Take me there....
I just want to go curl up into a hole and not EVER come out. Every time it seems I've settled with one thing that is going on, something else pops up.
But on to the story, because I don't really feel like writing. I went to the dentist today for a checkup to see about the cavities and such. Luckily no cavities, but they did figure out I have a muscle or something which drags across my gums when I talk and if I do not have it fixed it can cause me to have to loose two of my teeth. I don't get it; but now I'm scared shitless because the only way to fix is it cut the muscle or to transplant a bit of muscle from somewhere else in my mouth to the spot. And depending o how bad it is, after I see the oral surgeon, I may not have an option as to which to do. Its not that I have to have surgery, or where it is but the fact is that it may affect my smile. My laugh, my ability to talk. I'm scared the most beautiful thing I wear, my smile, may be in jeapordy. I tear up now as I write this.
I've started the hormone treatment for the PCOS now and have been waking up in the morning all moody, with hot flashes and feeling sick to my stomach. It sucks because I do not react well to hormones anyway; so this makes it this much harder because I know I have to take it. :-..
I guess my thing lately it seems my body is betraying me, it is doing everything it shouldn't be doing. After this surgery, after my blood work is done to confirm/not confirm if I have problems with my sugar, and I get settled into these hormones, I swear up and down I am going to be extremely careful with my body and my health. I'm scared. I'm 24; what happens when life goes on and I'm not able to live life as I want to because I am not healthy enough? Not being independent scares the shit out of me...
I just want to curl up in a hole and die.... But I guess I can't because life goes on..
The good thing about all of this working though, I am going to have to loose weight due to the PCOS and the surgery on my mouth is definitely one way to do it. As long as there are no long term affects from it. I have to make the appointment next week and my first question are what will be the side affects; will it affect the way I talk, or laugh or my smile? :-.. I'm scared.. More scared than I've been in a while.. Pray for me please... I need it.
But on to the story, because I don't really feel like writing. I went to the dentist today for a checkup to see about the cavities and such. Luckily no cavities, but they did figure out I have a muscle or something which drags across my gums when I talk and if I do not have it fixed it can cause me to have to loose two of my teeth. I don't get it; but now I'm scared shitless because the only way to fix is it cut the muscle or to transplant a bit of muscle from somewhere else in my mouth to the spot. And depending o how bad it is, after I see the oral surgeon, I may not have an option as to which to do. Its not that I have to have surgery, or where it is but the fact is that it may affect my smile. My laugh, my ability to talk. I'm scared the most beautiful thing I wear, my smile, may be in jeapordy. I tear up now as I write this.
I've started the hormone treatment for the PCOS now and have been waking up in the morning all moody, with hot flashes and feeling sick to my stomach. It sucks because I do not react well to hormones anyway; so this makes it this much harder because I know I have to take it. :-..
I guess my thing lately it seems my body is betraying me, it is doing everything it shouldn't be doing. After this surgery, after my blood work is done to confirm/not confirm if I have problems with my sugar, and I get settled into these hormones, I swear up and down I am going to be extremely careful with my body and my health. I'm scared. I'm 24; what happens when life goes on and I'm not able to live life as I want to because I am not healthy enough? Not being independent scares the shit out of me...
I just want to curl up in a hole and die.... But I guess I can't because life goes on..
The good thing about all of this working though, I am going to have to loose weight due to the PCOS and the surgery on my mouth is definitely one way to do it. As long as there are no long term affects from it. I have to make the appointment next week and my first question are what will be the side affects; will it affect the way I talk, or laugh or my smile? :-.. I'm scared.. More scared than I've been in a while.. Pray for me please... I need it.