The Saga of a Beatdown
Once, long ago, back in the day when my Xbox 360 decided it liked running Halo 2 and wouldn't freeze every time I put it in the tray, I was playing some ranked games. On late evenings such as these, it was not uncommon to get "randomly" grouped with the same people over and over. On several games, I had the pleasure of playing games with Miss Beatdown, who totally mopped the floor with everyone there. I did pretty well, but I think the shock and awe if a girl who was good at this game (and so nice about it, unlike the chuckleheads I usually grouped with) got to me and later sessions weren't so well-played.
So, I did what I do with every great player I meet, and friended her. And I proceeded not to think about it for a while.
I guess this happens to her a lot -- if you want lots of attention, go into a realm of nerds and geeks and, literally, beat them at their own game. Which means she was fishing for it in the first place. Which means, automatically, I stop paying attention to you. Because that's what you want, and I'm not stupid enough to play into your hands!
(or wait, is that... UGH, stupid stupid stupid stupid!)
Anyway, Miss Beatdown likes sending voice messages to all of the people on her friends list, so by the time I get back to my inbox I'm spammed with like 20 messages. I just want to play some Halo against someone who's awesome, so I try to join a game that's open. I jump in there, and of the three of us, the one who isn't me or teh Beatdown was all like "who the hell is this guy?" Next thing I know, the match is invite only. Weird. So I check periodically, and it's just the two of them for at least a couple hours, I guess using the game setup as their own personal chat room (saves on long-distance charges, I guess!). Fine, you don't want to play? Forget you. I continue bolstering my rank.
More random messages keep flowing, telling tales of tears and dreama. Apparently, she had a bad breakup. Apparently she spent a lot of time at bars getting plastered and teasing poor, unsuspecting gents. Apparently she's trying out for American Idol, but apparently also she was turned down for being "too white". Apparently she's upset about this, so the next four messages are her singing some song, and each one very well (that's fine, there were singers who "made it" before Simon decided it was fun to humiliate people on TV).
And on and on and on.
Now the Miss Beatdown account is going away, so she's pointing people to the new account, her MySpace account, that sort of thing. So I'm like, yeah, I'll bite. And I check it out.
I established the following things:
1) Hot
2) She REALLY craves attention.
3) She's about 23
4) She lives in southern Wisconsin
5) She works in fucking GURNEE, IL (the city where Six Flags: Great America is, for you out-of-towners)
6) REALLY hot
I believe they call this nerd baiting.
Anyway, I guess she got bored of all the fanboy drama, because she announced she was starting to delete "friends" and start over. The last message I got was something like "15 people gone; I think I'm going to keep going.
And thus, a source of entertainment is lost, perhaps forever.
Thus... the saga ends.
...
...or has it?
...
...
Yeah, pretty sure that's done with.
~Sean
So, I did what I do with every great player I meet, and friended her. And I proceeded not to think about it for a while.
I guess this happens to her a lot -- if you want lots of attention, go into a realm of nerds and geeks and, literally, beat them at their own game. Which means she was fishing for it in the first place. Which means, automatically, I stop paying attention to you. Because that's what you want, and I'm not stupid enough to play into your hands!
(or wait, is that... UGH, stupid stupid stupid stupid!)
Anyway, Miss Beatdown likes sending voice messages to all of the people on her friends list, so by the time I get back to my inbox I'm spammed with like 20 messages. I just want to play some Halo against someone who's awesome, so I try to join a game that's open. I jump in there, and of the three of us, the one who isn't me or teh Beatdown was all like "who the hell is this guy?" Next thing I know, the match is invite only. Weird. So I check periodically, and it's just the two of them for at least a couple hours, I guess using the game setup as their own personal chat room (saves on long-distance charges, I guess!). Fine, you don't want to play? Forget you. I continue bolstering my rank.
More random messages keep flowing, telling tales of tears and dreama. Apparently, she had a bad breakup. Apparently she spent a lot of time at bars getting plastered and teasing poor, unsuspecting gents. Apparently she's trying out for American Idol, but apparently also she was turned down for being "too white". Apparently she's upset about this, so the next four messages are her singing some song, and each one very well (that's fine, there were singers who "made it" before Simon decided it was fun to humiliate people on TV).
And on and on and on.
Now the Miss Beatdown account is going away, so she's pointing people to the new account, her MySpace account, that sort of thing. So I'm like, yeah, I'll bite. And I check it out.
I established the following things:
1) Hot
2) She REALLY craves attention.
3) She's about 23
4) She lives in southern Wisconsin
5) She works in fucking GURNEE, IL (the city where Six Flags: Great America is, for you out-of-towners)
6) REALLY hot
I believe they call this nerd baiting.
Anyway, I guess she got bored of all the fanboy drama, because she announced she was starting to delete "friends" and start over. The last message I got was something like "15 people gone; I think I'm going to keep going.
And thus, a source of entertainment is lost, perhaps forever.
Thus... the saga ends.
...
...or has it?
...
...
Yeah, pretty sure that's done with.
~Sean