And when she grows up she can become a rich man's mistress and never have to work a day in her life!
So, my brother calls me today. It went something like this...
Him: I just realized that I regret something.
Me: OMG?!
Him: Yeah... I really regret not telling you something.
Me: What?
Him: I regret that when the baby was born, and you came to the hospital, I WISH that I had told you that we had named her Gigi. I mean, that was the PERFECT opportunity to fuck with you and now it's gone forever.
Me: You're a fucking retard. THAT'S what you regret? I thought this was going to be something touching.
Him: And even when we have another baby, I won't be able to do it then, because now you'll be expecting it.
Me: I hate you.
TOUCHING RIGHT? ha, I love my brother so much. Sometimes, we make each other laugh so hard that we're literally crying and I will admit that once I even peed a little in my pants. After that heart-felt exchange, it went on to him telling me how he's getting one of those flat-screen TVs that go over the mantle and have an "art screen" that covers it when not in use so it looks like a painting. I, of course, totally LAUGH MY ASS OFF at how retarded this sounds, and ask him what the painting is going to look like...
Him: Well, you remember those Nagel prints?
Me: WHAT? You mean from the 80s? Like that Duran Duran album?!
in case you weren't conscious in the 80s:
Him: Yeah, like that. It's a painting of this woman with really white skin-
Me: OMG that's INSANE, your house is going to look like a set from Miami Vice OMG YOU'RE FUCKING WITH ME, RIGHT?
Him: Of course I'm fucking with you. Who mentions NAGEL without fucking with another person?
Family. Sigh. Anyways. Thanks to everyone who commented on yesterday's post. Your comments totally made me lol and feel quite a bit better. And to anyone who didn't comment, fuck off. LMAO JUST KIDDING. Sorta. What can I say? I'M A LITTLE NEEDY LATELY.
And to end this on a non-pathetic note... I got an email confirming that my tickets to an upcoming show are in the mail. What show, you ask? Rufus Wainwright at the Hollywood Bowl. And not just Rufus Wainwright, but him recreating Judy Garland's Carnegie Hall concert. OMG SERIOUS RUFUS WAINWRIGHT DOING JUDY FUCKING GARLAND. That's right, it's going to be a total gaytacular. I cannot wait to see what that audience is going to look like, LMAO.
Him: I just realized that I regret something.
Me: OMG?!
Him: Yeah... I really regret not telling you something.
Me: What?
Him: I regret that when the baby was born, and you came to the hospital, I WISH that I had told you that we had named her Gigi. I mean, that was the PERFECT opportunity to fuck with you and now it's gone forever.
Me: You're a fucking retard. THAT'S what you regret? I thought this was going to be something touching.
Him: And even when we have another baby, I won't be able to do it then, because now you'll be expecting it.
Me: I hate you.
TOUCHING RIGHT? ha, I love my brother so much. Sometimes, we make each other laugh so hard that we're literally crying and I will admit that once I even peed a little in my pants. After that heart-felt exchange, it went on to him telling me how he's getting one of those flat-screen TVs that go over the mantle and have an "art screen" that covers it when not in use so it looks like a painting. I, of course, totally LAUGH MY ASS OFF at how retarded this sounds, and ask him what the painting is going to look like...
Him: Well, you remember those Nagel prints?
Me: WHAT? You mean from the 80s? Like that Duran Duran album?!
in case you weren't conscious in the 80s:
Him: Yeah, like that. It's a painting of this woman with really white skin-
Me: OMG that's INSANE, your house is going to look like a set from Miami Vice OMG YOU'RE FUCKING WITH ME, RIGHT?
Him: Of course I'm fucking with you. Who mentions NAGEL without fucking with another person?
Family. Sigh. Anyways. Thanks to everyone who commented on yesterday's post. Your comments totally made me lol and feel quite a bit better. And to anyone who didn't comment, fuck off. LMAO JUST KIDDING. Sorta. What can I say? I'M A LITTLE NEEDY LATELY.
And to end this on a non-pathetic note... I got an email confirming that my tickets to an upcoming show are in the mail. What show, you ask? Rufus Wainwright at the Hollywood Bowl. And not just Rufus Wainwright, but him recreating Judy Garland's Carnegie Hall concert. OMG SERIOUS RUFUS WAINWRIGHT DOING JUDY FUCKING GARLAND. That's right, it's going to be a total gaytacular. I cannot wait to see what that audience is going to look like, LMAO.