*hurts*

[scarredbutalive]

In Februari 2009 my fiance since 2 years disapeared. He had a bi-polar disorder. He drank over 7 liters of vodka and whiskey in one single week. He threatened me. Looked me out of our apartment. Threatened my father. Disapeared. I got a new apartement. A new life. I went on. But with nightmares. Nightmares of me standing in the yard of my work-

Comments

[scarredbutalive]

Thank you. It seems insignificant to only say that, since it cannot clearly explain how much your words makes an impact on me. It feels wonderful (and that may sound strange, and is probably not the right word to use) that somewhere in the world there is someone who actually understands how I feel. Someone who can explain in words better than myself how I feel. I sincerely wish that I could help you as well, even if it might be difficult since I have such trouble to explain myself in english. But I can try, if you want.
You are not wrong and you are not babbling. You hit the spot right on. Teetering on the brink is something I have done myself several times. I have not gone over. My time with my ex thaught me many things about myself, and the time since he disapeared as well. It is not funny, it is not nice, but I have learned, and grown stronger in the learning-process.
You write a lot. You pour yourself into what you write. As I see it, you work with yourself by writing. I work with myself by reading and fantasizing. I only wish I too could write it as well as you do.

Many thoughts come to me by reading your fics. Some hurt, others don´t, many make me laugh. Many thougths about friendship come to me. I wish for the comaradice many of your fics show. I wish for the openness some of them show.

Again. Thank you.