Want vs Need
I did a talk a few months back at a Red Nose Day themed evening event. The theme of the evening was 'What makes you happy?' and 'Wants vs Needs'. It was really weird how the talk panned out and came to me, but it's still a topic I've been working through in my head.
When I got the topic, it made me think right away of something that had happened very early on in my time in Swindon. Joel, my little host-bro, has his birthday sometime in Sept/Oct time. This one morning back then I came down to breakfast to see something absolutely priceless on the table. It was Joel's present list. Next to each item on the list was a classification as to the level of importance of each item. Off of some items, was a little arrow and a 'I want this' and off other items was an arrow saying 'I really NEED this!' It made me laugh.
It was only when I came to sit down to write my talk, several months later, that the irony of that event occurred to me. My laughing was pretty hypocritical, because although I don't write it down any more, I so often convince myself that I 'need' something, in order to be happy, attractive, complete, popular, you name it. I'm just a little less open and honest about it than Joel.
So at this particular youth event I was speaking at we did a game. The YPs had to decide which they would rather have out of x and y and then illustrate their choice by standing on that side of the room. Amongst other things, we asked them 'Would you rather have a name or a mobile phone?' More than half of them went to the Mobile Phone side. Later in the evening we had a group time discussing Poverty in Africa. We asked them what those people needed. We got answers like: Food, water, education, shelter, medicine.
But what came to my mind was, why do we think the people in Africa only need the basics, whereas we NEED the luxuries, like mobile phones? What's this assumption that they can be happy and satisfied on the basics, but we need the extras?
And what struck me above all is our ignorance here in the West. We work to earn the money, to buy the things that will make us happy. It's like we're on this relentless pursuit of happiness, but we think we can buy it, earn it, own it. Whereas, when I think of happiness, the happiest people I can think of are two friends of my parents. They're from Uganda. They don't have what they want; their village lives on what it needs. But they're so happy. Why? Could it be that we're getting it wrong?
Perhaps we've categorised happiness into the wrong box. We've decided it's something it's not. I can't believe that happiness is about having the things you want. Because I don't believe that as humans we're designed to ever get all that we want; we're not designed to be satisfied. We're designed to hunger. But the question is; what are we eating to fill that hunger within us?
Consumerism is like that fast food of happiness. It tastes good for a second but it leaves you wanting more, it doesn't even fill your stomach. And in the end it leaves you in ruins. So what's healthy to hunger after and to eat? It's funny, but the only conclusion I can reach is that it's God. I know that to a lot of people, that won't be an answer they'll want or agree with. But I believe part of how we're made, is that we're made to have relationships, love and there's one relationship that fills the gap within us perfectly, permenantly. It's the only thing that will eventually quench our hunger. It's the only thing that doesn't lead to ruin and destruction and dissatisfaction.
Jesus talks in John to a woman at the well, he talks about how earthly water never satisfies, you have a drink, and then you're thirsty again, but God gives water that satifies forever. (John 4:13-14). There's a song that I think sums up how we live our life if we thirst and hunger after what earth gives. John Mayer sings:
Something's missing
And I dont know what it is
No I dont know what it is
Somethings different
And I dont know what it is
No I dont know what it is.
Friends
(Check)
Money
(Check)
A well slept opposite sex
Guitar
(Check)
Microphone
(Check)
Messages waiting on me when
I come home
He has everything, but still something's missing. I just keep thinking how true that is. And if you ask me, the bible tells us ‘what’s missing’, if we just take a second to look and see, and change our perspective. That’s something I guess I’ll have to work on… because I’m still chasing other stuff like everyone else… Keep working on it I guess.
When I got the topic, it made me think right away of something that had happened very early on in my time in Swindon. Joel, my little host-bro, has his birthday sometime in Sept/Oct time. This one morning back then I came down to breakfast to see something absolutely priceless on the table. It was Joel's present list. Next to each item on the list was a classification as to the level of importance of each item. Off of some items, was a little arrow and a 'I want this' and off other items was an arrow saying 'I really NEED this!' It made me laugh.
It was only when I came to sit down to write my talk, several months later, that the irony of that event occurred to me. My laughing was pretty hypocritical, because although I don't write it down any more, I so often convince myself that I 'need' something, in order to be happy, attractive, complete, popular, you name it. I'm just a little less open and honest about it than Joel.
So at this particular youth event I was speaking at we did a game. The YPs had to decide which they would rather have out of x and y and then illustrate their choice by standing on that side of the room. Amongst other things, we asked them 'Would you rather have a name or a mobile phone?' More than half of them went to the Mobile Phone side. Later in the evening we had a group time discussing Poverty in Africa. We asked them what those people needed. We got answers like: Food, water, education, shelter, medicine.
But what came to my mind was, why do we think the people in Africa only need the basics, whereas we NEED the luxuries, like mobile phones? What's this assumption that they can be happy and satisfied on the basics, but we need the extras?
And what struck me above all is our ignorance here in the West. We work to earn the money, to buy the things that will make us happy. It's like we're on this relentless pursuit of happiness, but we think we can buy it, earn it, own it. Whereas, when I think of happiness, the happiest people I can think of are two friends of my parents. They're from Uganda. They don't have what they want; their village lives on what it needs. But they're so happy. Why? Could it be that we're getting it wrong?
Perhaps we've categorised happiness into the wrong box. We've decided it's something it's not. I can't believe that happiness is about having the things you want. Because I don't believe that as humans we're designed to ever get all that we want; we're not designed to be satisfied. We're designed to hunger. But the question is; what are we eating to fill that hunger within us?
Consumerism is like that fast food of happiness. It tastes good for a second but it leaves you wanting more, it doesn't even fill your stomach. And in the end it leaves you in ruins. So what's healthy to hunger after and to eat? It's funny, but the only conclusion I can reach is that it's God. I know that to a lot of people, that won't be an answer they'll want or agree with. But I believe part of how we're made, is that we're made to have relationships, love and there's one relationship that fills the gap within us perfectly, permenantly. It's the only thing that will eventually quench our hunger. It's the only thing that doesn't lead to ruin and destruction and dissatisfaction.
Jesus talks in John to a woman at the well, he talks about how earthly water never satisfies, you have a drink, and then you're thirsty again, but God gives water that satifies forever. (John 4:13-14). There's a song that I think sums up how we live our life if we thirst and hunger after what earth gives. John Mayer sings:
Something's missing
And I dont know what it is
No I dont know what it is
Somethings different
And I dont know what it is
No I dont know what it is.
Friends
(Check)
Money
(Check)
A well slept opposite sex
Guitar
(Check)
Microphone
(Check)
Messages waiting on me when
I come home
He has everything, but still something's missing. I just keep thinking how true that is. And if you ask me, the bible tells us ‘what’s missing’, if we just take a second to look and see, and change our perspective. That’s something I guess I’ll have to work on… because I’m still chasing other stuff like everyone else… Keep working on it I guess.