(no subject)
I walked past a mirror today and saw my wings. Stopping dead in my tracks, I stared. They are massive. And broken.
I keep trying to draw them but I can never express it properly... the black feathers are dulled and they seem weighed down and brushing the floor.. I can have people walk behind me and I can feel them brush against these gigantic wings. I wonder if other people notice that. a subtle sensation of touch across their arms or legs.
I only know of a few people who can actually see them. and only one of their opinions matters. the first person to ever point out that they are being strangled.
I have lost my freedom, and meekly accept it. and damnit everyone knows. everyone fucking knows that Im miserable. and all they want is for the relationship to patch itself up so they can all go back to normal. hah. normality. whatever.
Its been a long time since I havent been able to help myself.
its so stressful I cant even sleep properly anymore. I dont rest. I just dream and fear.
and theres too many things going through my head to even write on here. bleh.
I keep trying to draw them but I can never express it properly... the black feathers are dulled and they seem weighed down and brushing the floor.. I can have people walk behind me and I can feel them brush against these gigantic wings. I wonder if other people notice that. a subtle sensation of touch across their arms or legs.
I only know of a few people who can actually see them. and only one of their opinions matters. the first person to ever point out that they are being strangled.
I have lost my freedom, and meekly accept it. and damnit everyone knows. everyone fucking knows that Im miserable. and all they want is for the relationship to patch itself up so they can all go back to normal. hah. normality. whatever.
Its been a long time since I havent been able to help myself.
its so stressful I cant even sleep properly anymore. I dont rest. I just dream and fear.
and theres too many things going through my head to even write on here. bleh.