Something HORRIBLE followed by something WONDERFUL...

[sbertie]

Okay... I went into my friend's classroom today. She teaches Marine Bio and had a poster with THIS disgusting animal featured on it...



AAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! Oh my god, WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? It's a DOLPHIN. A river dolphin, she tells me. NO. NONONNONONONONONONONO. Dolphins are beautiful, graceful creatures that make you smile and laugh because of their playful antics. And they jump a lot. THIS IS NOT ANY OF THOSE THINGS. It's like, I don't know, a giant penis-shaped turd with a beak. And big flippers. God took a crap and called it a dolphin. INTELLIGENT DESIGN MY ASS.

So... to cheer us all up...

THAT'S RIGHT PEOPLE, ALL YOU MOCKERS....

THE MAN...

THE LEGEND...

THE JEWISH ELVIS...

NEIL FUCKING DIAMOND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!







OH NEIL, YOU ARE A LYRICAL GENIUS!!!

"I am," I said
To no one there
An no one heard at all
Not even the chair
"I am," I cried
"I am," said I
And I am lost, and I can't even say why
Leavin' me lonely still

SERIOUSLY!!!! That's some deep existential shit, there.

LOL, okay, maybe you weren't really ready for that. I'll give you guys some real music soon...