ramblings.
i was sick again today. it was nice. not to worry, i mean. i felt lazy and carefree, and i loved it.
i love eisley, i really do. i bought room noises off itunes about a week ago and i've already memorized all the songs. their music is amazing and true and i can't get enough. it makes me want to put on a really pretty dress and go outside and lay in sunflowers or something. i don't really know, i can't explain exactly how it makes me feel. infinite, but more than that. something more complex.
i only need two things for christmas. a sidekick and [a whole lot of] money for clothes. i blew a ton of money on the tai hoodie and at hot topic and i have to wait an entire month without buying stuff. i'm such an idiot. maybe this is a sign, though. stop wasting your life buying useless shit and spend more time studying and get your grades up. focus on more important things. patch up relationships. stop judging people. spend this month gaining self-confidence and stop trying to avoid your problems with material items.
i really do need clothes though. but not t-shirts and jeans (although i do need jeans). i'm slowly crawling out of that hole. too late, though. it's winter and hoodies are about all i wear. nonetheless, i'm still going to raid urban outfitters like there's no tomorrow. that place makes me feel lovely.
i'm getting into more creative things lately. the past few months, all i've wanted to do was sit in my room, and listen to music, and go to shows, and be lazy. but now, i've been wanting to go outside and experience things. go into dallas and take pictures. i've had such a strong urge to get into photography. classes would be nice, but i'll probably end up just learning along the way. oh, and guitar. i really want to learn now. i think i might teach myself over winter break.
music and art and literature are all starting to push themselves into my world. and i'm not talking about rock music and myspace pictures and the text on a computer screen. i'm talking about REAL things. things that have been seen and heard for a while. i heard some jazz music the other day and it really opened my eyes. i realized that things like that aren't bad. there is a lot of heart and soul put into jazz music. you have to really feel it and know how to feel it and it can show you so many things.
and art. photography of beautiful things. but not beautiful like flowers are beautiful. beautiful in a different way. like highways and street signs and laughter and sunshine. things that are special to you, but everyone can relate. little things that don't seem pretty, but when you really think about it, it's those little things that truly make the life we are living beautiful.
and literature. poetry, mostly. emerson and dickinson and frost. poems that shaped the way people think today. i really love things like that. words that you have to analyze. why don't more people think the way they did back then? is it so hard to use your brain?
i'm kind of tired.
goodnight.
i love eisley, i really do. i bought room noises off itunes about a week ago and i've already memorized all the songs. their music is amazing and true and i can't get enough. it makes me want to put on a really pretty dress and go outside and lay in sunflowers or something. i don't really know, i can't explain exactly how it makes me feel. infinite, but more than that. something more complex.
i only need two things for christmas. a sidekick and [a whole lot of] money for clothes. i blew a ton of money on the tai hoodie and at hot topic and i have to wait an entire month without buying stuff. i'm such an idiot. maybe this is a sign, though. stop wasting your life buying useless shit and spend more time studying and get your grades up. focus on more important things. patch up relationships. stop judging people. spend this month gaining self-confidence and stop trying to avoid your problems with material items.
i really do need clothes though. but not t-shirts and jeans (although i do need jeans). i'm slowly crawling out of that hole. too late, though. it's winter and hoodies are about all i wear. nonetheless, i'm still going to raid urban outfitters like there's no tomorrow. that place makes me feel lovely.
i'm getting into more creative things lately. the past few months, all i've wanted to do was sit in my room, and listen to music, and go to shows, and be lazy. but now, i've been wanting to go outside and experience things. go into dallas and take pictures. i've had such a strong urge to get into photography. classes would be nice, but i'll probably end up just learning along the way. oh, and guitar. i really want to learn now. i think i might teach myself over winter break.
music and art and literature are all starting to push themselves into my world. and i'm not talking about rock music and myspace pictures and the text on a computer screen. i'm talking about REAL things. things that have been seen and heard for a while. i heard some jazz music the other day and it really opened my eyes. i realized that things like that aren't bad. there is a lot of heart and soul put into jazz music. you have to really feel it and know how to feel it and it can show you so many things.
and art. photography of beautiful things. but not beautiful like flowers are beautiful. beautiful in a different way. like highways and street signs and laughter and sunshine. things that are special to you, but everyone can relate. little things that don't seem pretty, but when you really think about it, it's those little things that truly make the life we are living beautiful.
and literature. poetry, mostly. emerson and dickinson and frost. poems that shaped the way people think today. i really love things like that. words that you have to analyze. why don't more people think the way they did back then? is it so hard to use your brain?
i'm kind of tired.
goodnight.