wow
so this week im going to be uber busy ...and maybe thats a good thing to get my mind of some things that have been dwelling up their for some time.
I i have self respect, maybe hwat im doing right now, will hurt me one of these fine day...but for now im not trying to look in the future. Im trying to see in the present. and i guess, this is what i want. Welll actually, thats a slight lie. I want a relationship...but im to coward to say it or to go out and get it. and thats for many unsiad reasons i dont wish to uncover this late at night and this boozed up. Maybe i am insecure and think little of myslef, but i try to see myself in a better light-as a good person. To place myself around people who care and love me for who i am without any fancy garbage. And i think a lot of my friends do that for me. I thank you chris and ashley and Lauren and Alyssa-fuck commas-. AShely-i love her so much, she makes me feel whole again. i cant even say how much i owe gratitude towards her-i odnt even know if she knows how much i really love her. <33 Kevin kevin kevin, wow idk. Im taking a break from him for a bit for certain reasons hah.But he sees me in a diff. light thatn anyone else (not better, just different.) he sees me not in a category or a type or maybe jsut a women with breasts lol chirs will agree.
but, hes such a dif person that i have ever met and thats what partly drives me towards him. Maybe its also cause he legally insane...ahah seriosuly. thats also drives me off the roof. lol yUP>
hes a crazy ass kid who has much love for everyone and everything. He understands theri is grey areas i.e open minded. whenim with him, he makes me feel like im on a island vacation or out on a calm sea. LUCID.
i just wish that i could change his ways, or change his mind about me. and thats where i have iven up and realized-im just not the girl to do it.
i need something ive been searching for and cannot find. I know now, its not with kevin...but OHhhhh... how i wish it was. i wish for days. Id dance a thousand steps to get him back in my arms. "i would launch a thousand ships to bring your heart back to my island as the sand beneath me slips as i burn up in your presence." IG
caitlin
peace easy
namaste`
I i have self respect, maybe hwat im doing right now, will hurt me one of these fine day...but for now im not trying to look in the future. Im trying to see in the present. and i guess, this is what i want. Welll actually, thats a slight lie. I want a relationship...but im to coward to say it or to go out and get it. and thats for many unsiad reasons i dont wish to uncover this late at night and this boozed up. Maybe i am insecure and think little of myslef, but i try to see myself in a better light-as a good person. To place myself around people who care and love me for who i am without any fancy garbage. And i think a lot of my friends do that for me. I thank you chris and ashley and Lauren and Alyssa-fuck commas-. AShely-i love her so much, she makes me feel whole again. i cant even say how much i owe gratitude towards her-i odnt even know if she knows how much i really love her. <33 Kevin kevin kevin, wow idk. Im taking a break from him for a bit for certain reasons hah.But he sees me in a diff. light thatn anyone else (not better, just different.) he sees me not in a category or a type or maybe jsut a women with breasts lol chirs will agree.
but, hes such a dif person that i have ever met and thats what partly drives me towards him. Maybe its also cause he legally insane...ahah seriosuly. thats also drives me off the roof. lol yUP>
hes a crazy ass kid who has much love for everyone and everything. He understands theri is grey areas i.e open minded. whenim with him, he makes me feel like im on a island vacation or out on a calm sea. LUCID.
i just wish that i could change his ways, or change his mind about me. and thats where i have iven up and realized-im just not the girl to do it.
i need something ive been searching for and cannot find. I know now, its not with kevin...but OHhhhh... how i wish it was. i wish for days. Id dance a thousand steps to get him back in my arms. "i would launch a thousand ships to bring your heart back to my island as the sand beneath me slips as i burn up in your presence." IG
caitlin
peace easy
namaste`