seideblume. Is was not the pinkest, gayest, piratiest, nor most irritating thing I received from her, or even received today. Other redeeming qualities of the note were that the author spelled the word 'stationery' correctly, it was not dated Feb. 14, it was in legible print (for a change), and it did not contain any possessive pronoun adjective followed by the word 'valentine'.

Also, I used a similar medium to ruin (attempt to ruin) this young woman's valentine's day with some less than happy statistics.

All five minutes I spent thinking about what you wrote were punishment.

[weaponnotspray]

The fact that your letter was the only thing I recieved was the second most depressing thing about yesterday.

Seideblume: I've seen his closet. He could quite possibly be hiding gay pirate accessories (such as Jolly Roger handbags) in there. He got rather teritorial when geekybandbabe started rooting through it. (Then again, if she started going through my closet, I'd be upset, too.)

You got it easy.

[federalduck]

In the end, I'd rather have received nothing on that terrible day than what all I got. You, weaponnotspray, got off lucky. Nobody thought little of you enough to smooch a letter and send it to you via school mail.

Furthermore, the new second most depressing thing about your Valentines Day should be that I didn't intend to give you that letter until today, eschewing the Valentines Day stigma attached with handwritten correspondence. (Goddamn, you'd think I of all people would know how to spell correspondence without alt+tabbing to Word to check.) While rewriting your list of Valentines Day woes, note that if I had known my letter would be the only thing you received I probably would have disposed of it post-haste.

You know what they say about discretion and valor? Well I deleted a paragraph here keeping that in mind.