(no subject)
I'm staying strong even if it kills me... and it won't, because people don't die from shit like this. it hurts like hell, sure, but it doesn't kill you.
So, yeah. At least I didn't get depressed this morning. Just... not normal, just kinda sad and tired and I can feel my eyes swollen (I'm probably, without even knowing, not wanting to cry so they are swollen because of that). Just... how patethic is it, that when I hear a song now, and it says something like "I'll do whatever it takes, to you around, I what's at stake, I know that I've let you down" (or something like that), stupid Lifehouse with their songs that touch me, it just... it kills me that if the ass were to call right the fuck now and tell me that okay, he'll come back in a year or two or three, I would probably almost definitely take him and all the fucking stupid things that come with that. HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT?
*swallows*
I wanna write, even if it kills me, if I actually know it'll hurt and I'll end up crying even as I type, but i wanna write because... it's like an exorcism of something that's lodged deep inside and I just gotta get it out, you know?
So, yeah. At least I didn't get depressed this morning. Just... not normal, just kinda sad and tired and I can feel my eyes swollen (I'm probably, without even knowing, not wanting to cry so they are swollen because of that). Just... how patethic is it, that when I hear a song now, and it says something like "I'll do whatever it takes, to you around, I what's at stake, I know that I've let you down" (or something like that), stupid Lifehouse with their songs that touch me, it just... it kills me that if the ass were to call right the fuck now and tell me that okay, he'll come back in a year or two or three, I would probably almost definitely take him and all the fucking stupid things that come with that. HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT?
*swallows*
I wanna write, even if it kills me, if I actually know it'll hurt and I'll end up crying even as I type, but i wanna write because... it's like an exorcism of something that's lodged deep inside and I just gotta get it out, you know?