the thunderstorm came, J2 AU, 1/1, [PG-13]
Title: the thunderstorm came
PDF of verse to date to come
Author: sandymg
Beta: borgmama1of5
Summary: A thunderstorm shakes Jensen’s life. (part of the beach!verse)
Wordcount: 2,300 - one-shot
Genre: RPS, J2 AU, H/C, Angst
Characters/Pairings: Jared/Jensen
Rating/Warnings: PG-13 (past emotional child abuse)
Disclaimer: This is fiction. No harm intended. No profit made.
A/N: Story title from the poem A Howling Hermit by Suchoon Mo.
A/N2: Verse can be read chronologically or in the order written starting with past indifferent seagulls. This story follows blows out truth chronologically.
AO3
the thunderstorm came
Jensen doesn’t know why Jared is standing outside his door. “Jared. Hey. You know, I don’t think tonight’s a good night.”
Jared’s hand on the frame is keeping Jensen from being able to shut the door. Ignoring Jensen’s words, Jared speaks around him to address Danni, who has come up behind Jensen. “What’s up?”
“Storm’s coming,” she answers.
Jensen blinks, wondering what the hell she told Jared. Jared and Danni spoke way more than he was comfortable with. Busybodies. “Danni,” he growls at his roommate menacingly. It’s a warning. A plea. He’s not even sure himself.
“Let him in, Jensen.”
“Jen?”
“I’m just not great company tonight … better you should go home.”
Jared doesn’t move, and Jensen looks up at him. Wouldn’t anybody else have left already? Why wasn’t he taking a hint? Sure, they’d spent most nights together since meeting two weeks ago. But it’s not like Jared should expect that he could spend the night whenever he wanted. There still had to be boundaries. It wasn’t serious or anything. He’d already told Jared he didn’t do that. They were just fucking after all.
Danneel touches his arm. “Jense, I called him.”
Surprised, he turns back to Danni and doesn’t notice that Jared is now holding the door open himself, body partway in. Waiting.
“Why?” He fights back the irritation. “You wanna fuck him, too?”
She frowns at him. “No, dorkazoid, I have to leave.”
Jared coughs, drawing both their attention. “I kinda don’t know what I’m doing here. If Jensen wants to be alone then we should respect that.”
The slight rumble starts in the distance. Low and trembling and Jensen doesn’t want to feel it vibrate in his bones. But he does. He steps away and holds the nearby countertop, pushing his hand hard against it so that its steadiness can ground him.
Jensen, don’t be silly. No, you can’t sleep here. It’s just a storm.
Mommy, I’m scared.
You’ve been out in the rain. You know it’s nothing but water. Back to bed.
But I’m scared.
Now, Jensen. Back to your room right now!”
“Jen?” Jared’s voice brakes his trance and Jensen looks at him and then Danneel.
“I don’t need a babysitter.” His mutter may be less than convincing. He hopes Jared doesn’t notice.
“I know that.” Danneel’s warm brown eyes capture his.
Jensen what are you doing here?
I was scared of the storm. Can I come in?
My momma is on the phone. I think your mother is looking for you.
I don’t care. I don’t want to go home. Please let me stay here.
They hid under Danni’s blankets, protected from the lightening and the howls of heaven that made Jensen’s heart leap out of his chest with every cracking roar. Water dripped off him, soaking her bed, making her Hello Kitty pajamas damp where they pressed tight against him.
The bedroom door opened and Danneel’s mama sounded sad as she told Jensen his mother was coming to get him. That he couldn’t stay.
“I have to go out. And you and Jared have been … getting along. Let him stay, Jense. Let him in.”
He stares at his oldest friend hard. He hates her a little bit just then.
Jared settles into the sofa clearly uncomfortable. Jensen doesn’t understand why Jared didn’t just leave in the first place. Jensen wouldn’t have stayed past the first request to leave. But then Jared isn’t like him.
Jared watches him with subtle curiosity.
As soon as Danni leaves Jensen offers Jared a beer but doesn’t have one himself. Makes it worse. A white flash illuminates the room. Jensen braces. Holds the back of the sofa and refuses to acknowledge the flinch as the sonorous boom fills the small space.
There are only a few really bad thunderstorms each summer, even living close to the beach. He’s gotten used to normal storms. Quick ones that pound at his temples and then mercifully release him.
“It’s getting bad out there,” Jared says.
Jensen shrugs. “Just rain.” He ignores the distant din even as he thinks it’s creeping closer. He eyes Jared and raises an eyebrow. “So … bedroom?”
Briefly he is surprised they are still dressed. They have the place to themselves and last night suddenly seems like it was long ago.
Jared looks him over. “Gonna finish my beer.”
“Whatever.”
He walks toward the window behind the sofa and looks out defiantly. His anger toward Danneel is growing. He didn’t need a fucking babysitter. So storms put him in a bad mood. So the fuck what? He never claimed to be perfect. Far from it.
Turning back to Jared his eyes narrow. Either the dude wants to fuck or he needs to go.
Jared has shifted around to keep his eyes on Jensen.
“Jen?” The voice is soft, tentative. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. Nothing is wrong. An’ why do you call me that?”
“What?”
“Why do you keep shortening my name?”
“It’s just … a nickname, I guess. You call me Jay.”
“I do?”
Jared’s face reddens. “In bed.”
Huh. Jensen guesses this is true but didn’t realize it until now. “Want me to stop?”
“Calling me Jay?”
“Yeah.”
Jared looks at him with that same puzzled stare. “No.”
The flash of lightening is so sharp Jensen feels the static raise the hairs on his arms. Shit. Moments later the boom shakes through the room like a boulder toppling wildly off a cliff. He moves next to the couch and his fingers grip its back until his knuckles go white.
“Jensen,” Jared says carefully. “Why not sit down.”
You will sit here, young man. You will sit right here and not move until I tell you to. Do you understand?
Pl … ease let me go to bed.
No. You will not move.
He sat shivering in the kitchen. His mother wouldn’t let him in the living room because his clothes were dripping and would damage the fabric and then she’d really be mad.
How dare you go over there and embarrass me in front of Dana like that? What do you think she thinks now that my boy runs away in the middle of the night? Afraid of a storm. Bah. Life has real things to throw at you. Being scared of weather? When will you grow up?
I’m cold, Mommy.
She stared at him, face still twisted.
Go put on your pajamas and then come right back here. You hear me?
He raced to his room just as the next explosion shook the very foundations of the house. He knew he had to stop whimpering. Couldn’t let her hear … With shaking hands he peeled the wet material away from his skin. He dried off as best he could with his blanket and then put on his Spider Man pajamas. He eyed his bed. At least there he could hide like he had at Danni’s house. She’d said to do that. Said that the blankets would protect him just like they protected her. Said he’d be safe that way.
Reluctantly he returned to the kitchen. His mother stood waiting.
Sit on this chair, Jensen.
She stood in front of him, hands on her hips and face set in a rigid scowl.
I want you to think long and hard about your behavior.
With that she raised her hand to the light switch and flicked it off. The eerie shimmer of the lightning flashes strobing outside filled the room. A roaring thunderclap resonated around them. Jensen screeched and watched, terrified, as his mother turned to walk away.
No. Let me go to bed, please. Mommy … I don’t want to stay here. Please.
You will sit in that chair until I come and get you. I want you to think about what you did wrong and how it’s never going to happen again. You could have been hurt running outside like that in this storm. It was foolish and inexcusable.
The room lit up and his mother’s countenance was highlighted, her blue eyes glowing black for a moment before she was swallowed in shadow. The immediate boom made Jensen yelp in terror. He jumped down and flung himself around his mother’s leg.
Strong hands stripped him away and put him back on the chair.
Not another sound, Jensen. Sit and think.
“Jensen?” A hand touches him gently. He looks at it blankly. Warmth rises up his arm as Jared rubs back and forth in small, even strokes.
“Yeah, Jay?”
Heaven howls again. Jensen swallows the sound … biting back any response, any hint that he hears it, feels it. Arms surround him, drawing him in. Instinct has him stiffen, muscles tightening in defensive mode. The embrace is warm and trembling and alive like a living blanket. He wants to sink in, dive, bury himself until the vicious booming stops.
“I don’t like storms, either,” Jared whispers directly into his ear. The hot puff of breath raises goose bumps.
“Y-you don’t?” he finally manages to squeak out through a throat clamped shut.
“Nope. Scare me.”
Jensen pulls back. He can’t imagine Jared scared of anything. He’s fearless. It’s one of the thousand reasons Jensen tells himself daily this will never work.
“I told Danni that,” Jared continues. “I thought that was why she invited me over.” He laughs and it’s not Jared’s normal laugh but Jensen isn’t really himself enough to think about that.
“She say anything else?” Jensen asks cautiously.
Jared still has his hands on him, holding onto his biceps as if he needs Jensen’s support to keep him up. Jensen wonders at this a moment. Thinks he should feel caged in but he doesn’t. “She said that when she was little she’d hide under a pile of blankets during thunderstorms.”
Outside the world shakes again. An angry, belching sound that steals Jensen’s breath. He brings his arms up and touches Jared’s arms the way Jared is holding his. “Dogs hate thunderstorms,” he says. Even as the words pass his lips he knows how apropos of nothing that is.
But Jared smiles. “I know.” His lips twist slightly. “You calling me a dog, Ackles?”
Jensen’s lips quirk up. “Well you are kinda shaggy.”
Jared mocks attacking him at this, but it doesn’t last long and in seconds their lips are locked and Jensen feels the heat of Jared’s body wrap itself around him. He tastes mint and sugar and a hint of ketchup. But the blend only gets sweeter the longer they kiss. Teeth nipping at Jensen’s full lower lip, Jared asks, “Do I have hotdog breath?”
To which Jensen chuckles and dives back in.
They touch and pull and nip and lick and Jensen’s not even aware they’ve moved until he feels the bed against the back of his knees. Jared’s tugging off his own shirt and Jensen is distracted by the broadness of his shoulders, the perfection of his pecs, the definition of his abs before he wakes himself up and starts working on Jared’s belt.
They are down to their briefs when the thunder splits the air into a thousand exploding shards. Jensen shivers with a mute cry. Strong arms draw him under the blanket and wrap him in a cocoon of warmth and safety. He clings before he can stop himself; flushing when he realizes his erection is gone and that something like a mewl left his lips.
Have to be quiet.
“Jen, it’s okay. We have time. Later. When the storm’s over. Okay?”
“Can I stay in bed?”
“Of course.”
It’s directly overhead now and the pounding is cacophonous. Relentless wrath like a jackhammer with no start and no end, revolving madly in a furious rumble.
Fifteen minutes. That’s how long she’d kept him in the kitchen. It might have been hours. Days. Sitting in the dark in the spotless room. Linoleum gleaming underfoot. The refrigerator moaning softly in sympathy with the sounds the little boy wasn’t allowed to make.
She walked him silently to his bedroom. Watched as he climbed in and pulled his stuffed bunny toward him.
You still have that old thing? Aren’t you getting a bit old for that?
He clung to it in panic as she came closer but she only pulled the blanket up over them both and even gave a little smile. She squeezed the covers tight around his shoulders and he reached up because he didn’t know how not to and tugged on her robe sleeve.
I’m sorry, Mommy.
I know you are. Sleep well, honey.
The storm’s receding. Moving past with a slow last murmur, a lover’s final throes. Jared’s grip never falters. Jensen reaches out and pushes Jared’s hair back from his eyes. They glow midnight blue in the dim light. “Jay … I’m sorry I told you to leave earlier.”
Jared leans in and kisses his lips gently murmuring, “Hush. It’s fine.”
“Will you … will you stay?”
Jensen doesn’t know why he asks that. It’s not like he’s asked any other night. Jared just doesn’t leave.
“Yes. I will. I’ll be right here.”
Jensen settles into Jared’s shoulder, inhaling his scent. Salty and warm like the beach he loves so much. They should be getting to the fucking about now. But Jensen feels exhausted. Almost like it’s already happened. Jared is rubbing his back gently, fingers dancing in what feel like little heart-shapes over his skin.
And Jensen lets his mind empty and the storm move on.
fin
Continues chronologically in nothing out of something
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Howling Hermit
by Suchoon Mo
his mind was empty
his heart was resonant
the thunder storm came
he sat still and howled like a demon
the storm was gone
he opened his eyes and became mute