How Nature Says 'Revoke License'

[seal_clubber]

Heading up my List Of Things You Don't Want Hear From Your Taxi Driver:

1. "I'm going to make sure you hear every song on this Abba CD before this trip is over."
   
   
2. "Another successful right-hand lane change! We're on a lucky streak!"
   
   
3. "Here, play this tamborine."
   
   
4. "I'm not really crazy."

Nevertheless, I heard every one of the above on our taxi ride home from downtown Toronto last night, in what was arguably the most exciting taxi ride I have ever had (exciting in the "Please, God, don't let me die listening to Abba" sort of way).

Heading up my List of Things I Do Not Want my Taxi Driver to Do:

1. Play the tamborine while driving.
   
   
2. Store the tamborine under his feet (and brake pedal) while not playing the tamborine.
   
   
3. Take his hands of the wheel on the highway to clap along with Abba.
   
   
4. Focus all attention on the CD player while doing 120 kph around a curve, taking one hand off the wheel to pound on the dashboard in an attempt to make the CD stop skipping.
   
   
5. Estimate the incline of an on-ramp to be 60 degrees, and, when doubt is expressed to that figure, to respond with, "Well excuse me, Sir Isaac Newton".
   
   
6. Mistake left for right. Several times.

We went to see the Blue Man Group last night. And yet, I suspect that, when my in-laws get home to Norway, they will spend less time saying "We saw a neat show in Toronto" than "We had this one totally insane cab driver in Toronto".