(no subject)
Let just start off with, I'm back. And you don't want to read my rant about whatever, or who and or what i want to married, or who i want to thank, or what i want, or what i need, who i want to bang, and such not, i suggesting that you stop reading and leave. Now. I guess i'll write in sentence form becuase, well, i guess i have alot to say. The past two days, i have been in car and up state at Suny Morrisville. I want to thank the person who made the thing call a CD player. It saves lifes. So on was 5 or 6 hour car ride to Morrisville, I slept. I read. I listened to music. Wow wasnt it fun. Whatever. Wow, I sure wish i was in college. EVeryone thought that i was. YAY! Well, sure. ON this trip i had ALOT of time to think. To think about everything thats gone on in my life. To think about everything thats going on in my life. It was hard. I just wanted to cry. Life just sucks. Isnt that just beautiful. I read Boy Meets Boy again. I'm almost done with it for the second time. It just wanted to cry for Paul. His friends are such losers. Its not his fault Kyle kissed him, and Pauls loves Noah, and Joni is madly in love with Chuck and Chuck is just playing her. And Joni hates Paul now for his trying to her to believe him that Chuck is a complete asshole. It was just sad. So my daddie is getting his knee surgery. Nor the nose. He has to wait until they do his heart. Emily i dont think hes getting bi-pass. I think its Open heart. Which i think is bi-pass. Could be. Could be not? Sure. I meant my brothers roommate. Wow. He looks like his 14. My age. And i saw the kid alot of times better on campus before i knew that he was my brothers new roommate. I was thinking about Jimmy. I dont know why. Alot was going through my head. We should hang out more. I only get one mre year with you. And even then, I wont see you alot. I find it amazing how people write. I was to bang the effin guy who created writting. Its amazing how words can be put dont onto paper, with a pen, or on a screen with a keyboard or what not. But I dont want to bang that guy who made writing with your hand. Why does it hurt so much when you write alot? Ugh? I was thinking about my sweet sixteen. Long time away. Yes, I know. I was think about what i was going to say for a sandle for Emily Marie. I'm not going to tell. But its sure is damn funnie. And i know what song toooo. Emily you better be surprized. I want to speak Japaineze. What a wonderful language. Sure? But if i do i know itll remind me of Wesley. I do miss that boy alot. Its almost been two years? And his birthday is coming up. I hope he is working at camp this year. Im too lazy to walk down there. Greg? Your working there? Is he there? I was this kid that look just like Wes. The same face shape, The same eyes, hair, and clothes, just that the hair wasnt blue. :( . It just brought tears to my eyes. I was almost literially crying. Thats how bad it was. I miss the odd days. I miss the everyday walks with emily to town. I miss the Deli. What is this? Market? Eww. And Patrick? What the hell? Emily is soo different now. We hardly talk to eachother anymore about life. Its just about the few days that pasted or coming up, or that day. I want it to become another Don and Kevin summer. That was a good summer. That was a Wesley Summer. Now Lets Cry. I've been thinking about kevin and sean and that whole group. Do i really want to see them? (no hard feelings to you guys) But i dont know. I havnet seen Kevin since, that one show, and emily would be here to enjoy that fact of seeing you again? What is this? Sean theres nothing against you. Nothing at all. I just dont know. Yes we have been talking alot and yes Sure? why not? Its going okay? Maybe? Or maybe thats just my head and mind playing games on me. Its conpletely driving me insane. I really dont know who i am in this world. Or who and what i want to be. Emily has totally picked me up and dropped me off with this old thing. What if i do get old and and im nothing. What if me and emily go different ways and never see or speak to eachother again. I miss emily rose. I want her back from camp. I have soooo Much to tell her. About life, my feelings, and kat. I dont think i want to go to the highschool. Yes i want to see the paople i havent seen in ages. and Yes i want to meet new people. But it scares me. What if everthing goes wrong and we all die. Im just stressing. and i dont like it. I have this words in my head. From when i was little to now. ABout my parents and about how i grew up. It was hard. I remember writing something hardful as my away message, and printing it out. My dad found it and asked me what was wrong. I totally forgot what it was about. But since than i've had werid thoughts and werid moods. Most of this is stupid and theres no point to it. When i was thinking in the car, I thought about how i was going to write something. I dont know where it would be. Maybe in here. Maybe no where. But it was good. But then i came to Lj. and I totally forgot what it was, and this entrie became horrible. Good night ladies and genltemen, thank you for reading my stupid no-point rant about life, and those who left earlie, well thank you for me no have to say sorry about wasting your time. Have a horrible day, now, Bye. :D