(no subject)
Dear God,
Thank you for the strength to get through another day without him. Thank you God for the grace you've given me to be able to look at him and smile through all the pain. Dear Lord I thank you for the ablilty to hide my pain behind a smile. You know God that I need you now more than ever I need your strength and your wisdom and your grace to get me through this. You know that I love him so much and that each day without him is like a day with only half of myself. Lord I feel like im continuously walking around disconnected from the world. Like im in a bad dream and Im going to wake up at any moment. Lord there are days when I wish this was all a dream and I would wake up in him loving arms. Father I still believe that he is a wonderful person and that he does care about me. I know that this happened for a reason Lord and I trust in you but God why.. Why me why now? why with him? He is my soul mate God why did you take us away from one another. I know that I need to stop asking why and let you lead me to my answer, but Im sorry God you know im impatient.. I just dont know why you let me be happier than Ive ever been for 2 1/2 years with this man and then he gets taken away from me.. Lord noone will ever love him as much as I do.. No woman will ever be able to love him like that God because you know that I loved him unconditionally. Dear God I pray that you help me get over being mad at you for this because I know in my heart that you only did what is best for me but right now its hard. To dream of him and his I love you Shelly's and the Till death do us part dreams haunt me.. God if you want me to let him go God take the dreams away, but if for some reason im suppose to hold on to him Lord if there is a reason that I need to think about him and miss him and still Love him more everyday then show me the reason. Are we going to be led back to each other? Did we just have to grow as individuals first? Will he be my husband one day Lord please make these answers clear to me so that I can know wheather or not the torture will have a reward.. Father I pray for him to be happy, that he gets everything that he wants in life, Lord keep your hand on his shoulder and lead him in the way you want him to go. Do the same for me Lord and I know that if we are meant to come back to each other then we will.. I know God that I have to go through this for a reason and even though I may not know what that reason is you do and you know whats best for me.. Lord I give you my life in service. Show me God where you want me to go and what you want me to do and I will do this. Lord Im tired of running from you and what you want of me.. Lord I know that youre calling me to do something and I have been running from this call for quite sometime now. God you win take my life Lord and use me to your glory. Show me what you want of me. Lord I just pray that in the end you bring David and I back together becasue God I love him more than I love myself and I love his family just like they were my own and I know God that the reason that we are not together right now is that I wanted to do things my way and not let you lead. Well Father, the drivers seat is all yours show me God. Show me.
Thank you for the strength to get through another day without him. Thank you God for the grace you've given me to be able to look at him and smile through all the pain. Dear Lord I thank you for the ablilty to hide my pain behind a smile. You know God that I need you now more than ever I need your strength and your wisdom and your grace to get me through this. You know that I love him so much and that each day without him is like a day with only half of myself. Lord I feel like im continuously walking around disconnected from the world. Like im in a bad dream and Im going to wake up at any moment. Lord there are days when I wish this was all a dream and I would wake up in him loving arms. Father I still believe that he is a wonderful person and that he does care about me. I know that this happened for a reason Lord and I trust in you but God why.. Why me why now? why with him? He is my soul mate God why did you take us away from one another. I know that I need to stop asking why and let you lead me to my answer, but Im sorry God you know im impatient.. I just dont know why you let me be happier than Ive ever been for 2 1/2 years with this man and then he gets taken away from me.. Lord noone will ever love him as much as I do.. No woman will ever be able to love him like that God because you know that I loved him unconditionally. Dear God I pray that you help me get over being mad at you for this because I know in my heart that you only did what is best for me but right now its hard. To dream of him and his I love you Shelly's and the Till death do us part dreams haunt me.. God if you want me to let him go God take the dreams away, but if for some reason im suppose to hold on to him Lord if there is a reason that I need to think about him and miss him and still Love him more everyday then show me the reason. Are we going to be led back to each other? Did we just have to grow as individuals first? Will he be my husband one day Lord please make these answers clear to me so that I can know wheather or not the torture will have a reward.. Father I pray for him to be happy, that he gets everything that he wants in life, Lord keep your hand on his shoulder and lead him in the way you want him to go. Do the same for me Lord and I know that if we are meant to come back to each other then we will.. I know God that I have to go through this for a reason and even though I may not know what that reason is you do and you know whats best for me.. Lord I give you my life in service. Show me God where you want me to go and what you want me to do and I will do this. Lord Im tired of running from you and what you want of me.. Lord I know that youre calling me to do something and I have been running from this call for quite sometime now. God you win take my life Lord and use me to your glory. Show me what you want of me. Lord I just pray that in the end you bring David and I back together becasue God I love him more than I love myself and I love his family just like they were my own and I know God that the reason that we are not together right now is that I wanted to do things my way and not let you lead. Well Father, the drivers seat is all yours show me God. Show me.