How could we get lost running in a straight line?
Its amazing how much can go wrong in 72 short, yet painfully long, hours. Your whole world can fall apart. You feel yourself falling backwards, but there's no one there to catch you. I know I'm losing my balance...
Jonny is in jail now. He'll be there for a while, until his court date. We're keeping our fingers crossed that his charges will get dropped, but I won't get too hopeful so as to not be too crushed if things fall even more to shit. I'm going to visit him again tomorrow at four, and hopefully we both won't cry as much as we did Wednesday.
My band in going behind my back to find a new bassist, apparently. I wouldn't mind so much if weren't for the "behind my back" thing. I'm just tired of people I trust lieing to me and stabbing me in the back. There's been too much of that in the past few months and I just can't take much more of it.
I don't feel like I have any real friends anymore. Everyone has gone off and gotten their own lives and I'm stuck at the starting line alone, wondering where everyone went. I don't really know what to do, and I'm not upset that everyone has moved on, I just don't understand why I haven't. I'm lonely and defeated, and I don't even have Jonny to depend on right now. Just myself, and I'm realizing I'm not as trust-worthy and stable as I thought.
Tampa was supposed to be the answer to all my problems. I was supposed to pull myself out of my depression here, and things have bakfired. Jonny is in jail, my band doesn't trust that I'll keep my promise, my friends have their own lives and little time for me anymore, I'm sick all the time and stressed...life just plain and simple sucks right now. I'd say I don't think it could get any worse, but I don't want to jinx myself. I have bad enough luck as it is.
Jonny is in jail now. He'll be there for a while, until his court date. We're keeping our fingers crossed that his charges will get dropped, but I won't get too hopeful so as to not be too crushed if things fall even more to shit. I'm going to visit him again tomorrow at four, and hopefully we both won't cry as much as we did Wednesday.
My band in going behind my back to find a new bassist, apparently. I wouldn't mind so much if weren't for the "behind my back" thing. I'm just tired of people I trust lieing to me and stabbing me in the back. There's been too much of that in the past few months and I just can't take much more of it.
I don't feel like I have any real friends anymore. Everyone has gone off and gotten their own lives and I'm stuck at the starting line alone, wondering where everyone went. I don't really know what to do, and I'm not upset that everyone has moved on, I just don't understand why I haven't. I'm lonely and defeated, and I don't even have Jonny to depend on right now. Just myself, and I'm realizing I'm not as trust-worthy and stable as I thought.
Tampa was supposed to be the answer to all my problems. I was supposed to pull myself out of my depression here, and things have bakfired. Jonny is in jail, my band doesn't trust that I'll keep my promise, my friends have their own lives and little time for me anymore, I'm sick all the time and stressed...life just plain and simple sucks right now. I'd say I don't think it could get any worse, but I don't want to jinx myself. I have bad enough luck as it is.