25. [Video]
Hey bitches!
[Behold a screenful of Jennifer's lovely, and lovingly made up, face. Her hair is perfect, her skin is perfect, her eyes are sparkling and she's got cherry red lips, currently being licked by her very own tongue. She wiggles her eyebrows.]
So, I understand there's been some funny rumors or talk or whatever about yours truly. As it happens, I am five miles beyond fine. In fact I haven't felt so good in weeks. Like, before the whole sad encounter with a sword. Which, by the way, totally uncool. [She gives the screen a very disapproving look.]
It's never appropriate to go around chopping heads off, fuckers.
But whatever. Getting disemboweled sure ruined my favorite shirt so what I'm getting at here is, who wants to go shopping with me? It could be like, some kind of badass girls' night out! Girls who have trouble attracting male attention? You are especially invited to Jennifer's "This Is How You Dress" seminar. And by seminar I mean "trip to Jennifer's favorite boutique." I will set you up pushup bras and lacy undergarments and miniskirts that will attract all the attention you need. Unless you don't have a hot body. Then we focus on the cleavage because, let's face it, guys are like, total dogs and distracted by shiny headlights.
Anyway, anyone interested? All girls invited! No guys allowed. Hope, you can come if you want. As long as you don't mind wearing pink.
[Private to Riful and Luciela]
I'm bored. Anyone up for a hunt? Bet I can lure a few horny rich guys into the ruins.
[Behold a screenful of Jennifer's lovely, and lovingly made up, face. Her hair is perfect, her skin is perfect, her eyes are sparkling and she's got cherry red lips, currently being licked by her very own tongue. She wiggles her eyebrows.]
So, I understand there's been some funny rumors or talk or whatever about yours truly. As it happens, I am five miles beyond fine. In fact I haven't felt so good in weeks. Like, before the whole sad encounter with a sword. Which, by the way, totally uncool. [She gives the screen a very disapproving look.]
It's never appropriate to go around chopping heads off, fuckers.
But whatever. Getting disemboweled sure ruined my favorite shirt so what I'm getting at here is, who wants to go shopping with me? It could be like, some kind of badass girls' night out! Girls who have trouble attracting male attention? You are especially invited to Jennifer's "This Is How You Dress" seminar. And by seminar I mean "trip to Jennifer's favorite boutique." I will set you up pushup bras and lacy undergarments and miniskirts that will attract all the attention you need. Unless you don't have a hot body. Then we focus on the cleavage because, let's face it, guys are like, total dogs and distracted by shiny headlights.
Anyway, anyone interested? All girls invited! No guys allowed. Hope, you can come if you want. As long as you don't mind wearing pink.
[Private to Riful and Luciela]
I'm bored. Anyone up for a hunt? Bet I can lure a few horny rich guys into the ruins.