[Video] /Backdated to yesterday
[The Forge clicks on, angled perfectly to the center of the room. A bedroom, actually. Note the bed? Yeah, I thought you did. Can’t miss it, really, not with the candles burning near it. Oh, and are blankets straightened? Maybe even -gasp-washed? ]
[Fuck no. They’re still tangled up and wrinkled. But hey. At least they’re candles.]
[It’s at this point that John walks into the view, carrying a book. Is he reading it? No. But he’s pretending to (with it upside down in his hands), and that’s more effort than he normally puts into things.]
Bored. I bet I could go save more orphans from the tyrannical pirate-bananas in the ruins. Oh, and puppies. Baby puppies. Because that’s the shit that good, amazingly-well-endowed guys like me do in our free time, right? Huh?
[And then, he falls over. Boom. Falls right over on the floor. He starts gyrating on the floor, some mixture of The Worm and fucking moves. Lots of hip thrusting. In time.]
Help! Help! I’m having a seizure! SEIZURE! Oh, this sucks something awful! I can’t stop moving! SEIZURE, MOTHERFUCKERS, DO YOU SPEAK IT!?
[It might be something frightening if he wasn’t rattling off his address and his requirements of “one medical personnel with punk-pink hair and less boobs than he normally digs” to come help him. ]
Oh, and bring Top Hats for Mr. Awesome!
[Eventually, the Forge runs out.]
[Fuck no. They’re still tangled up and wrinkled. But hey. At least they’re candles.]
[It’s at this point that John walks into the view, carrying a book. Is he reading it? No. But he’s pretending to (with it upside down in his hands), and that’s more effort than he normally puts into things.]
Bored. I bet I could go save more orphans from the tyrannical pirate-bananas in the ruins. Oh, and puppies. Baby puppies. Because that’s the shit that good, amazingly-well-endowed guys like me do in our free time, right? Huh?
[And then, he falls over. Boom. Falls right over on the floor. He starts gyrating on the floor, some mixture of The Worm and fucking moves. Lots of hip thrusting. In time.]
Help! Help! I’m having a seizure! SEIZURE! Oh, this sucks something awful! I can’t stop moving! SEIZURE, MOTHERFUCKERS, DO YOU SPEAK IT!?
[It might be something frightening if he wasn’t rattling off his address and his requirements of “one medical personnel with punk-pink hair and less boobs than he normally digs” to come help him. ]
Oh, and bring Top Hats for Mr. Awesome!
[Eventually, the Forge runs out.]