blackened skies.
i miss alan so much!! we had to move out of the house within 3 days because chris had suspicion of 'narcotics' and sold the house so quickly. it's so strange being back at my parents house.. it gives me a really uncomfortable feeling of nostalgia that i don't enjoy at all. i need to stop going out so i can wake up and go to the labor pool, get another job, something, to get money fast and move out again. i just miss being around him everynite and just living with him.. he is such a beautiful person. i'm just trying to remain hopeful and not let my emotions overtake me.. but my heart feels empty. i just feel low but remembering that i'll see him again makes me feel a little comforted. my hearts BLEEDS for him. it just does. we were like two peas in a pod.. so content.. and like they say in party monster, have you ever heard of a pea leaving it's pod? no!
anyways, i need to take a shower and then go get a paper to look for places because i will see alan on tuesday and we are going to look for one. hopefully it will work out. then i have to go to work later.. ugh. i'm gonna get a job at time too.. in the am's.. 8.50 an house.. i can bust my ass for a pretty long time.. i know. i do what i gotta do. i hope alan is doing okay though, i'm sure he's alright.. he is a strong person. i'm almost done with my probation.. i had some green tea the other day at a party.. but no more again till i'm all done.. if even then.. about 2 more months. i don't really know what else to say right now.. i have things to do though... so, until next time, goodbye.
anyways, i need to take a shower and then go get a paper to look for places because i will see alan on tuesday and we are going to look for one. hopefully it will work out. then i have to go to work later.. ugh. i'm gonna get a job at time too.. in the am's.. 8.50 an house.. i can bust my ass for a pretty long time.. i know. i do what i gotta do. i hope alan is doing okay though, i'm sure he's alright.. he is a strong person. i'm almost done with my probation.. i had some green tea the other day at a party.. but no more again till i'm all done.. if even then.. about 2 more months. i don't really know what else to say right now.. i have things to do though... so, until next time, goodbye.