Meet the new boss
Yesterday, the largest, most powerful religious organization on the planet chose a new leader.
I'd like to take this opportunity to extend my best wishes to my catholic friends, in the hope that their faith will continue to flourish.
If it were me, however, I'd be worried.
It seems to me that God is an awfully busy guy. He must spend a great deal of time talking to Important People, because they are always letting us know what He has told them. Strangely enough, it usually seems to involve ways that they can become more powerful and wealthy.
God wants you to send me money.
God wants you to buy my book.
God wants you to vote for my candidate.
God wants you to watch my television show.
God wants you to come to church and tithe.
God wants you to convince more people to do the same.
God rarely seems to tell these Important People anything that would involve them sacrificing their own resources or positions of power for the betterment of the rest of His followers. I've never seen them sell one of their cars in order to keep a food kitchen operating for another few months, or admit to doing anything that their congregation would take offense to...unless they are caught, in which case God wants us to forgive them.
Even common folk seem to converse with God on occasion. They pray for guidance. Strangely, that guidance generally seems to be telling them what they already believe. But somehow, by asking God about it and getting confirmation, it becomes unarguable. After all, it's not their will, but God's. And you can't argue with that. Uh, unless maybe God told you the opposite of what He told them.
God doesn't want you dating my daughter.
God doesn't think I should loan you money.
God wants you to drive me to the revival because my car broke down.
God wants you to give me a microwave.
God wants me to keep this baby.
God wants me to break up with you.
God says you are wrong and I am right.
But anyway, back to the new pope. The holiest of holy men in the Catholic church, the Princes of the Church, as they are called, gathered in Rome to select a new pope. 115 cardinals from 52 countries. They met in the famed Sistine Chapel, under the gaze of a painted God and, presumably, the real one as well.
If anyone truly hears the voice of God, surely these men do. Surely when these men gather together in order to make a decision that affects the fate of their entire faith and indeed the future of the world, they should be able to call upon the voice of the divine to guide their decision.
I mean, they wouldn't do something as simple as VOTE on it, would they?
And even if they did, the vote would likely be unanimous, right? If the same voice was speaking to all of them, it would presumably be telling them the same thing. You wouldn't expect them to have to vote more than once.
They did, of course, vote. And more than once. As a matter of fact, they voted several times over the course of two days before finally coming to an agreement. As Pope Benedict XVI (aka the Cardinal formerly known as Joseph Ratzinger) accepted the position, he acknowledged that he was experiencing feelings of "inadequacy and an inner disquiet."
Excuse me? Feelings of inadequacy?
I'm guessing that he didn't mention these feelings to the other 114 cardinals when he was schmoozing them for votes. "Please vote for me, although I feel I'm inadequate for the position."
Perhaps I'm going to hell, but it seems to me that the catholic church is just like any other large organization. The people who are the best at political maneuvering will rise to the top - and that means corruption and dealmaking and a complete lack of true devotion to the individuals who make up the base that the powerful stand on.
No, I would make a terrible catholic. If I can't have faith in the highest authority of the church, how can I put my coins in the donation bowl of the local priest without worrying that he'll be using them on a down payment for a new boat. Or maybe just a pack of condoms.