Smoke, Tequila, Illusion
Knowing that I would have to be at work at 5:00, I laid around the house for most of the day doing absolutely nothing due to realizing that the night was going to be long and tedious, and most likely homicidal.
James went to his dad's house last night after dropping me off. I wish Layne wouldn't be such a deutch about letting him stay at the house. It will definitely be a hell of alot easier next week when they are out of the country and I can have some peace. And life will ultimately become easier whenever I have my own place. The more that I think of it, the more I want to get out of the house but at the same time I have no idea what I'd do. I'm constantly unstable financially due to school and car fuck-ups, so I don't even know what I'd do to avoid being homeless.
I laid down for a few hours, I couldn't sleep so I sat up watching The Shining while hoping that Jon would take a break from his World of Warcraft and let ne log on. He plays computer games constantly using the only "good" computer and bitches whenever he's being pulled away to do anything involving movement. I'm describing him as my "worst case scenario" for my life if I play to many video games for a lont time period. Close to 100lb overweight, completely non-hygeinic, no job, and never seeing the sun or even breathing fresh air. Its gotten to the point where I get the worst headache when I see him sitting in the arm-chair that he pulled over and playing that fucking game. Not just from the horrible rank of his odor but because I know that he's been hogging the computer for the past three days and its going to take forever to be able to check my email.
Mom gave me a ride to work this afternoon because my car is still sitting at Bobby's house. I walked in already with a pessimistic attitude for this corporation already killing my Friday night and forcing me to slave here until 1. Cindy was basically pissed about having to close so late as well, so we both took our opportunities to bitch to each other on occasion. The night became somewhat easier when noticing that the customers were being suprisingly courteous to us.
These two broads came to my register later in the evening and it was obvious that both of them had a little too much to drink which was amusing at the time. They kept trying to touch my hands and one of them even asked me to come home with them tonight. Not wanting to sound like a prick, I politely told them that I couldn't because I had to work tonight. They didn't seem to care. They were attractive I'll admit, for someone alot older than me. Both of them appeared to be in their mid-late 30s
Mandy called me a few hours later, interested in visiting while I slaved away. She said that she would try to stop by which pushed my hopes into the air. If she didn't show up this time, I'd definitely feel like shit. She and Susannah(girl I originally thought to be Logan) walked through the doors around 11. Apparently, she (Susannah) never meant to give the hostile look a few weeks ago and apologized if she seemed to, so there werent any worries. They could only stay for a few minutes because they had to return to Barnes and Noble, but they promised to return later. Shortly after they left, I called up James who was already about to head up here anyway and asked if he wanted to throw a little alcohol induced extravaganza tonight with two chics; he seemed pretty content with the idea. With him came a partial bottle of tequilla and vodka. We would have to work in order to get some drugs, so it wasn't really worth the risk,
James came in and hung out with us as we closed down the store and while in the process of clocking out, Mandy and Susannah walked in with Nick, Shaw, and Kellan. One of us must have forgotton to lock the door or something. They surprised the hell out of me, and this could easily get me fired if Delphine checks the security tapes for tonight. But strangely, I couldnt care less about that.
We left in a convoy, first to my house so I could change into some different clothes, then back on Hull to search for a possible place to throw this party. No houses were available so were pulled into the Royal Inn Motel for shelter. We figured it would be cheap because it looked a little run down. It wasn't neccesarily a bad motel, but it sure as hell wasn't good either. Not worth $60, but we were desperate now.
We started drinking the second we walked in. Everyone took their own dosage, while I stuck with my shots of tequila and chased with a screwdriver. Susannah and Nick were doing their own seperate thing on the other bed; I think they've been close for a while or something. Either way, the alcohol inductions became apparent as we abandoned our stability to become light hearted and so heavily flirtatious.
I wasn't drunk yet; neither was James or Nick, but we were quite buzzed. Mandy on the other hand was fucked out of her mind but she was adorable while drunk.
Soon Nick and Susannah got up and dashed to the bathroom for sex. They locked the door so we couldn't stop them. They probably would have kicked our asses if we had not left them alone, and we kinda would have deserved it. All cock blocks need to die.
As time went on, Mandy and I started making out, becoming more intimate. But she also gave the same affection to James, so I wasn't sure how to perceive this. We didn't have sex, that definitely would have been too awkward for James and I... it just couldn't happen, we're cousins...same blood. Even though we wouldn't be making any homosexual contact whatsoever it still would be very awkward to make love to someone with your male cousin breathing the same air. Plus if Mandy and I were to ever engage in sex, it would have to be more romantic than a smoke-filled motel room with alcohol pouring through our systems.
She said I was a good kisser; this really boosted my self-esteem. James was rough, while I was gentle, and she liked the idea that she could have both.
She was fucking amazing kisser as well; she knew every little thing that I wanted when I make out with someone. She did the scratching nails, the neck biting, and the straddling thing, but when she tucked my hair behind my hears as she pushed her tongue into my mouth I became completely submissive to her. Absolute subservience. She could have told me to kill myself and I would have probably done it. I don't know what this meant to her, but it means everything to me.
But like I said, sex would have been really weird at this point, especially with my cousin there. Yet, I was strangely comfortable with her also kissing him; it still boggles my mind. In most cases I would have hit sadness at this point, but now it didn't bother me. A couple times I felt like I was slipping out of optimism and entering a dark corner in my mind but fortunately, I was able to find light again with another shot of tequila.
Around 6:30ish, every one started laying down. I couldn’t get comfortable so I walked outside and rested in James’ car listening to A Perfect Circle. The wind tunnel effect through the windows with the sunrise gave me the chance to meditate and steadily fall into a slumber for a good half hour. I woke up and walked back in around 8ish, Nick had left and Susannah was in tears that had become diamonds. She made diamonds out of tears because no matter how sad she looked, nothing could stop her from being so beautiful. Mandi was passed out and James was laying in bed cradling her while Kellan wasn't present and Shaw was asleep in the other bed.
I took Susannah with me as I drove James' car to Sheetz for breakfast. The Neon was fairly easy to drive, though it took some time getting used to not having to press any clutch or shift gears. She thinks Nick is going to run away and turn last night/this morning into a one night deal. I don't know Nick as well as I should, but I tell her that I really don't think he'd do that. In truth, I have no idea. But thats what we both wanted to hear.
I hope that I'm right about this.
Closer to the time for check-out, we cleaned the room some, leaving the 347234568427 cigarettes in the ash tray and the bottles and condoms on the floor. We normall ywouldn't be such bastards but it was essential for the prop comedy. According to the records, three guys checked into the room and left it with two stripped beds, condom wrappers and a room full of smoke and smelling like liqour. We thought it was funny at least.
We all went our own ways after checking out, I left with James and he came home with me to sleep at my house this afternoon since Layne was at work.
I was thinking of going to sleep but instead I played around online downloading music and thinking about how much a great kisser she was. It would have been impossible to sleep at this point.
James went to his dad's house last night after dropping me off. I wish Layne wouldn't be such a deutch about letting him stay at the house. It will definitely be a hell of alot easier next week when they are out of the country and I can have some peace. And life will ultimately become easier whenever I have my own place. The more that I think of it, the more I want to get out of the house but at the same time I have no idea what I'd do. I'm constantly unstable financially due to school and car fuck-ups, so I don't even know what I'd do to avoid being homeless.
I laid down for a few hours, I couldn't sleep so I sat up watching The Shining while hoping that Jon would take a break from his World of Warcraft and let ne log on. He plays computer games constantly using the only "good" computer and bitches whenever he's being pulled away to do anything involving movement. I'm describing him as my "worst case scenario" for my life if I play to many video games for a lont time period. Close to 100lb overweight, completely non-hygeinic, no job, and never seeing the sun or even breathing fresh air. Its gotten to the point where I get the worst headache when I see him sitting in the arm-chair that he pulled over and playing that fucking game. Not just from the horrible rank of his odor but because I know that he's been hogging the computer for the past three days and its going to take forever to be able to check my email.
Mom gave me a ride to work this afternoon because my car is still sitting at Bobby's house. I walked in already with a pessimistic attitude for this corporation already killing my Friday night and forcing me to slave here until 1. Cindy was basically pissed about having to close so late as well, so we both took our opportunities to bitch to each other on occasion. The night became somewhat easier when noticing that the customers were being suprisingly courteous to us.
These two broads came to my register later in the evening and it was obvious that both of them had a little too much to drink which was amusing at the time. They kept trying to touch my hands and one of them even asked me to come home with them tonight. Not wanting to sound like a prick, I politely told them that I couldn't because I had to work tonight. They didn't seem to care. They were attractive I'll admit, for someone alot older than me. Both of them appeared to be in their mid-late 30s
Mandy called me a few hours later, interested in visiting while I slaved away. She said that she would try to stop by which pushed my hopes into the air. If she didn't show up this time, I'd definitely feel like shit. She and Susannah(girl I originally thought to be Logan) walked through the doors around 11. Apparently, she (Susannah) never meant to give the hostile look a few weeks ago and apologized if she seemed to, so there werent any worries. They could only stay for a few minutes because they had to return to Barnes and Noble, but they promised to return later. Shortly after they left, I called up James who was already about to head up here anyway and asked if he wanted to throw a little alcohol induced extravaganza tonight with two chics; he seemed pretty content with the idea. With him came a partial bottle of tequilla and vodka. We would have to work in order to get some drugs, so it wasn't really worth the risk,
James came in and hung out with us as we closed down the store and while in the process of clocking out, Mandy and Susannah walked in with Nick, Shaw, and Kellan. One of us must have forgotton to lock the door or something. They surprised the hell out of me, and this could easily get me fired if Delphine checks the security tapes for tonight. But strangely, I couldnt care less about that.
We left in a convoy, first to my house so I could change into some different clothes, then back on Hull to search for a possible place to throw this party. No houses were available so were pulled into the Royal Inn Motel for shelter. We figured it would be cheap because it looked a little run down. It wasn't neccesarily a bad motel, but it sure as hell wasn't good either. Not worth $60, but we were desperate now.
We started drinking the second we walked in. Everyone took their own dosage, while I stuck with my shots of tequila and chased with a screwdriver. Susannah and Nick were doing their own seperate thing on the other bed; I think they've been close for a while or something. Either way, the alcohol inductions became apparent as we abandoned our stability to become light hearted and so heavily flirtatious.
I wasn't drunk yet; neither was James or Nick, but we were quite buzzed. Mandy on the other hand was fucked out of her mind but she was adorable while drunk.
Soon Nick and Susannah got up and dashed to the bathroom for sex. They locked the door so we couldn't stop them. They probably would have kicked our asses if we had not left them alone, and we kinda would have deserved it. All cock blocks need to die.
As time went on, Mandy and I started making out, becoming more intimate. But she also gave the same affection to James, so I wasn't sure how to perceive this. We didn't have sex, that definitely would have been too awkward for James and I... it just couldn't happen, we're cousins...same blood. Even though we wouldn't be making any homosexual contact whatsoever it still would be very awkward to make love to someone with your male cousin breathing the same air. Plus if Mandy and I were to ever engage in sex, it would have to be more romantic than a smoke-filled motel room with alcohol pouring through our systems.
She said I was a good kisser; this really boosted my self-esteem. James was rough, while I was gentle, and she liked the idea that she could have both.
She was fucking amazing kisser as well; she knew every little thing that I wanted when I make out with someone. She did the scratching nails, the neck biting, and the straddling thing, but when she tucked my hair behind my hears as she pushed her tongue into my mouth I became completely submissive to her. Absolute subservience. She could have told me to kill myself and I would have probably done it. I don't know what this meant to her, but it means everything to me.
But like I said, sex would have been really weird at this point, especially with my cousin there. Yet, I was strangely comfortable with her also kissing him; it still boggles my mind. In most cases I would have hit sadness at this point, but now it didn't bother me. A couple times I felt like I was slipping out of optimism and entering a dark corner in my mind but fortunately, I was able to find light again with another shot of tequila.
Around 6:30ish, every one started laying down. I couldn’t get comfortable so I walked outside and rested in James’ car listening to A Perfect Circle. The wind tunnel effect through the windows with the sunrise gave me the chance to meditate and steadily fall into a slumber for a good half hour. I woke up and walked back in around 8ish, Nick had left and Susannah was in tears that had become diamonds. She made diamonds out of tears because no matter how sad she looked, nothing could stop her from being so beautiful. Mandi was passed out and James was laying in bed cradling her while Kellan wasn't present and Shaw was asleep in the other bed.
I took Susannah with me as I drove James' car to Sheetz for breakfast. The Neon was fairly easy to drive, though it took some time getting used to not having to press any clutch or shift gears. She thinks Nick is going to run away and turn last night/this morning into a one night deal. I don't know Nick as well as I should, but I tell her that I really don't think he'd do that. In truth, I have no idea. But thats what we both wanted to hear.
I hope that I'm right about this.
Closer to the time for check-out, we cleaned the room some, leaving the 347234568427 cigarettes in the ash tray and the bottles and condoms on the floor. We normall ywouldn't be such bastards but it was essential for the prop comedy. According to the records, three guys checked into the room and left it with two stripped beds, condom wrappers and a room full of smoke and smelling like liqour. We thought it was funny at least.
We all went our own ways after checking out, I left with James and he came home with me to sleep at my house this afternoon since Layne was at work.
I was thinking of going to sleep but instead I played around online downloading music and thinking about how much a great kisser she was. It would have been impossible to sleep at this point.