Long Weekend
The flat is fully deep-cleaned and death-decluttered. BB is calm. The past couple late nights, he's been telling me he's ready to go to his cage for the night by saying "Bye BB! I love you!"
Last weekend we saw "The Strangers: Chapter One", which was underwhelming. Had beers and lunch at the NoHo West Plaza. Monday, we played tennis.
I started swimming again, even though May in Southern California is cold and cloudy now, apparently. On Wednesday, I finished editing my 12th feature-length screenplay, my first horror script. I printed and punched it myself and used brads from Dad's desk to bind it.
Thursday was my only display of emotion since a day or so after Dad died (the first anniversary of which is next Thursday). Seems the only thing keeping me together was having full control over my home and no one threatening to kill my bird. Jesus fuck.
Currently...
Prioritising: Exercise. Monday and Thursday, upper body. Tuesday and Friday, abs/core. Wednesday and Saturday, leg day.
Listening to: Lana Del Rey posted the song "Tennessee Orange" by Megan Moroney in her story. I loved it. Should I start whipping around in my MX only blasting country music? 🤠
Watching: Two summery movies came out last autumn/winter and I didn't want to watch them then, so this weekend it is: "Night Swim" last night; "Saltburn" tonight.
Reading: The May issue of Southern Living.
Eating: Cut-up fruit from the grocery store sold in the little plastic containers. Cooking has not only become a chore due to my toxic stress, but sometimes, if I cook something, it tastes rancid, even if it's fine to Marvin. It's just the burnout, but when I'm that stressed, the only thing that I can eat is food prepared by someone else (which would have to be a restaurant). Even fresh fruit that I have to wash, peel, and cut up tastes rotten (when it's not). The plastic cups of fruit from the Ralphs deli are SO GOOD. When you just can't handle a common task due to stress and there's no one to help you or wait on you, you have to rely on conveniences. Feeling "ashamed" for using services like Amazon or banging on about plastic pollution are glaring examples of able-bodied ~privlege~.
Obsessing over: my HAG characters, Shawn and Courtney.
Last weekend we saw "The Strangers: Chapter One", which was underwhelming. Had beers and lunch at the NoHo West Plaza. Monday, we played tennis.
I started swimming again, even though May in Southern California is cold and cloudy now, apparently. On Wednesday, I finished editing my 12th feature-length screenplay, my first horror script. I printed and punched it myself and used brads from Dad's desk to bind it.
Thursday was my only display of emotion since a day or so after Dad died (the first anniversary of which is next Thursday). Seems the only thing keeping me together was having full control over my home and no one threatening to kill my bird. Jesus fuck.
Currently...
Prioritising: Exercise. Monday and Thursday, upper body. Tuesday and Friday, abs/core. Wednesday and Saturday, leg day.
Listening to: Lana Del Rey posted the song "Tennessee Orange" by Megan Moroney in her story. I loved it. Should I start whipping around in my MX only blasting country music? 🤠
Watching: Two summery movies came out last autumn/winter and I didn't want to watch them then, so this weekend it is: "Night Swim" last night; "Saltburn" tonight.
Reading: The May issue of Southern Living.
Eating: Cut-up fruit from the grocery store sold in the little plastic containers. Cooking has not only become a chore due to my toxic stress, but sometimes, if I cook something, it tastes rancid, even if it's fine to Marvin. It's just the burnout, but when I'm that stressed, the only thing that I can eat is food prepared by someone else (which would have to be a restaurant). Even fresh fruit that I have to wash, peel, and cut up tastes rotten (when it's not). The plastic cups of fruit from the Ralphs deli are SO GOOD. When you just can't handle a common task due to stress and there's no one to help you or wait on you, you have to rely on conveniences. Feeling "ashamed" for using services like Amazon or banging on about plastic pollution are glaring examples of able-bodied ~privlege~.
Obsessing over: my HAG characters, Shawn and Courtney.