[One-Shot] Why? Part 3/3
Title: Why? / Complicated Bonds and Regrets
Author: Sanzu
Pairing: Akame (Akanishi Jin/Kamenashi Kazuya)
Other characters: Yamashita Tomohisa, Kamenashi Kazuki (OC)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Au, Romance, humor(??), a bit angst in the later parts...
Beta by: -
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters
Summary: A bond between twins can be so strong others can't understand it. To be able to have a new beginning after their parents' death Kazuya and Kazuki decide to hide certain truths to avoid the history from repeating itself but regret it later on when things turn out even worse. Will there ever be a happy end for them?
Warning: Character getting hurt
Author Note: I'm really bad at coming up with a good title or a summary so... please just read ^^'
I've had the idea for this fic for a longer while but only now could I start writing it. I spent a lot of time preparing the story line. I was also pondering whether to make it a multi-chapter or a one-shot. I really hope it turned out well! I've always been interested in twins so in this fic Kazuya has a twin.
Part 3
Yamapi and Jin’s words were replaying in Kazuya’s head over and over. He had run into the closest bathroom to hide himself from all the staring students. The angry, cold and disgusted faces of Jin and Yamapi wouldn’t leave him alone, either.
It was at that moment that Kazuya once again found himself thinking that they really were cursed with Kazuki. No matter what they tried to do, it always ended up with them getting hurt. Even though Kazuki had had to stay strong for Kazuya, Kazuya knew he had been just as hurt as Kazuya had been deep inside. And right now Kazuya couldn’t believe there was such luck that Jin and Yamapi happened to go to the very restaurant where Kazuki was working.
Kazuya stayed the whole time he had lunch break in the toilet and in the end he was so upset he couldn’t stay at school for the rest of the day and went home instead. Kazuya knew he would start crying in front of everyone if he had to see those disgusted faces of Jin and Yamapi again that day. That’s why he saw no other option but to go home.
On the way home his cell phone started to ring silently inside his pocket and Kazuya didn’t even have to see the screen to know it was Kazuki calling him. There was no one else really right now who would call Kazuya, anyways.
“Kazuya what’s wrong?” Kazuki asked the first thing he got through the line. He didn’t even wait to hear Kazuya’s voice which was something that happened often when Kazuki was worried over Kazuya.
“N-niichan,” was Kazuya’s only word and it was enough to tell Kazuki something was seriously wrong because he could hear the coming tears in his brother’s voice. Kazuya sounded fragile and weak and almost like his world would be crashing down. It scared Kazuki because it was exactly what Kazuki didn’t want for Kazuya anymore. He had tried his best to avoid Kazuya from getting in that situation any more. But here they were again.
“Where are you?” Kazuki asked hurriedly. He needed to get to his brother. Kazuya needed him right then and he knew he had to go there no matter what. They had always been there for each other when they needed it the most. It was actually probably the first time Kazuya was on that mood when Kazuki wasn’t right beside him.
“On the way home,” Kazuya answered weakly. If Kazuya was going home, it was very serious. Kazuya was a good student and usually never agreed onto skipping school. That’s why Kazuki had literally forced Kazuya to stay home for the few days when he had been sick. On the first morning he had been too weak to protest but on the next day he would have gone if it wasn’t for Kazuki stopping him.
“I’ll be there soon. Just wait for me,” Kazuki promised. He knew Kazuya would understand even if he couldn’t make it but he was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to do any work if he hadn’t seen Kazuya was alright.
Kazuki cut the call and started to look around. His boss was very strict about the workers doing their shifts and he barely ever let a worker off early. He had said that the only way to be away from work without getting fired was to get someone do the shift for him. And that’s what Kazuki was supposed to do now.
The person who had come in since early morning to first clean up and then organize everything and finally open the place was about to leave as his shift was over but Kazuki ran up to him fast with a pleading look on his face.
“Please. Please cover for me for a few hours. It’s an emergency,” Kazuki pleaded bowing down 90 degrees to show how seriously he needed this. For Kazuki the only thing counted as an emergency really was Kazuya. If something was wrong with Kazuya he would go there no matter what it took even if it meant he would lose his job. But he needed the job so he should try to get someone cover for him.
“I’m really tired, Kazuki,” the coworker, Masato rubbed his forehead tiredly and Kazuki could see the other was exhausted but he had no one else to ask for right then. The other workers were all having their shifts for few more hours so they couldn’t do Kazuki’s shift.
“Please. It’s really an emergency. I’ll cover you up for a week if you need me to if you just cover for me this one time,” Kazuki promised pleading hard. Masato sighed. They were rather good friends at the work place and Kazuki knew he also would most likely do a favor to Masato if the other asked for it.
“Fine. But you really cover for me, then,” Masato agreed and turned around to go change his working clothes back on.
“Thank you! I will!” Kazuki bowed again and turned around to run out in his work clothes. It didn’t matter to him what he looked like, he didn’t even care that he left his bag to his locker at the backroom, he just needed to get to his twin and find out who had hurt him. So he ran through the streets towards their home as fast as he could.
Kazuki went through different possibilities for what might have happened to Kazuya while running. He really hoped it wasn’t because of Jin that Kazuya was hurting so much. But then again, if it wasn’t because of Jin, why wasn’t Jin with Kazuya? Kazuki shook his head from side to side to stop the negative thought of his brother’s first love.
When he finally got inside the apartment he found Kazuya crying to a pillow while sitting on their couch. When hearing the door open and close Kazuya lifted his tearful eyes and looked at Kazuki with that look Kazuki had never wanted to see on Kazuya’s face again. The look was breaking Kazuki’s heart.
“Niichan,” Kazuya sniffed and a few second later Kazuya was on Kazuki’s arms when the older brother had walked to the couch and pulled Kazuya in his embrace. Kazuya wrapped his arms around Kazuki to bury his face in the older one’s chest.
“What happened?” Kazuki asked while rocking them back and forth and running his hand up and down Kazuya’s back trying to calm Kazuya down even a little bit as the sobs and tears continued. Kazuki’s shirt was already getting wet from them.
“Jin…,” Kazuya let out a name in between his hard sobs. The name itself was enough to get Kazuki’s blood boiling in anger thinking that that bastard had hurt his younger brother like that. He would skin that boy alive! Those where his thoughts before Kazuya continued. “Jin thinks I’m cheating on him,” Kazuya managed to let out before his crying got harder again. The pain in Kazuya’s voice created another painful twist in Kazuki’s heart.
“Why would he think something like that?!?!?” Kazuki yelled scandalized that someone dared to think his sweet innocent brother was doing something dirty like that. Kazuki was the one who was flirting around but he couldn’t stand cheaters.
“B-because h-he saw me ye-yesterday,” Kazuya tried to explain but the tears wouldn’t stop. The constant pain filling his heart brought new tears all the time. The worst for Kazuki was that he knew how Kazuya was feeling and could feel part of it himself because of their unbelievable bond. That was the good side about their bond but at the same time it was a band point as well.
“But you were home yesterday the whole day,” Kazuki said and just like Kazuya he couldn’t understand the situation right away even though it was really obvious. Kazuki’s concentration was so much in Kazuya that he just ignored everything else.
“He saw me in a… restaurant,” Kazuya managed to get out in a way that made Kazuki realize what Kazuya was talking about.
The information made Kazuki freeze. He had been all ready to calm Kazuya down and go and find Jin and skin him alive or torture him on some way but with those words he had to come to realize that he couldn’t really blame Jin about anything. It was a misunderstanding after all, and all because of Kazuki.
“He saw me…,” Kazuki stopped the rocking when the truth came to him - the two men running away from restaurants and another one of them calling for ‘Jin’. “I’m sorry Kazuya. I should have let you tell him about us. If I had this wouldn’t have happened,” Kazuki apologized knowing now that he was the one who had done the wrong.
Kazuya didn’t have anything to answer. He wasn’t blaming Kazuki, he knew Kazuki had only meant to protect him. It was just bad luck that it had backfired on them. He knew Kazuki knew his feelings even though he didn’t say them out loud but Kazuya knew it didn’t stop Kazuki from feeling guilty about the situation.
Kazuya wished there was a way to get everything better. He even thought about going back in time and make Kazuki agree onto telling Jin about them. Maybe if Jin had known the misunderstanding wouldn’t have happened.
“Kazuya. You need to go to Jin and explain everything to him. Tell him the truth. All of it. Show him how much he means to you. That way, even if things turn out badly, you can at least say you’ve done everything you could and laid out all the secrets we have,” Kazuki told his younger brother. He really hoped Jin would listen and understand the situation. He knew it could be too much to take in but he wanted to believe that Kazuya deserved to have his first love for a longer period of time.
To be honest Kazuki had always thought that because they were so different by their characters with Kazuya that it would turn out that Kazuya would end up staying with his first love for the rest of his life while Kazuki would be dating many people before finding the one he thought he could spend the rest of his time.
“Everything?” Kazuya repeated and lifted his head to see his brother’s eyes. He knew how much Kazuki wanted to protect him so he needed to be sure Kazuki was serious about the words he said.
“Yes, every single detail you can come up with,” Kazuki confirmed. Kazuya nodded and let Kazuki dry his tears although they were still silently falling. Kazuya was determined to do as Kazuki told him, though.
“I will try my best tomorrow,” Kazuya said determined. Kazuki smiled at him and leaned to kiss his on the forehead.
“I’ll be waiting for the news,” Kazuki smiled gently and let Kazuya snuggle to his chest to find the comfort he needed. Kazuki held Kazuya tight and hoped that the best would happen. He knew he would get angry if Jin refused to even listen to Kazuya but at the same time it was somewhat understandable. He probably wouldn’t let a cheater explain anything either.
That is why Kazuki sent a small prayer hoping that some gods would hear it and answer to it.
~.~.~
Kazuya did exactly what he had said to do the next day and followed Jin around trying to get him to listen to him. Unfortunately Jin had Yamapi to help him get away from Kazuya and even though Kazuya could have maybe explained things easier to Yamapi, he wanted to tell everything to Jin first.
“Jin we need to-,” Kazuya once again ran straight to Jin after the lecturer left the lecture hall. It was exactly like had happened on the first lesson.
“There’s nothing we need to do,” Jin cut Kazuya off before the sentence was finished and Yamapi stepped in between them to let Jin get away from the hall while he stopped Kazuya from following him.
“Please Yamapi, I need to talk to him,” Kazuya pleaded with his puppy eyes.
“Aren’t you one bit ashamed?” was Yamapi’s only reply before he left the lecture hall as well. Kazuya had already realized after the first lecture that there was no meaning in trying to follow Yamapi to get to Jin because the other wouldn’t go there. It must have been their silent agreement of the subject to keep Kazuya as far away from Jin as possible.
It hurt Kazuya that the two weren’t even considering hearing him out. They had known each other for only a short moment and Kazuya understood it wasn’t easy to trust someone completely after such a short time. But he thought that because he had always been totally different from someone who would cheat and lie that the two would rather easily listen to him. He was very wrong about that.
Kazuya spent the whole lunch hour trying to find out where Jin and Yamapi were having their lunches but even though Kazuya tried to go through every place possible, he couldn’t find the two. He didn’t dare to ask the other people whether they had seen Jin and Yamapi.
There were rumors going around in the campus but all three of them were ignoring them. But those rumors were the reason why finding Jin was so much harder for Kazuya. If there were no rumors, Kazuya could have asked the other where Jin or Yamapi was but he felt uncomfortable approaching anyone because of the rumors. So Kazuya concentrated all of his energy onto stalking Jin (or at least trying to do so. It was rather hard because of the disappearing tricks) and using every possible moment there was to try and get Jin agree onto listening to him.
Unfortunately Kazuya was still trying to do just that when the final lecture ended and just like that before Kazuya even realized it the school day was over. He still refused to give up, though, and followed Jin to his home hoping that his persistence would finally pay off and Jin would turn around and tell him to talk. That didn’t happen either, though.
“Can you stop following me Kamenashi?” Jin turned to say angrily at Kazuya when the younger one refused to leave him alone. It was hurting him so much to see Kazuya when the younger one had lied to him and cheated on him like that. It was too much for him to take.
Jin felt like he had been about to break down the whole day when Kazuya kept following him and trying to talk to him. On some level he wanted to hear what Kazuya had to say but he was afraid that he would fall into lies and just be cheated on more. It was like he was being made fun off and he couldn’t accept that!
“Please just listen to me and I’ll go,” Kazuya pleaded. He was only two steps away from Jin’s arms and he really just wanted to go and hug Jin and refuse to let go of him. He was afraid, though, what Jin would do to him if he did that. He wasn’t sure if his fragile heart could take Jin pushing him away physically as well.
“I won’t listen to your lies,” Jin squint his eyes looking angrier at Kazuya than ever before. Kazuya swallowed but tried to keep strong.
“I know this sounds like a cliché but it really isn’t like you think!” Kazuya tried to make Jin believe him but it only took a moment for him to realize that Jin didn’t believe him at all. Instead Jin turned around and continued his way home with fast steps.
“Jin please. I can tell you the main truth in 5 words if you just listened to me,” Kazuya hurried after the older one. He was desperate to get Jin listen.
Jin stopped for a moment and almost looked like he was considering Kazuya’s words but then he just continued his way. Kazuya hurried his steps again and kept pleading every few minutes but Jin stayed strong and refused to listen to anything Kazuya had to say.
In the end Kazuya was standing with Jin in front of his front door while Jin was trying open it. “Please Jin, if we meant anything to you, just listen to me. I only need a few minutes to show and tell you everything!” Kazuya pleaded knowing if Jin locked himself inside the apartment there was nothing for him left to do that day. He also believed that Jin would say ok with the phrase he said. He knew they had meant a lot to Jin.
“We used to mean a lot to me but the moment I found out the truth behind that innocent face it lost all the meaning. Get away from me Kamenashi,” Jin said coldly and as he had gotten the door open stepped inside and pulled the door closed.
Inside the apartment Jin leaned against the door and started to think whether he should open the door and give Kazuya the chance he somehow believed the younger one deserved. But no, he couldn’t do it. He had clearly seen what was going on. It was the only logical explanation there was to it. Jin didn’t want to be fooled.
But still the feeling that he should listen to Kazuya was there and he wasn’t sure if he could make it through the day sober. He wondered if he had any beer or any alcohol in the house. He couldn’t remember.
The words from Jin stabbed Kazuya deep into his heart and his feet lost their power. Kazuya soon found himself from the floor feeling empty. It was like his last hope wouldn’t have been crashed into millions of pieces by the words. Why did things have to go this way? Even though Kazuya wanted to regret being born as a twin, he couldn’t. Kazuki was everything he had and he couldn’t wish in any situation that he wouldn’t be the other half of Kazuki.
He didn’t know for how long he sat there in front of Jin’s front door before he found the power to stand up again. The bad thing about Kazuya’s upset mood was that he was really careless then. It was like everything he got upset all thoughts would leave him and he would be on total autopilot for as long as Kazuki dragged him out of the state.
Knowing that deep inside, Kazuya started to walk on autopilot towards the place he knew Kazuki was at, the restaurant where everything had started.
Kazuya seriously couldn’t sense anything from around him. He didn’t see the people, didn’t feel some of the people who crashed onto him, he also didn’t hear the cars or constant talking there was around him. He just walked forward with rather slow steps continuing his way all the time without any stops.
It was dangerous, he knew on some level but that level was too deep down to be able to do anything about the autopilot mode right away. He could have taken out his cell phone and call Kazuki but Kazuya had forgotten all about cell phones even existing.
Suddenly a loud noise did wake him up at least partly from the state he was in and he turned his face towards the sound only seeing a car coming towards him. He had no time to react when he felt something hit his body hard and he was flying.
Kazuya felt no pain and only barely realized what happened before he got lost in the darkness that surrounded him really quickly.
(Here happens what was told in the end of part 2)
~.~.~
Jin was sitting in the ambulance looking at the two guys working around Kazuya. The younger one was so pale and Jin hoped Kazuya would just open his eyes to tell Jin he was really alright. He could forget about everything else, he just wanted to see Kazuya’s smile and kiss him deep. It was only on that moment that Jin realized how much he really loved Kazuya and how he didn’t want to live without the younger one in his life.
“Is he really going to be alright?” Jin asked and didn’t recognize his own voice. It sounded so weak and scared. But that was exactly like he was feeling. He was scared to death that something serious would be wrong with Kazuya.
“He’s not in danger of dying but we can’t say anything about the possible head-trauma before getting to the hospital,” was the answer Jin got from the paramedic. It didn’t make Jin feel any better. Head-traumas were never good news.
“What does that mean?” Jin squealed out. Why did Kazuya have to get in danger like this? Jin was angry at himself for not giving in to the voice telling him to give Kazuya a chance to explain everything. He had no idea how he would live with himself if Kazuya got permanently hurt somehow because of this.
“Sir, please. We’ll tell you when we know something. Let’s stay positive, alright?” The doctor asked and Jin nodded a few times.
“Positive. Yeah,” Jin repeated out loud to make himself believe he could be positive. Kazuya would survive. There would be nothing wrong with him after he woke up. But what if he didn’t wake up? Jin shook his head from side to side to stop the negative thoughts from invading his mind.
A cell phone started to ring somewhere and Jin recognized it as Kazuya’s ringtone. The doctor who had been at the scene by an accident took the device out from Kazuya’s pocket and handed it to Jin after seeing what read on the screen. It was Kazuya’s older brother calling. The doctor seemed too busy for Jin’s liking when he said Kazuya wasn’t in any kind of life-threatening danger.
“Kazuya? Where are you? What happened? I get a really bad feeling,” a panicked voice that sounded very similar to Kazuya’s was asking from the other end of the line. It was the first time Jin heard Kazuya’s older brother’s voice and he couldn’t believe he would have to break the news to the older one.
“Oniisan,” Jin started swallowing hard. He knew how close Kazuya and Kazuya’s older brother were and he wasn’t sure how the older one would react to hear Kazuya had been hit by a car. He didn’t even know how he should tell about it.
“You’re…,” Kazuya’s older brother said like he would have recognized Jin’s voice and just couldn’t believe it was actually Jin on the other end. It was slightly weird but Jin could only think about Kazuya at that moment and missed many weird things.
“I’m Akanishi Jin,” Jin introduced himself. He had imagined this moment for many times but never had it been that way. Kazuya had always been in the imaginations excitedly smiling next to Jin when he got to meet Kazuya’s only family member.
“Where’s Kazuya?” the older brother demanded to know. His voice sounded very worried and the guilt inside Jin grew.
“We… We’re on the way to hospital,” Jin had to force himself to say the words. He hated being the one who had to break the news to the older brother.
“W-what? W-what happened?” The questions came out fast but with a shaky unbelieving voice. Jin could only imagine how to older brother was feeling. Well, he could actually imagine rather well because Kazuya meant a lot for him, too.
“I… I don’t know. I wasn’t… I wasn’t there,” Jin was fighting tears when he said those words. He was blaming himself. He was rather sure that if he had just listened to Kazuya or been with him, the accident wouldn’t have happened and Kazuya wouldn’t be lying on the stretchers all pale. At best they would be laughing at each other if Jin had listened. He didn’t remember anymore the reason why he had refused to listen to his innocent beautiful Kazuya.
“How…was he hurt?” the older brother asked. Usually people asked first if someone was dead in those kinds of situations. Or that’s what Jin had seen in all the dramas and movies. But Kazuya’s older brother was asking how Kazuya was hurt. Because of Jin’s state of mind he missed that weird point as well.
“He… he got hit by a car. They say he’s not in danger but… they’re worried about how badly he hit his head,” Jin gave the information he was given by the doctor and paramedics.
“Kazuya…,” the older brother spoke out his younger brother’s name in a whisper but Jin heard it. He heard the emotions clear from the word as well. Jin could tell how worried the older brother was. “Jin, please stay with Kazuya for as long as I get there,” he pleaded then.
“I will,” Jin promised and didn’t find it one bit weird that Kazuya’s older brother was calling him so intimately by his first name like that.
“Thank you,” was the grateful and relieved answer. “And Jin. There’s a reason for everything that happened. You’ll see,” the older brother added before the line was cut. They were already almost at the hospital so Jin needed to get ready to move.
The last words Kazuya’s older brother said confused Jin a lot but he wasn’t given much time to think when the doors were opened and Kazuya was moved.
Jin followed Kazuya as far as he was let. The nurse brought him to the waiting room while the doctors would check everything about Kazuya. Jin sat in the same position the whole time and got another phone call from Kazuya’s brother who was relieved that Jin still had Kazuya’s phone because he didn’t have Jin’s number.
Apparently the older brother’s boss was being an ass and wouldn’t let him off from work before his shift was over so he pleaded for Jin to stay by Kazuya’s side even if he wouldn’t be able to come before later in the evening. Jin promised to stay there but the truth was that he wouldn’t have left Kazuya’s side even if the older brother would have asked him to do so.
It was about an hour later that Jin was allowed to see Kazuya who had been moved to his room. The doctor explained to Jin how they had stopped Kazuya’s internal bleeding with a small surgery and that there wasn’t any serious brain damage to be seen in the scans taken but because brain was very unpredictable they could only know for sure after Kazuya would wake up. So all there was to do was to wait for Kazuya to wake up and the doctor wasn’t sure when it would happen exactly.
“Wh-what could be wrong with him?” Jin asked feeling nervous. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to hear it but it was better to know beforehand what could happen than find out about it after Kazuya woke up.
“Many things could happen. He might forget about some things or have problems in doing something. It shouldn’t be permanent but we can only say after he wakes up and we can do more tests,” the doctor had explained to him. Jin could only nod and try to not feel too much afraid.
He was left alone in Kazuya’s room and as he saw the small and still pale looking Kazuya lying on the white hospital sheets the tears really fell from his eyes. He walked up to the bed and sat down on the chair next to the bed.
“Kazu… wake up soon,” Jin pleaded taking a hold of Kazuya’s hand and laid his head on the blanket and sobbed there.
~.~.~
It was already late in the evening and Kazuya’s older brother still hadn’t arrived to the hospital. Jin had sat next to Kazuya the whole time holding on to the younger one’s hand. He hadn’t informed anyone about Kazuya’s accident. Truth to be said, a thought of Yamapi hadn’t even crossed his mind. All Jin could do was stare at Kazuya and hope to see some signs of him waking up.
The nurse had stopped by once and Jin had asked him when Kazuya would wake up. She had answered that it could happen any time but it wouldn’t be abnormal even if Kazuya’s waking went to the next day. It got Jin’s mood down slightly but he kept the hope that Kazuya would wake up soon. He had the need to see the younger one awake.
The door suddenly slid open and Jin lifted his face to meet the person who was coming in. Jin froze as it was Kazuya who walked in the room. But it couldn’t be because he was holding onto Kazuya’s hand. Kazuya was unconscious and lying on the hospital bed. Jin turned to look at Kazuya to be sure the younger one was really there. He was. But he was also by the door closing it after getting inside.
“K-Kazuya… h-how?” Jin was so confused when he moved his head from the Kazuya lying on the bed to the Kazuya walking towards them.
“Nice to finally meet you, Jin,” the walking Kazuya voiced out. He had a serious look on his face and when he looked at Kazuya it turned into a sad one. “I’m Kamenashi Kazuki. Kazuya’s twin brother,” the other Kazuya was now standing on the other side of the bed and was introducing himself as Kazuya’s brother. Wait… twin brother.
“B-but… Kazuya had older brother,” Jin could only say. It was the only thing he could think about. Kazuya had an older brother and brothers didn’t look that much alike.
“He has. Me. Though it’s only by 10 minutes,” Kazuki told Jin and gave the confused guy a small smile. Kazuki knew it wasn’t the best moment to tell Jin everything but it couldn’t be avoided.
Jin was staring at the other Kazuya… no, Kazuya’s older brother who was Kazuya’s twin. The small smile he gave at Jin was identical to the one Kazuya had but the look in his eyes was different. Still it was so confusing. Twins? Seriously?
“You… You’re Kazuya’s older brother?” Jin had to ask again to be sure. The whole situation felt very unreal. He couldn’t believe it.
“Yes. And the one to blame of all of this,” Kazuki spoke the guilt that had started to eat him the moment he heard about Kazuya being in the accident. He had been working normally when all of a sudden a real bad feeling filled him making it hard to breath. He was hurting and he knew Kazuya was hurting and it was on some level he had never been hurt before. That’s why Kazuki had made the panicked phone call to get to know what was going on.
“No. I… I should have listened to Kazu!” Jin protested. “If I had this wouldn’t have happened,” Jin almost whispered the words. Kazuki could see Jin was fighting the tears again. But Jin didn’t know the whole truth yet so he couldn’t know who was to be blamed.
“Maybe you should have. But it’s because of my overprotective side that Kazuya still didn’t tell you about us,” Kazuki revealed while stroking Kazuya’s hair gently. The guilt got so much bigger when he saw Kazuya looking so small on the hospital bed.
“What are you saying?” Jin got confused. He had thought that it was some mean joke for Kazuya to keep the twin thing as a secret. He thought that but still he was so worried about Kazuya and just wanted the latter to wake up. He admitted he probably would have yelled at Kazuya after getting over the relief that Kazuya was alright but now he got more confused. Was he or was he not played with?
“He told you we’re from a small town. It was never easy for us. We felt like no one was hanging out with us from honest feelings and it hurt us. Kazuya even thought we were cursed to not be allowed to have real friends and have a normal life and things only got worse after our parents died. We wanted to move on but the people wouldn’t let us. That’s why we moved here and I never wanted to see Kazuya suffering like that again,” Kazuki explained while keeping his eyes on his younger twin the whole time. It physically hurt Kazuki to see Kazuya so pale and unmoving.
“That’s why I made a decision that we both would keep this twin thing as a secret. I wanted to make sure Kazuya would get the normal life he deserves. Then he met you and Yamapi and was really happy to have real friends and later you as his boyfriend. Then he told me he wanted to tell you guys about us but I refused him. I thought you hadn’t known each other for long enough. Now it’s because of my want to protect him that he’s here,” Kazuki spoke rather calmly but tears started to flow from his eyes. It was heartbreaking for Jin to watch as well.
“So… it… it wasn’t… Kazuya on… that day in…,” Jin started to ask hesitantly.
“No. Oh God no. It was me. I work in that restaurant. Kazuya’s the innocent one out of us. He doesn’t go flirting around. That’s all me,” Kazuki hurried to answer Jin’s question before it was even finished. He looked at Jin with pleading eyes that reminded him so much of Kazuya’s as they were identical.
“How… how can people tell you apart?” Jin asked clearing his throat. He found the question to be rather rude but he needed to know. He needed to know to be able to tell which one was his Kazu in the future. He didn’t want to mix Kazu with his older brother.
“There aren’t really any differences between our looks. The only way to tell us apart is our habits and personalities. Apart from our family no one ever went through the trouble to learn to tell us apart,” Kazuki shared and Jin started to feel sorry for the twins. He understood Kazuya and Kazuki were two different people but when people rather saw them as one it must have been really offending.
Jin didn’t find anything to say in the situation, though, so silence fell upon them. Jin was deep in thought when suddenly Kazuki started to move. When Jin lifted his head he saw how Kazuki was moving Kazuya to the side.
“What are you doing?” Jin stood up slightly scandalized about what was happening. Kazuki finished moving Kazuya and got on the bed after removing his shoes and lay down next to Kazuya wrapping an arm around Kazuya’s waist.
“We’ve long ago discovered that when we’re sick we heal faster when the other is as close as possible. No one can explain it but that’s also the reason the doctors are allowing me to stay here the whole time. I will probably lose my job, though, but I need to stay by Kazuya’s side until he gets better,” Kazuki told Jin but his eyes were still on Kazuya the whole time.
“I… didn’t know about that,” Jin sat down back on the bed feeling slightly useless. Kazuki’s presence would make Kazuya heal faster but what was he doing there? Was there anything good about his company to Kazuya?
“I know it’s hard to understand the bond between twins but… you’re very important to Kazuya. He might not be able to tell you that you’re his most important person in this universe but his feelings for you are still very real and strong,” Kazuki explained the best he could but it was impossible. Still, he felt like he owned it for Kazuya to try and fix things between the two.
He gave Jin the time to think through everything he had learnt in a short time and just concentrated on Kazuya who was breathing evenly like he was asleep. It only was that he was still so pale.
“If… I do your shift tomorrow I can be useful, right?” Jin asked suddenly. Kazuki turned to look at his brother’s boyfriend and could see he had been thinking of the situation and remembered all the details. He really was into Kazuya. Kazuki was happy to notice that.
“I think that’s the only way I could still have my job,” Kazuki admitted.
“Then I’ll go tomorrow and do your shift. You stay with Kazu and make sure he gets well,” Jin said determined.
“Kazuya really chose the right person to fall in love with,” Kazuki smiled fully accepting Jin even as a part of the family if the two decided to be so serious in the future. He still thought it was way too early for Kazuya and Jin to take any big steps like a real overprotective brother he was supposed to be.
Jin blushed at the words and lowered his head to hide it. Although Kazuki looked exactly like Kazuya and was only 10 minutes older than Kazuya, there was still the clear older brother aura around him and to hear that he was somewhat accepted by someone who was Kazuya’s only family was making him embarrassed like he would be in front of Kazuya’s parents.
The nurse came to tell Jin he had to go home some time later and so he and Kazuki only agreed about Jin going to the restaurant to work Kazuki’s shift and then meet in the hospital after the shift was over.
~.~.~
Kazuya woke up the next day in the early afternoon about an hour after the lunch was served. Kazuki was provided a lunch by the hospital, too, as he was allowed to stay by Kazuya’s side as the twin treatment. So he lied the whole day next to Kazuya watching TV. And that’s why noticed right away when Kazuya started to stir awake.
“Kazuya?” Kazuki sat up on the bed and took Kazuya’s hand in his. Kazuya was trying to open his eyes but the light was hurting his eyes so he had to open and close his eyes for some times before he was able to hold his eyes open and get Kazuki in his sight.
“J-J-Ji…n?” Kazuya voiced out the first thing. Kazuki understood it wasn’t to call if Jin was the one in the room calling for him. He knew it was a question for him asking where Jin was.
“Jin’s at the restaurant working in my place so that I’m able stay here by your side,” Kazuki explained to the tired looking Kazuya.
“Jin… there? I… tasted,” Kazuya said making Kazuki frown. Kazuya’s speaking was weird. It seemed like it took a lot of energy from him to form words and his words didn’t make too much sense to an outsider. Kazuki could guess what Kazuya was talking about but he was worried.
“You mean you heard Jin here?” Kazuki asked. Kazuya nodded and seemed to realize himself as well that his speech was abnormal. He turned his eyes to Kazuki after having been looking around in the room and Kazuki could see fear in them.
“I’ll call the doctor. I’m sure it’s only temporary, don’t worry,” Kazuki gave his usual smile that calmed Kazuya down and it seemed to work that time as well. Kazuki turned over to press the button to call the doctor. The nurse had told him to do so when Kazuya would wake up.
A few minutes later the doctor came to the room with a nurse following. He gave a smile to the twins who were both still lying on the bed. The only way he could tell them apart were the clothes as Kazuya was wearing the hospital gown.
“How are we feeling here?” the doctor asked going through the papers telling all the possible changes in Kazuya’s situation.
“Tyre,” Kazuya pronounced. The doctor stopped the page flipping midway and turned his eyes towards Kazuya in slight surprise.
“He means he’s tired. I think something’s wrong with his speaking,” Kazuki translated as the doctor didn’t seem to realize what was going on.
“A… I see. We’ll have to make some tests then if that’s alright with you,” the doctor smiled in understanding. Kazuya only nodded in agreement he seemed reluctant talking because of the speaking problem. Kazuki hoped it really was something temporary as he was still hoping for a normal life to his brother.
“Then I must ask your brother to stand up so that we can take you,” the doctor kept the friendly smile on his face and Kazuki did as he was told. Kazuya turned his nervous eyes to his brother clearly afraid to go alone to do the examinations.
“Don’t be scared, Kazuya. I’ll be right here waiting for you to come back,” Kazuki encouraged while the nurse was preparing to move the bed.
Kazuya didn’t speak much to other people during the whole day. The nurses came often and tried to speak with Kazuya but the boy kept his mouth shut and only agreed to talk with Kazuki because he felt ashamed that he couldn’t speak. But he was waiting for Jin to come feeling both excited and frightened. Kazuki hadn’t told Kazuya more than that he and Jin had talked but to other questions he answered that Kazuya should discuss about them with Jin.
Kazuya told how he wanted to talk so much with Jin if he really was listening to them now. But at the same time he felt sad because he wasn’t able to talk. He had been trying to get his chance to explain so hard but had been refused the whole time and now when he had the chance he couldn’t speak so that people could understand him.
Kazuya’s long wait was awarded when Jin finally came in while they were watching TV. Jin looked slightly worried when he stepped inside but his face brightened when he saw that Kazuya had woken up. Jin had been scared that he would come and Kazuya would still be sleeping and he would be told that something had gone wrong with Kazuya while he was working for Kazuki.
“It’s time for me to go and have some real food,” Kazuki said and jumped off the bed. “Take care of him. He has temporary speech problems that make his speaking hard to understand,” Kazuki told Jin on his way out and closed the door behind him.
The news took Jin aback for awhile but the main point was Kazuya was awake and he only had temporary problems. That was all that mattered for Jin because he hadn’t lost any part of Kazuya in the accident though it had been looking rather bad from Jin’s point of view.
“I’m glad you’ve woken up,” Jin opened the conversation after about one minute of silence. “I was so scared when I saw you lying on the street,” he walked hesitantly closer and sat down on the chair where he had sat the previous day as well.
“Jin f-fi-wi-fin---ding me?” Kazuya asked looking for the right word with what looked like a lot of work. Jin got slightly startled by this though Kazuki had told him Kazuya had problems with speaking. It was still different to actually hear it himself.
“There were other people there but I came to see and… I came to the hospital with you,” Jin told the younger one. He took Kazuya’s hand into his and it was like the misunderstanding between them had been all forgotten.
“I hiss Jin,” Kazuya said next in tears as he was squeezing Jin’s hand hard like he was afraid to let go of it. Jin felt mixed emotions as he was confused about what Kazuya said but at the same time he felt sad to see Kazuya’s tears. Jin stood up and sat down on the bed holding on to Kazuya’s hand.
“You mean miss?” Jin asked gently to be sure while bringing his free hand to stroke Kazuya’s face and dry the few fallen tears away. Kazuya nodded and leaned into Jin’s touch.
“Jin still hungry? H-hate?” Kazuya pronounced the words carefully trying his best to get the right words but looked like he was sure he had failed in it. Jin got confused of the first question but the second one-word question helped him to understand what Kazuya was trying to ask.
“Kazuki-kun explained many things to me,” Jin answered though he wasn’t actually answering the question asked. “I understand your situation better but… let’s talk about this after you’re fully recovered. I just want to see you healthy,” Jin finished still not giving Kazuya the answer whether he was angry or not.
Kazuya nodded and closed his eyes trying to prevent the tears from falling but didn’t succeed in it. Jin had the right to be angry, Kazuya knew. He just didn’t want Jin to leave him. The older one clearly still cared a lot for him but it didn’t mean he would be able to forgive Kazuya for hiding things from him. And right now Kazuya wasn’t able to have a conversation because of the stupid speaking problem. That meant that he had to wait.
Jin saw the tears falling from Kazuya’s eyes and his heart twisted painfully. He leaned forward to hug Kazuya as tightly as he dared.
“I love you, Kazu. I just need to hear everything from your mouth,” Jin spoke in a low voice just next to Kazuya’s ear. Kazuya froze for a moment but then started to cry harder fisting Jin’s shirt in between his fingers. It was the first time Jin said those words to him. He wanted to answer so badly but he was afraid his words would change into something totally different and decided against confessing. He would do it after his speaking was back to normal.
“Why are you crying, Kazu? I hate to see you cry,” Jin pulled back and cupped Kazuya’s face in his palms to look worriedly at the younger on in the eyes. “Please don’t cry anymore,” Jin pleaded and showed his kicked puppy dog eyes hoping it would make Kazuya laugh.
It did. Kauzya let out a laugh but the tears were still falling. He was just so happy that Jin was there by his side and said that he loved him. Kazuya just didn’t want to make Jin misunderstand him or doubt him in any way so he rather didn’t speak out loud.
For the first time on that day Kazuya took the notebook and a pencil from the table next to his bed. The doctor had said it might be easier for him to write because Kazuya did know the words. They just got mixed up when he was supposed to speak them out loud. So Kazuya took the pencil and opened the note book. He had refused to write so far because it would mean he really couldn’t talk and that would make him look pathetic.
‘Happy’ Kazuya wrote looked at the word for a few moments to make sure it was the right word but still he wasn’t completely sure. His brain was confused because of all the words he hadn’t managed to voice out the right way.
“You’re happy?” Jin confirmed after reading the word and Kazuya nodded. Then he started to write more to tell his feelings to Jin from that moment.
“I want to talk but I’m afraid you’ll misunderstand me,” Jin read out loud. Jin took the notebook and a pencil away from Kazuya and landed them back on the table.
“I’m happy you consider me like this but if you hate writing in that thing, don’t write just because of me. I’ll manage to understand you somehow no matter what comes out from your mouth,” Jin promised making Kazuya really happy.
“Sank you,” Kazuya smiled but Jin burst out laughing.
“I’m sorry. I know you can’t help it and I don’t mean to make fun of you or anything but… I just realized how funny things you can let out now and then because of this,” Jin tried to stop chuckling. Kazuya was looking at Jin like the older on lost his head.
“Sorry, sorry I’ll stop,” Jin promised and cleared his throat to get control of his voice but then Kazuya started to giggle and Jin burst out laughing again.
“I’m glad to see you two so happy,” Kazuki spoke from the door having returned too silently for the two to hear him.
“Neechan,” Kazuya smiled brightly towards his older brother but the suddenly took a pondering expression before he started laughing again. Jin had also stopped for a second and waited for Kazuya’s reaction after the word. He couldn’t help himself from laughing when Kazuya started to laugh.
“Yeah, right. I feel like I’m being made fun off even though Kazuya can’t help the mistakes,” Kazuki tsk’ed and walked to sit on the chair on the other side of the bed. Jin also moved down from the bed to the chair he had been sitting on just earlier.
The two just continued giggling and Kazuki couldn’t help the smile spreading on his lips as well. Somehow the situation made him feel like he really was the older brother and the feeling wasn’t all that bad. Hopefully he would get an upper hand on Jin because of it.
~.~.~
Some months later
It was a beautiful warm day and everything was rather normal. Kazuya’s speaking got as perfect as it had been before the accident really quickly and he recovered in other ways as well as he had gotten some scars and hurting muscles from the hit he got. The first thing he did after he noticed he could speak normally again was to tell Jin he loved him. And after that Kazuya told everything from his and Kazuki’s past to the present from his point of view. It was a lot similar with Kazuki’s but Jin still liked it that he had heard everything from Kazuya in so many details.
After the talk Jin and Kazuya had things returned to the normal. Only difference was that now Jin knew that Kazuya and his older brother were identical twins and was trying hard to learn to tell them apart. He was pretty good at it already but sometimes got confused. They also told Yamapi about Kazuki and he was very surprised to hear the truth. He also was mad at Jin for not calling him when Kazuya got in to a hospital because of the car accident. Jin could only apologize and try to explain that the thought of Yamapi hadn’t even crossed his mind before he had looked at his cell phone again after some days and seen all those missed calls Yamapi had sent him when he didn’t come to school.
Kazuya was happy every day as he had a good friend, a boyfriend and his brother had also finally gotten on the long awaited date with the regular customer he had been flirting with. It seemed to be going rather well so far. Plus Kazuki could relax when he could see how happy Kazuya was.
In that very beautiful morning not everyone was happy, though. The one to make the exception was one Kamenashi Kazuki whose mood had been ruined that very morning by just a few written words on a piece of a paper.
Kazuki marched to the campus area he had never been before but had heard about so many times from Kazuya. He was furious but he hid it rather well, saving it to the one who ruined his mood. He would find one certain Akanishi Jin and skin him alive even if it was the last thing he would do. How dare that bastard!! With these thoughts in mind Kazuki made his way further in the campus area.
It was lunch time and most students were outside in the good weather enjoying their lunches in different places. He had heard from Kazuya that Jin was popular in the campus area so he stopped two girls who were laughing.
“Where’s Akanishi?” Kazuki asked. He felt too angry to call Jin by his first name. The girls looked at each other in confusion before returned their gazes to Kazuki.
“Weren’t you just with him?” the other girl questioned confused. It was natural, Kazuya was with Jin and no one knew Kazuya had a twin.
“Where?” Kazuki gritted through his teeth and the girls pointed towards a direction they had been coming from. Kazuki hurried to the said direction. He was fisting a piece of paper in his hand so hard his knuckles had turned white.
Kazuki came to an almost park like area with lots of trees and benches. He stopped and scanned the area to find who he was looking for. There were many students enjoying the warm beautiful weather but Kazuki went through every single one of them patiently.
There!
His eyes locked on the happy figure that was holding Kazuya by his side with an arm around his shoulders. A friend of them, Yamapi, was laughing at whatever Jin was saying while Kazuya had a happy smile on his face. Happy or not, Kazuki would not agree onto this!
By then many students had already noticed that there were two Kazuyas suddenly in the area. Kazuki started to walk towards the three who were yet to notice his presence.
“Akanishi!” Kazuki yelled out in anger when he was close enough. Kazuya and Jin froze on their spots and turned their heads slowly to Kazuki. Kazuya because he recognized Kazuki’s voice right away and knew exactly what was going on and Jin because of the angry tone. The two stood up and stepped slightly away from each other. “What the hell is this?!” Kazuki screamed and threw the paper he had been fisting in his hand at Jin.
“Niichan,” Kazuya breathed out realizing what paper it was. He had written it, after all, and left for Kazuki to read that morning before leaving for school.
Many students had gathered around them to stare, mostly because it was the first time they saw two Kazuyas and they had no idea what on earth was going on. Kazuki could understand that but he wouldn’t care less. He had a mission. And that mission was to skin Jin alive.
“O-Oniisan,” Jin stumbled with his words after seeing what the paper was about. Jin was still calling Kazuki as older brother, though in reality Jin was older than him. They all still agreed that Kazuki had the aura of an older brother and really acted like he was older than them.
“Don’t you ‘oniisan’ me you asshole!” Kazuki continued yelling. “He’s only 20 years old! How dare you do something like this?!?!” he added as if it was argument enough.
“Y-You’re 20 years old as well,” Jin reminded him quietly but it didn’t make any difference. Not to Kazuki and definitely not because of what read in the paper.
“Shut up!” Kazuki screamed so loud Jin flinched and really shut his mouth. Yamapi was staring at Kazuki as it was the first time he met the older brother of Kazuya’s. He knew by then, of course, that they were twins but to see the twins for the first time he was really amazed by the similar looks and scared to death by the scary aura. “I’m not the one being asked to get engaged for marriage which, by the way, is illegal in Japan!” Kazuki wasn’t losing any of his energy and his voice stayed both loud and angry.
“Niichan… calm down,” Kazuya decided to walk to his older brother then and wrapped his arms around the older one partly to keep him still before Kazuki decided to launch himself at Jin and hurt him physically and partly to calm him down.
“You know I love him, oniisan,” Jin took a few steps closer to the twins to show he wasn’t too much afraid though the fear was in his eyes. Still he was brave enough to get closer to the older brother whose approval he needed to be able to be with Kazuya.
“I know but he’s too young to do this now,” Kazuki protested having calmed slightly down because of Kazuya hugging him like that. But the anger was still there hidden under the surface and he knew he would blow up if Jin said one wrong word.
“I bet to you he’s never going to be old enough to take this step,” Jin muttered.
“Say that again Akanishi!” Kazuki’s fury flamed again with that comment and he heard how Kazuya sent silent curses to Jin who realized his mistake. Yamapi started to laugh on the background. Kazuki wanted Kazuya to be happy, get married even if that was possible in some way, but not when he was 20 years old and had only known his boyfriend for five months.
“You just want to keep Kazuya to yourself. You’re his brother but you act like his parent. You both are already 20 years old and well capable of making your own decisions,” Jin shot back at Kazuki wanting to speak what he felt.
Kazuki froze of those words. It was the truth. He hadn’t meant to become Kazuya’s parent because he loved being Kazuya’s brother but somehow when the responsibility of Kazuya had been set on his shoulders he had become a parent like figure to the younger one. Parent or brother he still wouldn’t agree onto what Jin was trying to do.
“We’re not going to leave you behind. I understand you two need to be close to each other. That’s why we’re looking for big enough apartment for all of us to stay at,” Jin told in hope to calm Kazuki down and for a moment it really looked like it. Kazuki blinked a few times to understand what was said and Kazuya seemed to be only one who could feel the coming danger.
Jin was already smiling and turned to Yamapi to show a victory sign of speaking over the over-protective brother when something snapped. Yamapi saw it when Jin was still in his happiness and started to show Jin signs to run away which the Bakanishi couldn’t understand at all.
“AKANISHI!!!!!!” Kazuki yelled in rage and broke free from Kazuya’s hold preparing to beat the grab out of Jin who realized the danger and started to run for his live. Kazuya would have wanted to stop Kazuki but at the same time, he also agreed it was too early for him and Jin to move further in their relationship so he decided to let Kazuki give Jin a lesson.
“Is he… really that much against you guys?” Yamapi walked to Kazuya to ask from the younger one while they were looking at how Jin was being chased by furious Kazuki. To an outsider it probably looked like Kazuki didn’t like the fact that Jin and Kazuya were together, although it was the complete opposite.
“No. It’s because we’ve only known each other for 5 months and so he’s not happy about us moving that fast. Moving in together and getting engaged for marriage are like the two biggest steps in life for us and Kazuki especially hates people who take them too lightly which is exactly what Jin is doing,” Kazuya explained.
“You could have told that to him,” Yamapi reminded and blinked a few times to understand everything.
“I could have. But he’s too stubborn to understand. Also, it gives a nice show, don’t you think?” Kazuya grinned at Yamapi knowing Kazuki wouldn’t hurt Jin too badly but that he would only be satisfied after Jin would understand how big of a thing they were talking about.
“You’re right. It’s rare to see Jin screaming and running for his life like that,” Yamapi laughed and Kazuya joined it.
“I’M GOING TO KILL YOU AKANISHI JIN!” Kazuki’s scream could be heard even after the two disappeared from the sight.
The End
~.~.~
This is the story. Hope you all liked it ^^
Those waiting for If You're the One sequel. I have made progress but there are still some pages I need to write. It will most likely take over one week before I could get it done but I'll try! Hope you have patience to wait for it a little while longer!
Thank you everyone and I would really like to read what you think about this ^o^ So, leave a comment please? *puppy dog eyes*
Author: Sanzu
Pairing: Akame (Akanishi Jin/Kamenashi Kazuya)
Other characters: Yamashita Tomohisa, Kamenashi Kazuki (OC)
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Au, Romance, humor(??), a bit angst in the later parts...
Beta by: -
Disclaimer: I don't own the characters
Summary: A bond between twins can be so strong others can't understand it. To be able to have a new beginning after their parents' death Kazuya and Kazuki decide to hide certain truths to avoid the history from repeating itself but regret it later on when things turn out even worse. Will there ever be a happy end for them?
Warning: Character getting hurt
Author Note: I'm really bad at coming up with a good title or a summary so... please just read ^^'
I've had the idea for this fic for a longer while but only now could I start writing it. I spent a lot of time preparing the story line. I was also pondering whether to make it a multi-chapter or a one-shot. I really hope it turned out well! I've always been interested in twins so in this fic Kazuya has a twin.
Part 3
Yamapi and Jin’s words were replaying in Kazuya’s head over and over. He had run into the closest bathroom to hide himself from all the staring students. The angry, cold and disgusted faces of Jin and Yamapi wouldn’t leave him alone, either.
It was at that moment that Kazuya once again found himself thinking that they really were cursed with Kazuki. No matter what they tried to do, it always ended up with them getting hurt. Even though Kazuki had had to stay strong for Kazuya, Kazuya knew he had been just as hurt as Kazuya had been deep inside. And right now Kazuya couldn’t believe there was such luck that Jin and Yamapi happened to go to the very restaurant where Kazuki was working.
Kazuya stayed the whole time he had lunch break in the toilet and in the end he was so upset he couldn’t stay at school for the rest of the day and went home instead. Kazuya knew he would start crying in front of everyone if he had to see those disgusted faces of Jin and Yamapi again that day. That’s why he saw no other option but to go home.
On the way home his cell phone started to ring silently inside his pocket and Kazuya didn’t even have to see the screen to know it was Kazuki calling him. There was no one else really right now who would call Kazuya, anyways.
“Kazuya what’s wrong?” Kazuki asked the first thing he got through the line. He didn’t even wait to hear Kazuya’s voice which was something that happened often when Kazuki was worried over Kazuya.
“N-niichan,” was Kazuya’s only word and it was enough to tell Kazuki something was seriously wrong because he could hear the coming tears in his brother’s voice. Kazuya sounded fragile and weak and almost like his world would be crashing down. It scared Kazuki because it was exactly what Kazuki didn’t want for Kazuya anymore. He had tried his best to avoid Kazuya from getting in that situation any more. But here they were again.
“Where are you?” Kazuki asked hurriedly. He needed to get to his brother. Kazuya needed him right then and he knew he had to go there no matter what. They had always been there for each other when they needed it the most. It was actually probably the first time Kazuya was on that mood when Kazuki wasn’t right beside him.
“On the way home,” Kazuya answered weakly. If Kazuya was going home, it was very serious. Kazuya was a good student and usually never agreed onto skipping school. That’s why Kazuki had literally forced Kazuya to stay home for the few days when he had been sick. On the first morning he had been too weak to protest but on the next day he would have gone if it wasn’t for Kazuki stopping him.
“I’ll be there soon. Just wait for me,” Kazuki promised. He knew Kazuya would understand even if he couldn’t make it but he was pretty sure he wouldn’t be able to do any work if he hadn’t seen Kazuya was alright.
Kazuki cut the call and started to look around. His boss was very strict about the workers doing their shifts and he barely ever let a worker off early. He had said that the only way to be away from work without getting fired was to get someone do the shift for him. And that’s what Kazuki was supposed to do now.
The person who had come in since early morning to first clean up and then organize everything and finally open the place was about to leave as his shift was over but Kazuki ran up to him fast with a pleading look on his face.
“Please. Please cover for me for a few hours. It’s an emergency,” Kazuki pleaded bowing down 90 degrees to show how seriously he needed this. For Kazuki the only thing counted as an emergency really was Kazuya. If something was wrong with Kazuya he would go there no matter what it took even if it meant he would lose his job. But he needed the job so he should try to get someone cover for him.
“I’m really tired, Kazuki,” the coworker, Masato rubbed his forehead tiredly and Kazuki could see the other was exhausted but he had no one else to ask for right then. The other workers were all having their shifts for few more hours so they couldn’t do Kazuki’s shift.
“Please. It’s really an emergency. I’ll cover you up for a week if you need me to if you just cover for me this one time,” Kazuki promised pleading hard. Masato sighed. They were rather good friends at the work place and Kazuki knew he also would most likely do a favor to Masato if the other asked for it.
“Fine. But you really cover for me, then,” Masato agreed and turned around to go change his working clothes back on.
“Thank you! I will!” Kazuki bowed again and turned around to run out in his work clothes. It didn’t matter to him what he looked like, he didn’t even care that he left his bag to his locker at the backroom, he just needed to get to his twin and find out who had hurt him. So he ran through the streets towards their home as fast as he could.
Kazuki went through different possibilities for what might have happened to Kazuya while running. He really hoped it wasn’t because of Jin that Kazuya was hurting so much. But then again, if it wasn’t because of Jin, why wasn’t Jin with Kazuya? Kazuki shook his head from side to side to stop the negative thought of his brother’s first love.
When he finally got inside the apartment he found Kazuya crying to a pillow while sitting on their couch. When hearing the door open and close Kazuya lifted his tearful eyes and looked at Kazuki with that look Kazuki had never wanted to see on Kazuya’s face again. The look was breaking Kazuki’s heart.
“Niichan,” Kazuya sniffed and a few second later Kazuya was on Kazuki’s arms when the older brother had walked to the couch and pulled Kazuya in his embrace. Kazuya wrapped his arms around Kazuki to bury his face in the older one’s chest.
“What happened?” Kazuki asked while rocking them back and forth and running his hand up and down Kazuya’s back trying to calm Kazuya down even a little bit as the sobs and tears continued. Kazuki’s shirt was already getting wet from them.
“Jin…,” Kazuya let out a name in between his hard sobs. The name itself was enough to get Kazuki’s blood boiling in anger thinking that that bastard had hurt his younger brother like that. He would skin that boy alive! Those where his thoughts before Kazuya continued. “Jin thinks I’m cheating on him,” Kazuya managed to let out before his crying got harder again. The pain in Kazuya’s voice created another painful twist in Kazuki’s heart.
“Why would he think something like that?!?!?” Kazuki yelled scandalized that someone dared to think his sweet innocent brother was doing something dirty like that. Kazuki was the one who was flirting around but he couldn’t stand cheaters.
“B-because h-he saw me ye-yesterday,” Kazuya tried to explain but the tears wouldn’t stop. The constant pain filling his heart brought new tears all the time. The worst for Kazuki was that he knew how Kazuya was feeling and could feel part of it himself because of their unbelievable bond. That was the good side about their bond but at the same time it was a band point as well.
“But you were home yesterday the whole day,” Kazuki said and just like Kazuya he couldn’t understand the situation right away even though it was really obvious. Kazuki’s concentration was so much in Kazuya that he just ignored everything else.
“He saw me in a… restaurant,” Kazuya managed to get out in a way that made Kazuki realize what Kazuya was talking about.
The information made Kazuki freeze. He had been all ready to calm Kazuya down and go and find Jin and skin him alive or torture him on some way but with those words he had to come to realize that he couldn’t really blame Jin about anything. It was a misunderstanding after all, and all because of Kazuki.
“He saw me…,” Kazuki stopped the rocking when the truth came to him - the two men running away from restaurants and another one of them calling for ‘Jin’. “I’m sorry Kazuya. I should have let you tell him about us. If I had this wouldn’t have happened,” Kazuki apologized knowing now that he was the one who had done the wrong.
Kazuya didn’t have anything to answer. He wasn’t blaming Kazuki, he knew Kazuki had only meant to protect him. It was just bad luck that it had backfired on them. He knew Kazuki knew his feelings even though he didn’t say them out loud but Kazuya knew it didn’t stop Kazuki from feeling guilty about the situation.
Kazuya wished there was a way to get everything better. He even thought about going back in time and make Kazuki agree onto telling Jin about them. Maybe if Jin had known the misunderstanding wouldn’t have happened.
“Kazuya. You need to go to Jin and explain everything to him. Tell him the truth. All of it. Show him how much he means to you. That way, even if things turn out badly, you can at least say you’ve done everything you could and laid out all the secrets we have,” Kazuki told his younger brother. He really hoped Jin would listen and understand the situation. He knew it could be too much to take in but he wanted to believe that Kazuya deserved to have his first love for a longer period of time.
To be honest Kazuki had always thought that because they were so different by their characters with Kazuya that it would turn out that Kazuya would end up staying with his first love for the rest of his life while Kazuki would be dating many people before finding the one he thought he could spend the rest of his time.
“Everything?” Kazuya repeated and lifted his head to see his brother’s eyes. He knew how much Kazuki wanted to protect him so he needed to be sure Kazuki was serious about the words he said.
“Yes, every single detail you can come up with,” Kazuki confirmed. Kazuya nodded and let Kazuki dry his tears although they were still silently falling. Kazuya was determined to do as Kazuki told him, though.
“I will try my best tomorrow,” Kazuya said determined. Kazuki smiled at him and leaned to kiss his on the forehead.
“I’ll be waiting for the news,” Kazuki smiled gently and let Kazuya snuggle to his chest to find the comfort he needed. Kazuki held Kazuya tight and hoped that the best would happen. He knew he would get angry if Jin refused to even listen to Kazuya but at the same time it was somewhat understandable. He probably wouldn’t let a cheater explain anything either.
That is why Kazuki sent a small prayer hoping that some gods would hear it and answer to it.
~.~.~
Kazuya did exactly what he had said to do the next day and followed Jin around trying to get him to listen to him. Unfortunately Jin had Yamapi to help him get away from Kazuya and even though Kazuya could have maybe explained things easier to Yamapi, he wanted to tell everything to Jin first.
“Jin we need to-,” Kazuya once again ran straight to Jin after the lecturer left the lecture hall. It was exactly like had happened on the first lesson.
“There’s nothing we need to do,” Jin cut Kazuya off before the sentence was finished and Yamapi stepped in between them to let Jin get away from the hall while he stopped Kazuya from following him.
“Please Yamapi, I need to talk to him,” Kazuya pleaded with his puppy eyes.
“Aren’t you one bit ashamed?” was Yamapi’s only reply before he left the lecture hall as well. Kazuya had already realized after the first lecture that there was no meaning in trying to follow Yamapi to get to Jin because the other wouldn’t go there. It must have been their silent agreement of the subject to keep Kazuya as far away from Jin as possible.
It hurt Kazuya that the two weren’t even considering hearing him out. They had known each other for only a short moment and Kazuya understood it wasn’t easy to trust someone completely after such a short time. But he thought that because he had always been totally different from someone who would cheat and lie that the two would rather easily listen to him. He was very wrong about that.
Kazuya spent the whole lunch hour trying to find out where Jin and Yamapi were having their lunches but even though Kazuya tried to go through every place possible, he couldn’t find the two. He didn’t dare to ask the other people whether they had seen Jin and Yamapi.
There were rumors going around in the campus but all three of them were ignoring them. But those rumors were the reason why finding Jin was so much harder for Kazuya. If there were no rumors, Kazuya could have asked the other where Jin or Yamapi was but he felt uncomfortable approaching anyone because of the rumors. So Kazuya concentrated all of his energy onto stalking Jin (or at least trying to do so. It was rather hard because of the disappearing tricks) and using every possible moment there was to try and get Jin agree onto listening to him.
Unfortunately Kazuya was still trying to do just that when the final lecture ended and just like that before Kazuya even realized it the school day was over. He still refused to give up, though, and followed Jin to his home hoping that his persistence would finally pay off and Jin would turn around and tell him to talk. That didn’t happen either, though.
“Can you stop following me Kamenashi?” Jin turned to say angrily at Kazuya when the younger one refused to leave him alone. It was hurting him so much to see Kazuya when the younger one had lied to him and cheated on him like that. It was too much for him to take.
Jin felt like he had been about to break down the whole day when Kazuya kept following him and trying to talk to him. On some level he wanted to hear what Kazuya had to say but he was afraid that he would fall into lies and just be cheated on more. It was like he was being made fun off and he couldn’t accept that!
“Please just listen to me and I’ll go,” Kazuya pleaded. He was only two steps away from Jin’s arms and he really just wanted to go and hug Jin and refuse to let go of him. He was afraid, though, what Jin would do to him if he did that. He wasn’t sure if his fragile heart could take Jin pushing him away physically as well.
“I won’t listen to your lies,” Jin squint his eyes looking angrier at Kazuya than ever before. Kazuya swallowed but tried to keep strong.
“I know this sounds like a cliché but it really isn’t like you think!” Kazuya tried to make Jin believe him but it only took a moment for him to realize that Jin didn’t believe him at all. Instead Jin turned around and continued his way home with fast steps.
“Jin please. I can tell you the main truth in 5 words if you just listened to me,” Kazuya hurried after the older one. He was desperate to get Jin listen.
Jin stopped for a moment and almost looked like he was considering Kazuya’s words but then he just continued his way. Kazuya hurried his steps again and kept pleading every few minutes but Jin stayed strong and refused to listen to anything Kazuya had to say.
In the end Kazuya was standing with Jin in front of his front door while Jin was trying open it. “Please Jin, if we meant anything to you, just listen to me. I only need a few minutes to show and tell you everything!” Kazuya pleaded knowing if Jin locked himself inside the apartment there was nothing for him left to do that day. He also believed that Jin would say ok with the phrase he said. He knew they had meant a lot to Jin.
“We used to mean a lot to me but the moment I found out the truth behind that innocent face it lost all the meaning. Get away from me Kamenashi,” Jin said coldly and as he had gotten the door open stepped inside and pulled the door closed.
Inside the apartment Jin leaned against the door and started to think whether he should open the door and give Kazuya the chance he somehow believed the younger one deserved. But no, he couldn’t do it. He had clearly seen what was going on. It was the only logical explanation there was to it. Jin didn’t want to be fooled.
But still the feeling that he should listen to Kazuya was there and he wasn’t sure if he could make it through the day sober. He wondered if he had any beer or any alcohol in the house. He couldn’t remember.
The words from Jin stabbed Kazuya deep into his heart and his feet lost their power. Kazuya soon found himself from the floor feeling empty. It was like his last hope wouldn’t have been crashed into millions of pieces by the words. Why did things have to go this way? Even though Kazuya wanted to regret being born as a twin, he couldn’t. Kazuki was everything he had and he couldn’t wish in any situation that he wouldn’t be the other half of Kazuki.
He didn’t know for how long he sat there in front of Jin’s front door before he found the power to stand up again. The bad thing about Kazuya’s upset mood was that he was really careless then. It was like everything he got upset all thoughts would leave him and he would be on total autopilot for as long as Kazuki dragged him out of the state.
Knowing that deep inside, Kazuya started to walk on autopilot towards the place he knew Kazuki was at, the restaurant where everything had started.
Kazuya seriously couldn’t sense anything from around him. He didn’t see the people, didn’t feel some of the people who crashed onto him, he also didn’t hear the cars or constant talking there was around him. He just walked forward with rather slow steps continuing his way all the time without any stops.
It was dangerous, he knew on some level but that level was too deep down to be able to do anything about the autopilot mode right away. He could have taken out his cell phone and call Kazuki but Kazuya had forgotten all about cell phones even existing.
Suddenly a loud noise did wake him up at least partly from the state he was in and he turned his face towards the sound only seeing a car coming towards him. He had no time to react when he felt something hit his body hard and he was flying.
Kazuya felt no pain and only barely realized what happened before he got lost in the darkness that surrounded him really quickly.
(Here happens what was told in the end of part 2)
~.~.~
Jin was sitting in the ambulance looking at the two guys working around Kazuya. The younger one was so pale and Jin hoped Kazuya would just open his eyes to tell Jin he was really alright. He could forget about everything else, he just wanted to see Kazuya’s smile and kiss him deep. It was only on that moment that Jin realized how much he really loved Kazuya and how he didn’t want to live without the younger one in his life.
“Is he really going to be alright?” Jin asked and didn’t recognize his own voice. It sounded so weak and scared. But that was exactly like he was feeling. He was scared to death that something serious would be wrong with Kazuya.
“He’s not in danger of dying but we can’t say anything about the possible head-trauma before getting to the hospital,” was the answer Jin got from the paramedic. It didn’t make Jin feel any better. Head-traumas were never good news.
“What does that mean?” Jin squealed out. Why did Kazuya have to get in danger like this? Jin was angry at himself for not giving in to the voice telling him to give Kazuya a chance to explain everything. He had no idea how he would live with himself if Kazuya got permanently hurt somehow because of this.
“Sir, please. We’ll tell you when we know something. Let’s stay positive, alright?” The doctor asked and Jin nodded a few times.
“Positive. Yeah,” Jin repeated out loud to make himself believe he could be positive. Kazuya would survive. There would be nothing wrong with him after he woke up. But what if he didn’t wake up? Jin shook his head from side to side to stop the negative thoughts from invading his mind.
A cell phone started to ring somewhere and Jin recognized it as Kazuya’s ringtone. The doctor who had been at the scene by an accident took the device out from Kazuya’s pocket and handed it to Jin after seeing what read on the screen. It was Kazuya’s older brother calling. The doctor seemed too busy for Jin’s liking when he said Kazuya wasn’t in any kind of life-threatening danger.
“Kazuya? Where are you? What happened? I get a really bad feeling,” a panicked voice that sounded very similar to Kazuya’s was asking from the other end of the line. It was the first time Jin heard Kazuya’s older brother’s voice and he couldn’t believe he would have to break the news to the older one.
“Oniisan,” Jin started swallowing hard. He knew how close Kazuya and Kazuya’s older brother were and he wasn’t sure how the older one would react to hear Kazuya had been hit by a car. He didn’t even know how he should tell about it.
“You’re…,” Kazuya’s older brother said like he would have recognized Jin’s voice and just couldn’t believe it was actually Jin on the other end. It was slightly weird but Jin could only think about Kazuya at that moment and missed many weird things.
“I’m Akanishi Jin,” Jin introduced himself. He had imagined this moment for many times but never had it been that way. Kazuya had always been in the imaginations excitedly smiling next to Jin when he got to meet Kazuya’s only family member.
“Where’s Kazuya?” the older brother demanded to know. His voice sounded very worried and the guilt inside Jin grew.
“We… We’re on the way to hospital,” Jin had to force himself to say the words. He hated being the one who had to break the news to the older brother.
“W-what? W-what happened?” The questions came out fast but with a shaky unbelieving voice. Jin could only imagine how to older brother was feeling. Well, he could actually imagine rather well because Kazuya meant a lot for him, too.
“I… I don’t know. I wasn’t… I wasn’t there,” Jin was fighting tears when he said those words. He was blaming himself. He was rather sure that if he had just listened to Kazuya or been with him, the accident wouldn’t have happened and Kazuya wouldn’t be lying on the stretchers all pale. At best they would be laughing at each other if Jin had listened. He didn’t remember anymore the reason why he had refused to listen to his innocent beautiful Kazuya.
“How…was he hurt?” the older brother asked. Usually people asked first if someone was dead in those kinds of situations. Or that’s what Jin had seen in all the dramas and movies. But Kazuya’s older brother was asking how Kazuya was hurt. Because of Jin’s state of mind he missed that weird point as well.
“He… he got hit by a car. They say he’s not in danger but… they’re worried about how badly he hit his head,” Jin gave the information he was given by the doctor and paramedics.
“Kazuya…,” the older brother spoke out his younger brother’s name in a whisper but Jin heard it. He heard the emotions clear from the word as well. Jin could tell how worried the older brother was. “Jin, please stay with Kazuya for as long as I get there,” he pleaded then.
“I will,” Jin promised and didn’t find it one bit weird that Kazuya’s older brother was calling him so intimately by his first name like that.
“Thank you,” was the grateful and relieved answer. “And Jin. There’s a reason for everything that happened. You’ll see,” the older brother added before the line was cut. They were already almost at the hospital so Jin needed to get ready to move.
The last words Kazuya’s older brother said confused Jin a lot but he wasn’t given much time to think when the doors were opened and Kazuya was moved.
Jin followed Kazuya as far as he was let. The nurse brought him to the waiting room while the doctors would check everything about Kazuya. Jin sat in the same position the whole time and got another phone call from Kazuya’s brother who was relieved that Jin still had Kazuya’s phone because he didn’t have Jin’s number.
Apparently the older brother’s boss was being an ass and wouldn’t let him off from work before his shift was over so he pleaded for Jin to stay by Kazuya’s side even if he wouldn’t be able to come before later in the evening. Jin promised to stay there but the truth was that he wouldn’t have left Kazuya’s side even if the older brother would have asked him to do so.
It was about an hour later that Jin was allowed to see Kazuya who had been moved to his room. The doctor explained to Jin how they had stopped Kazuya’s internal bleeding with a small surgery and that there wasn’t any serious brain damage to be seen in the scans taken but because brain was very unpredictable they could only know for sure after Kazuya would wake up. So all there was to do was to wait for Kazuya to wake up and the doctor wasn’t sure when it would happen exactly.
“Wh-what could be wrong with him?” Jin asked feeling nervous. He wasn’t sure if he was ready to hear it but it was better to know beforehand what could happen than find out about it after Kazuya woke up.
“Many things could happen. He might forget about some things or have problems in doing something. It shouldn’t be permanent but we can only say after he wakes up and we can do more tests,” the doctor had explained to him. Jin could only nod and try to not feel too much afraid.
He was left alone in Kazuya’s room and as he saw the small and still pale looking Kazuya lying on the white hospital sheets the tears really fell from his eyes. He walked up to the bed and sat down on the chair next to the bed.
“Kazu… wake up soon,” Jin pleaded taking a hold of Kazuya’s hand and laid his head on the blanket and sobbed there.
~.~.~
It was already late in the evening and Kazuya’s older brother still hadn’t arrived to the hospital. Jin had sat next to Kazuya the whole time holding on to the younger one’s hand. He hadn’t informed anyone about Kazuya’s accident. Truth to be said, a thought of Yamapi hadn’t even crossed his mind. All Jin could do was stare at Kazuya and hope to see some signs of him waking up.
The nurse had stopped by once and Jin had asked him when Kazuya would wake up. She had answered that it could happen any time but it wouldn’t be abnormal even if Kazuya’s waking went to the next day. It got Jin’s mood down slightly but he kept the hope that Kazuya would wake up soon. He had the need to see the younger one awake.
The door suddenly slid open and Jin lifted his face to meet the person who was coming in. Jin froze as it was Kazuya who walked in the room. But it couldn’t be because he was holding onto Kazuya’s hand. Kazuya was unconscious and lying on the hospital bed. Jin turned to look at Kazuya to be sure the younger one was really there. He was. But he was also by the door closing it after getting inside.
“K-Kazuya… h-how?” Jin was so confused when he moved his head from the Kazuya lying on the bed to the Kazuya walking towards them.
“Nice to finally meet you, Jin,” the walking Kazuya voiced out. He had a serious look on his face and when he looked at Kazuya it turned into a sad one. “I’m Kamenashi Kazuki. Kazuya’s twin brother,” the other Kazuya was now standing on the other side of the bed and was introducing himself as Kazuya’s brother. Wait… twin brother.
“B-but… Kazuya had older brother,” Jin could only say. It was the only thing he could think about. Kazuya had an older brother and brothers didn’t look that much alike.
“He has. Me. Though it’s only by 10 minutes,” Kazuki told Jin and gave the confused guy a small smile. Kazuki knew it wasn’t the best moment to tell Jin everything but it couldn’t be avoided.
Jin was staring at the other Kazuya… no, Kazuya’s older brother who was Kazuya’s twin. The small smile he gave at Jin was identical to the one Kazuya had but the look in his eyes was different. Still it was so confusing. Twins? Seriously?
“You… You’re Kazuya’s older brother?” Jin had to ask again to be sure. The whole situation felt very unreal. He couldn’t believe it.
“Yes. And the one to blame of all of this,” Kazuki spoke the guilt that had started to eat him the moment he heard about Kazuya being in the accident. He had been working normally when all of a sudden a real bad feeling filled him making it hard to breath. He was hurting and he knew Kazuya was hurting and it was on some level he had never been hurt before. That’s why Kazuki had made the panicked phone call to get to know what was going on.
“No. I… I should have listened to Kazu!” Jin protested. “If I had this wouldn’t have happened,” Jin almost whispered the words. Kazuki could see Jin was fighting the tears again. But Jin didn’t know the whole truth yet so he couldn’t know who was to be blamed.
“Maybe you should have. But it’s because of my overprotective side that Kazuya still didn’t tell you about us,” Kazuki revealed while stroking Kazuya’s hair gently. The guilt got so much bigger when he saw Kazuya looking so small on the hospital bed.
“What are you saying?” Jin got confused. He had thought that it was some mean joke for Kazuya to keep the twin thing as a secret. He thought that but still he was so worried about Kazuya and just wanted the latter to wake up. He admitted he probably would have yelled at Kazuya after getting over the relief that Kazuya was alright but now he got more confused. Was he or was he not played with?
“He told you we’re from a small town. It was never easy for us. We felt like no one was hanging out with us from honest feelings and it hurt us. Kazuya even thought we were cursed to not be allowed to have real friends and have a normal life and things only got worse after our parents died. We wanted to move on but the people wouldn’t let us. That’s why we moved here and I never wanted to see Kazuya suffering like that again,” Kazuki explained while keeping his eyes on his younger twin the whole time. It physically hurt Kazuki to see Kazuya so pale and unmoving.
“That’s why I made a decision that we both would keep this twin thing as a secret. I wanted to make sure Kazuya would get the normal life he deserves. Then he met you and Yamapi and was really happy to have real friends and later you as his boyfriend. Then he told me he wanted to tell you guys about us but I refused him. I thought you hadn’t known each other for long enough. Now it’s because of my want to protect him that he’s here,” Kazuki spoke rather calmly but tears started to flow from his eyes. It was heartbreaking for Jin to watch as well.
“So… it… it wasn’t… Kazuya on… that day in…,” Jin started to ask hesitantly.
“No. Oh God no. It was me. I work in that restaurant. Kazuya’s the innocent one out of us. He doesn’t go flirting around. That’s all me,” Kazuki hurried to answer Jin’s question before it was even finished. He looked at Jin with pleading eyes that reminded him so much of Kazuya’s as they were identical.
“How… how can people tell you apart?” Jin asked clearing his throat. He found the question to be rather rude but he needed to know. He needed to know to be able to tell which one was his Kazu in the future. He didn’t want to mix Kazu with his older brother.
“There aren’t really any differences between our looks. The only way to tell us apart is our habits and personalities. Apart from our family no one ever went through the trouble to learn to tell us apart,” Kazuki shared and Jin started to feel sorry for the twins. He understood Kazuya and Kazuki were two different people but when people rather saw them as one it must have been really offending.
Jin didn’t find anything to say in the situation, though, so silence fell upon them. Jin was deep in thought when suddenly Kazuki started to move. When Jin lifted his head he saw how Kazuki was moving Kazuya to the side.
“What are you doing?” Jin stood up slightly scandalized about what was happening. Kazuki finished moving Kazuya and got on the bed after removing his shoes and lay down next to Kazuya wrapping an arm around Kazuya’s waist.
“We’ve long ago discovered that when we’re sick we heal faster when the other is as close as possible. No one can explain it but that’s also the reason the doctors are allowing me to stay here the whole time. I will probably lose my job, though, but I need to stay by Kazuya’s side until he gets better,” Kazuki told Jin but his eyes were still on Kazuya the whole time.
“I… didn’t know about that,” Jin sat down back on the bed feeling slightly useless. Kazuki’s presence would make Kazuya heal faster but what was he doing there? Was there anything good about his company to Kazuya?
“I know it’s hard to understand the bond between twins but… you’re very important to Kazuya. He might not be able to tell you that you’re his most important person in this universe but his feelings for you are still very real and strong,” Kazuki explained the best he could but it was impossible. Still, he felt like he owned it for Kazuya to try and fix things between the two.
He gave Jin the time to think through everything he had learnt in a short time and just concentrated on Kazuya who was breathing evenly like he was asleep. It only was that he was still so pale.
“If… I do your shift tomorrow I can be useful, right?” Jin asked suddenly. Kazuki turned to look at his brother’s boyfriend and could see he had been thinking of the situation and remembered all the details. He really was into Kazuya. Kazuki was happy to notice that.
“I think that’s the only way I could still have my job,” Kazuki admitted.
“Then I’ll go tomorrow and do your shift. You stay with Kazu and make sure he gets well,” Jin said determined.
“Kazuya really chose the right person to fall in love with,” Kazuki smiled fully accepting Jin even as a part of the family if the two decided to be so serious in the future. He still thought it was way too early for Kazuya and Jin to take any big steps like a real overprotective brother he was supposed to be.
Jin blushed at the words and lowered his head to hide it. Although Kazuki looked exactly like Kazuya and was only 10 minutes older than Kazuya, there was still the clear older brother aura around him and to hear that he was somewhat accepted by someone who was Kazuya’s only family was making him embarrassed like he would be in front of Kazuya’s parents.
The nurse came to tell Jin he had to go home some time later and so he and Kazuki only agreed about Jin going to the restaurant to work Kazuki’s shift and then meet in the hospital after the shift was over.
~.~.~
Kazuya woke up the next day in the early afternoon about an hour after the lunch was served. Kazuki was provided a lunch by the hospital, too, as he was allowed to stay by Kazuya’s side as the twin treatment. So he lied the whole day next to Kazuya watching TV. And that’s why noticed right away when Kazuya started to stir awake.
“Kazuya?” Kazuki sat up on the bed and took Kazuya’s hand in his. Kazuya was trying to open his eyes but the light was hurting his eyes so he had to open and close his eyes for some times before he was able to hold his eyes open and get Kazuki in his sight.
“J-J-Ji…n?” Kazuya voiced out the first thing. Kazuki understood it wasn’t to call if Jin was the one in the room calling for him. He knew it was a question for him asking where Jin was.
“Jin’s at the restaurant working in my place so that I’m able stay here by your side,” Kazuki explained to the tired looking Kazuya.
“Jin… there? I… tasted,” Kazuya said making Kazuki frown. Kazuya’s speaking was weird. It seemed like it took a lot of energy from him to form words and his words didn’t make too much sense to an outsider. Kazuki could guess what Kazuya was talking about but he was worried.
“You mean you heard Jin here?” Kazuki asked. Kazuya nodded and seemed to realize himself as well that his speech was abnormal. He turned his eyes to Kazuki after having been looking around in the room and Kazuki could see fear in them.
“I’ll call the doctor. I’m sure it’s only temporary, don’t worry,” Kazuki gave his usual smile that calmed Kazuya down and it seemed to work that time as well. Kazuki turned over to press the button to call the doctor. The nurse had told him to do so when Kazuya would wake up.
A few minutes later the doctor came to the room with a nurse following. He gave a smile to the twins who were both still lying on the bed. The only way he could tell them apart were the clothes as Kazuya was wearing the hospital gown.
“How are we feeling here?” the doctor asked going through the papers telling all the possible changes in Kazuya’s situation.
“Tyre,” Kazuya pronounced. The doctor stopped the page flipping midway and turned his eyes towards Kazuya in slight surprise.
“He means he’s tired. I think something’s wrong with his speaking,” Kazuki translated as the doctor didn’t seem to realize what was going on.
“A… I see. We’ll have to make some tests then if that’s alright with you,” the doctor smiled in understanding. Kazuya only nodded in agreement he seemed reluctant talking because of the speaking problem. Kazuki hoped it really was something temporary as he was still hoping for a normal life to his brother.
“Then I must ask your brother to stand up so that we can take you,” the doctor kept the friendly smile on his face and Kazuki did as he was told. Kazuya turned his nervous eyes to his brother clearly afraid to go alone to do the examinations.
“Don’t be scared, Kazuya. I’ll be right here waiting for you to come back,” Kazuki encouraged while the nurse was preparing to move the bed.
Kazuya didn’t speak much to other people during the whole day. The nurses came often and tried to speak with Kazuya but the boy kept his mouth shut and only agreed to talk with Kazuki because he felt ashamed that he couldn’t speak. But he was waiting for Jin to come feeling both excited and frightened. Kazuki hadn’t told Kazuya more than that he and Jin had talked but to other questions he answered that Kazuya should discuss about them with Jin.
Kazuya told how he wanted to talk so much with Jin if he really was listening to them now. But at the same time he felt sad because he wasn’t able to talk. He had been trying to get his chance to explain so hard but had been refused the whole time and now when he had the chance he couldn’t speak so that people could understand him.
Kazuya’s long wait was awarded when Jin finally came in while they were watching TV. Jin looked slightly worried when he stepped inside but his face brightened when he saw that Kazuya had woken up. Jin had been scared that he would come and Kazuya would still be sleeping and he would be told that something had gone wrong with Kazuya while he was working for Kazuki.
“It’s time for me to go and have some real food,” Kazuki said and jumped off the bed. “Take care of him. He has temporary speech problems that make his speaking hard to understand,” Kazuki told Jin on his way out and closed the door behind him.
The news took Jin aback for awhile but the main point was Kazuya was awake and he only had temporary problems. That was all that mattered for Jin because he hadn’t lost any part of Kazuya in the accident though it had been looking rather bad from Jin’s point of view.
“I’m glad you’ve woken up,” Jin opened the conversation after about one minute of silence. “I was so scared when I saw you lying on the street,” he walked hesitantly closer and sat down on the chair where he had sat the previous day as well.
“Jin f-fi-wi-fin---ding me?” Kazuya asked looking for the right word with what looked like a lot of work. Jin got slightly startled by this though Kazuki had told him Kazuya had problems with speaking. It was still different to actually hear it himself.
“There were other people there but I came to see and… I came to the hospital with you,” Jin told the younger one. He took Kazuya’s hand into his and it was like the misunderstanding between them had been all forgotten.
“I hiss Jin,” Kazuya said next in tears as he was squeezing Jin’s hand hard like he was afraid to let go of it. Jin felt mixed emotions as he was confused about what Kazuya said but at the same time he felt sad to see Kazuya’s tears. Jin stood up and sat down on the bed holding on to Kazuya’s hand.
“You mean miss?” Jin asked gently to be sure while bringing his free hand to stroke Kazuya’s face and dry the few fallen tears away. Kazuya nodded and leaned into Jin’s touch.
“Jin still hungry? H-hate?” Kazuya pronounced the words carefully trying his best to get the right words but looked like he was sure he had failed in it. Jin got confused of the first question but the second one-word question helped him to understand what Kazuya was trying to ask.
“Kazuki-kun explained many things to me,” Jin answered though he wasn’t actually answering the question asked. “I understand your situation better but… let’s talk about this after you’re fully recovered. I just want to see you healthy,” Jin finished still not giving Kazuya the answer whether he was angry or not.
Kazuya nodded and closed his eyes trying to prevent the tears from falling but didn’t succeed in it. Jin had the right to be angry, Kazuya knew. He just didn’t want Jin to leave him. The older one clearly still cared a lot for him but it didn’t mean he would be able to forgive Kazuya for hiding things from him. And right now Kazuya wasn’t able to have a conversation because of the stupid speaking problem. That meant that he had to wait.
Jin saw the tears falling from Kazuya’s eyes and his heart twisted painfully. He leaned forward to hug Kazuya as tightly as he dared.
“I love you, Kazu. I just need to hear everything from your mouth,” Jin spoke in a low voice just next to Kazuya’s ear. Kazuya froze for a moment but then started to cry harder fisting Jin’s shirt in between his fingers. It was the first time Jin said those words to him. He wanted to answer so badly but he was afraid his words would change into something totally different and decided against confessing. He would do it after his speaking was back to normal.
“Why are you crying, Kazu? I hate to see you cry,” Jin pulled back and cupped Kazuya’s face in his palms to look worriedly at the younger on in the eyes. “Please don’t cry anymore,” Jin pleaded and showed his kicked puppy dog eyes hoping it would make Kazuya laugh.
It did. Kauzya let out a laugh but the tears were still falling. He was just so happy that Jin was there by his side and said that he loved him. Kazuya just didn’t want to make Jin misunderstand him or doubt him in any way so he rather didn’t speak out loud.
For the first time on that day Kazuya took the notebook and a pencil from the table next to his bed. The doctor had said it might be easier for him to write because Kazuya did know the words. They just got mixed up when he was supposed to speak them out loud. So Kazuya took the pencil and opened the note book. He had refused to write so far because it would mean he really couldn’t talk and that would make him look pathetic.
‘Happy’ Kazuya wrote looked at the word for a few moments to make sure it was the right word but still he wasn’t completely sure. His brain was confused because of all the words he hadn’t managed to voice out the right way.
“You’re happy?” Jin confirmed after reading the word and Kazuya nodded. Then he started to write more to tell his feelings to Jin from that moment.
“I want to talk but I’m afraid you’ll misunderstand me,” Jin read out loud. Jin took the notebook and a pencil away from Kazuya and landed them back on the table.
“I’m happy you consider me like this but if you hate writing in that thing, don’t write just because of me. I’ll manage to understand you somehow no matter what comes out from your mouth,” Jin promised making Kazuya really happy.
“Sank you,” Kazuya smiled but Jin burst out laughing.
“I’m sorry. I know you can’t help it and I don’t mean to make fun of you or anything but… I just realized how funny things you can let out now and then because of this,” Jin tried to stop chuckling. Kazuya was looking at Jin like the older on lost his head.
“Sorry, sorry I’ll stop,” Jin promised and cleared his throat to get control of his voice but then Kazuya started to giggle and Jin burst out laughing again.
“I’m glad to see you two so happy,” Kazuki spoke from the door having returned too silently for the two to hear him.
“Neechan,” Kazuya smiled brightly towards his older brother but the suddenly took a pondering expression before he started laughing again. Jin had also stopped for a second and waited for Kazuya’s reaction after the word. He couldn’t help himself from laughing when Kazuya started to laugh.
“Yeah, right. I feel like I’m being made fun off even though Kazuya can’t help the mistakes,” Kazuki tsk’ed and walked to sit on the chair on the other side of the bed. Jin also moved down from the bed to the chair he had been sitting on just earlier.
The two just continued giggling and Kazuki couldn’t help the smile spreading on his lips as well. Somehow the situation made him feel like he really was the older brother and the feeling wasn’t all that bad. Hopefully he would get an upper hand on Jin because of it.
~.~.~
Some months later
It was a beautiful warm day and everything was rather normal. Kazuya’s speaking got as perfect as it had been before the accident really quickly and he recovered in other ways as well as he had gotten some scars and hurting muscles from the hit he got. The first thing he did after he noticed he could speak normally again was to tell Jin he loved him. And after that Kazuya told everything from his and Kazuki’s past to the present from his point of view. It was a lot similar with Kazuki’s but Jin still liked it that he had heard everything from Kazuya in so many details.
After the talk Jin and Kazuya had things returned to the normal. Only difference was that now Jin knew that Kazuya and his older brother were identical twins and was trying hard to learn to tell them apart. He was pretty good at it already but sometimes got confused. They also told Yamapi about Kazuki and he was very surprised to hear the truth. He also was mad at Jin for not calling him when Kazuya got in to a hospital because of the car accident. Jin could only apologize and try to explain that the thought of Yamapi hadn’t even crossed his mind before he had looked at his cell phone again after some days and seen all those missed calls Yamapi had sent him when he didn’t come to school.
Kazuya was happy every day as he had a good friend, a boyfriend and his brother had also finally gotten on the long awaited date with the regular customer he had been flirting with. It seemed to be going rather well so far. Plus Kazuki could relax when he could see how happy Kazuya was.
In that very beautiful morning not everyone was happy, though. The one to make the exception was one Kamenashi Kazuki whose mood had been ruined that very morning by just a few written words on a piece of a paper.
Kazuki marched to the campus area he had never been before but had heard about so many times from Kazuya. He was furious but he hid it rather well, saving it to the one who ruined his mood. He would find one certain Akanishi Jin and skin him alive even if it was the last thing he would do. How dare that bastard!! With these thoughts in mind Kazuki made his way further in the campus area.
It was lunch time and most students were outside in the good weather enjoying their lunches in different places. He had heard from Kazuya that Jin was popular in the campus area so he stopped two girls who were laughing.
“Where’s Akanishi?” Kazuki asked. He felt too angry to call Jin by his first name. The girls looked at each other in confusion before returned their gazes to Kazuki.
“Weren’t you just with him?” the other girl questioned confused. It was natural, Kazuya was with Jin and no one knew Kazuya had a twin.
“Where?” Kazuki gritted through his teeth and the girls pointed towards a direction they had been coming from. Kazuki hurried to the said direction. He was fisting a piece of paper in his hand so hard his knuckles had turned white.
Kazuki came to an almost park like area with lots of trees and benches. He stopped and scanned the area to find who he was looking for. There were many students enjoying the warm beautiful weather but Kazuki went through every single one of them patiently.
There!
His eyes locked on the happy figure that was holding Kazuya by his side with an arm around his shoulders. A friend of them, Yamapi, was laughing at whatever Jin was saying while Kazuya had a happy smile on his face. Happy or not, Kazuki would not agree onto this!
By then many students had already noticed that there were two Kazuyas suddenly in the area. Kazuki started to walk towards the three who were yet to notice his presence.
“Akanishi!” Kazuki yelled out in anger when he was close enough. Kazuya and Jin froze on their spots and turned their heads slowly to Kazuki. Kazuya because he recognized Kazuki’s voice right away and knew exactly what was going on and Jin because of the angry tone. The two stood up and stepped slightly away from each other. “What the hell is this?!” Kazuki screamed and threw the paper he had been fisting in his hand at Jin.
“Niichan,” Kazuya breathed out realizing what paper it was. He had written it, after all, and left for Kazuki to read that morning before leaving for school.
Many students had gathered around them to stare, mostly because it was the first time they saw two Kazuyas and they had no idea what on earth was going on. Kazuki could understand that but he wouldn’t care less. He had a mission. And that mission was to skin Jin alive.
“O-Oniisan,” Jin stumbled with his words after seeing what the paper was about. Jin was still calling Kazuki as older brother, though in reality Jin was older than him. They all still agreed that Kazuki had the aura of an older brother and really acted like he was older than them.
“Don’t you ‘oniisan’ me you asshole!” Kazuki continued yelling. “He’s only 20 years old! How dare you do something like this?!?!” he added as if it was argument enough.
“Y-You’re 20 years old as well,” Jin reminded him quietly but it didn’t make any difference. Not to Kazuki and definitely not because of what read in the paper.
“Shut up!” Kazuki screamed so loud Jin flinched and really shut his mouth. Yamapi was staring at Kazuki as it was the first time he met the older brother of Kazuya’s. He knew by then, of course, that they were twins but to see the twins for the first time he was really amazed by the similar looks and scared to death by the scary aura. “I’m not the one being asked to get engaged for marriage which, by the way, is illegal in Japan!” Kazuki wasn’t losing any of his energy and his voice stayed both loud and angry.
“Niichan… calm down,” Kazuya decided to walk to his older brother then and wrapped his arms around the older one partly to keep him still before Kazuki decided to launch himself at Jin and hurt him physically and partly to calm him down.
“You know I love him, oniisan,” Jin took a few steps closer to the twins to show he wasn’t too much afraid though the fear was in his eyes. Still he was brave enough to get closer to the older brother whose approval he needed to be able to be with Kazuya.
“I know but he’s too young to do this now,” Kazuki protested having calmed slightly down because of Kazuya hugging him like that. But the anger was still there hidden under the surface and he knew he would blow up if Jin said one wrong word.
“I bet to you he’s never going to be old enough to take this step,” Jin muttered.
“Say that again Akanishi!” Kazuki’s fury flamed again with that comment and he heard how Kazuya sent silent curses to Jin who realized his mistake. Yamapi started to laugh on the background. Kazuki wanted Kazuya to be happy, get married even if that was possible in some way, but not when he was 20 years old and had only known his boyfriend for five months.
“You just want to keep Kazuya to yourself. You’re his brother but you act like his parent. You both are already 20 years old and well capable of making your own decisions,” Jin shot back at Kazuki wanting to speak what he felt.
Kazuki froze of those words. It was the truth. He hadn’t meant to become Kazuya’s parent because he loved being Kazuya’s brother but somehow when the responsibility of Kazuya had been set on his shoulders he had become a parent like figure to the younger one. Parent or brother he still wouldn’t agree onto what Jin was trying to do.
“We’re not going to leave you behind. I understand you two need to be close to each other. That’s why we’re looking for big enough apartment for all of us to stay at,” Jin told in hope to calm Kazuki down and for a moment it really looked like it. Kazuki blinked a few times to understand what was said and Kazuya seemed to be only one who could feel the coming danger.
Jin was already smiling and turned to Yamapi to show a victory sign of speaking over the over-protective brother when something snapped. Yamapi saw it when Jin was still in his happiness and started to show Jin signs to run away which the Bakanishi couldn’t understand at all.
“AKANISHI!!!!!!” Kazuki yelled in rage and broke free from Kazuya’s hold preparing to beat the grab out of Jin who realized the danger and started to run for his live. Kazuya would have wanted to stop Kazuki but at the same time, he also agreed it was too early for him and Jin to move further in their relationship so he decided to let Kazuki give Jin a lesson.
“Is he… really that much against you guys?” Yamapi walked to Kazuya to ask from the younger one while they were looking at how Jin was being chased by furious Kazuki. To an outsider it probably looked like Kazuki didn’t like the fact that Jin and Kazuya were together, although it was the complete opposite.
“No. It’s because we’ve only known each other for 5 months and so he’s not happy about us moving that fast. Moving in together and getting engaged for marriage are like the two biggest steps in life for us and Kazuki especially hates people who take them too lightly which is exactly what Jin is doing,” Kazuya explained.
“You could have told that to him,” Yamapi reminded and blinked a few times to understand everything.
“I could have. But he’s too stubborn to understand. Also, it gives a nice show, don’t you think?” Kazuya grinned at Yamapi knowing Kazuki wouldn’t hurt Jin too badly but that he would only be satisfied after Jin would understand how big of a thing they were talking about.
“You’re right. It’s rare to see Jin screaming and running for his life like that,” Yamapi laughed and Kazuya joined it.
“I’M GOING TO KILL YOU AKANISHI JIN!” Kazuki’s scream could be heard even after the two disappeared from the sight.
The End
~.~.~
This is the story. Hope you all liked it ^^
Those waiting for If You're the One sequel. I have made progress but there are still some pages I need to write. It will most likely take over one week before I could get it done but I'll try! Hope you have patience to wait for it a little while longer!
Thank you everyone and I would really like to read what you think about this ^o^ So, leave a comment please? *puppy dog eyes*