The start of a new me?
So, i am really excited to start journaling online. I hope it can help me soothe my need to start over and build up a better self image. Recently my life mas become difficult in many ways and the need to vent becomes more clear.
This year has been going rather well compared to the last one, the only big thing is having my grandpa around. He doesn't like me and I can't really say I like him either, which yes, I know is sad, but true. After spending a summer with him I have discovered that he is no longer my grandpa but more like a child I babysit. (He's 82 and can't take care of himself and now has pre-Alzheimers) But it's ok. My sister is leaving for college soon and I'm slightly thrilled. She and I share a room (ugh) and I hate it! Not only does she keep it a royal pigsty, but she likes to keep the door closed and sit in there so when I go to bed it is horridly hot and unbearable (and smelly). Lets see, my mom and I still go 'round and round' with eachother but not as bad. She resents me and I can see it though she disagrees, after 7th grade our relationship will never be the same.
Speaking of relationships... I have had one 'relationship' this year but it was a big lie really. This kid likes me so we 'went out' but he wasn't ready from his previous one so he broke up with me a few days before winter formal. That jackass. But I did get my first kiss, with another guy... who had a girlfriend. And yeah, she now hates me, but it wasn't my fault he cant keep his lips off others. I hope to find a real guy though. I have my eye on one and we're friends and I'm pretty sure another likes me. But I still can't get over my obsession for a guy... he's GORGEOUS. And now I'm writing a book about it. So I hope someday I can conjure up the guts to actually ask him to use his real name (only his first name) but I'm very hesitant. We met at camp and he's an adult...and I'm not :'( So if he's reading this and can figure it out: can I use your name? Anyway, I'm gonna journal more, cuz I like it and I have WAY more to say!