Wow...
Holy hell... My whole life's been turned on it's head. I lost one of my good friends recently. Kayla, so that wasn't too fun. I guess it's been heading thataway for a while, that still doesn't make it easier. Chantal and I are fighting, yet again. It's never ending... She doesn't return my calls at all anymore. It makes me think she wants me to dump her. She's been avoiding me lately, or so it seems. I've decided to do something to see how things go. I'm not going to look for her, or go where she normally is. And I'll see if she tries to plan something with me, or calls me. If she does, things are good. If not, then the relationship is done. Over. That's all there is left to do... She's lied to me through the whole relationship pretty much. It makes it impossible to trust her. She cheated on me once, that didn't help the trust at all. And now she seems to be pushing me away. I don't know if I can trust her at all really. It's kind of hard to trust someone who's lied to you for the whole relationship. I thought that if I just showed her that she could trust me, she'd stop lying. But it's never happened, she keeps secrets, everything. I don't know whether I'm a game to her or not. I just don't know. If I can't trust her, who can I trust? I care for her, but does she care for me? It doesn't seem like it lately... And that hurts me. It doesn't feel like we're dating most of the time. Apparently she wants space, so I'm giving her space. If she wants to find me, she can, I'm not hiding, but I'm not going to her, and I'm not going to make the first move here. Last time I tried this, I got bitched at and was said to be dumping everything on her. This time, I'm sticking to it. If she wants to start planning something, I'll help, but I'm not making the first move to start it. If she wants to see me, I'll see her, but she has to come to me. I'm not going to her.
On a better note, my friend Christina and I are quite a bit better friends. It's awesome ^_^ She's an awesome friend. I may meet her friend Jeff too, he's supposed to be great. I'm enjoying my friendship with her. Insanity's sure to follow, we can talk for hours about insanity, and not get bored XD
Cam's back! Yay ^^ That made a sad day much better, it's always fun to talk to that crazy bastard XD He's funny, and awesome. :) I missed him. We have religious debates and stuff all the time, it's smexy XD
Things are just odd, Kain's more depressed than ever, and I don't know what to do >.< I'm growing more distant from my old friends. I don't know what to do about Anthony or Kain... They're both depressed, and Anthony's avoiding me, while Kain's just silent all the time.
All in all, my world's gone crazy. My computer even blew itself up. I LOST everything. And I mean everything. My harddrive died, then my motherboard and CPU overheated, and everything, right now, I'm waiting on computer stuff so that my computer will actually live.
What the hell can I do? Everything's so fucked...
- Christopher
On a better note, my friend Christina and I are quite a bit better friends. It's awesome ^_^ She's an awesome friend. I may meet her friend Jeff too, he's supposed to be great. I'm enjoying my friendship with her. Insanity's sure to follow, we can talk for hours about insanity, and not get bored XD
Cam's back! Yay ^^ That made a sad day much better, it's always fun to talk to that crazy bastard XD He's funny, and awesome. :) I missed him. We have religious debates and stuff all the time, it's smexy XD
Things are just odd, Kain's more depressed than ever, and I don't know what to do >.< I'm growing more distant from my old friends. I don't know what to do about Anthony or Kain... They're both depressed, and Anthony's avoiding me, while Kain's just silent all the time.
All in all, my world's gone crazy. My computer even blew itself up. I LOST everything. And I mean everything. My harddrive died, then my motherboard and CPU overheated, and everything, right now, I'm waiting on computer stuff so that my computer will actually live.
What the hell can I do? Everything's so fucked...
- Christopher