Fic: Bring It On Home (2 of 10)

[fra_apples]

Title: Bring It On Home
Author: fra_apples
Length: ~8.000
Setting: Comics canon, post-After The Fall
Rating: R for violence and language, eventually NC17
Summary: A few months after the whole LA-in-hell thing is done, Spike and his friend the telepathic fish have some drinks. The fish convinces the vampire to take a trip to Scotland. This story is about what

Comments

[seapealsh]

Really good stuff here. Looking forward to what comes next.

[fra_apples]

Aw, thank you so much! Hope it won't disappoint, whenever I manage to finish it.

[thenewbuzwuzz]

I never realized Betta George was a fish! :D

[thenewbuzwuzz]

(cont'd)

"He didn’t know what she was thinking, and he couldn’t find the strength to look at her. In the next few seconds, he heard police sirens approach..."
aaaaa, the suspense!

"After a few moments, he started to slink away"
Spike, NO

“Don’t, or I’ll find you and before talking, I’ll kick your ass and tie you to a chair.”
I mean, that doesn't sound entirely bad

"they could clear the premise"
I think it's "premises" when it's a place

Mm, I see what you meant earlier, those paragraph breaks could be useful here.

They're going to be all right. <3

Yay! Lovely final line. :)

Good luck with the rest of the story! High time for this lost Spike to realize that people care about him. He's needed it for so long.

Anyway, good job, and I'm happy you joined us!

[fra_apples]

You are so incredibly kind for taking the time to let me know all these thoughts on the story. Thank you so much!
And thank you for pointing out those mistakes... I gotta pay more attention to pronouns, I'm afraid haha. Will edit them out, and edit a pic of Betta George in. That fish is definitely one of my favourite bits of the IDW comics, and one of my absolute favourite characters of the Buffyverse!
Thanks again for your time and kindness <3

[thenewbuzwuzz]

"and edit a pic of Betta George in"
Oh, no - I mean, you can, of course, but I didn't have any trouble picturing George once he was in the scene with Spike. What I meant was, I read a brief plot synopsis of every "After the Fall" issue, and THAT didn't clue me in he was a fish! :D Your story did just fine on that front.

I suspect it's easier for people who already know what "betta" means, plus, you do mention in the summary that Spike's friend is a telepathic fish! I just didn't make the connection between that and the name, until he entered the scene.

[nmcil12]

Sorry I can't read right now - have to read tomorrow or later tonight.

[fra_apples]

No worries at all! If and when you do, I hope you enjoy :)

[flowspuffy]

Wow, this is really great stuff

[fra_apples]

What a lovely comment! Thank you so, so much for being so kind and telling me what you liked about the story so far. Do keep on going like that, my ego doesn't mind at all. :D

[relurker]

This keeps being great. The dialogue with Betta George--my favourite comics character--is lovely, as is the conversation with Buffy.
Beautiful study of Spike's character and feelings, I think this piece is a keeper, to be read and re-read <3

[fra_apples]

Firstly - yes!! YES!! I'm so happy I'm not the one loving Betta George. That fish is absolutely gorgeous.
Secondly - wow. That is so very close to the highest praise I could ever conceive. Thank you so much, I have no words - only hugs!!