The mysterious blogger returns!
It seems like every time I post here, I begin with "it's been almost a year since I last wrote" and a lot of catching up has to be done. Luckily not much has actually changed between the last update and this one. :) My long-term subbing job at the elementary school finished in November, and I went back to daily subbing- this time in both counties instead of just one. The elementary schoolers were incredibly sweet, intelligent, thoughtful kids, and at a good age for me to teach if I were ever to do the primary grades- old enough to reason well and hold a less child-like conversation, but young enough to have that innocence and trust still. I do think I am not quite meant for the younger kids, though. We enjoyed each other a lot, but it took me a good four weeks to just get my bearings, figuring out what happens in a day and how things are supposed to go. I have no elementary-level training, and although apparently I'm good at covering that up, it's uncomfortable for me- and probably unfair to the students too, to have someone who doesn't specialize in teaching them. I am still signed up to sub there on a daily basis when needed, but was happy to move on to the "big kids," the teenagers I really feel I have a niche with.
I am still truly enjoying being a substitute teacher. I'm considering doing it for one more year while I take classes to renew my teaching certification, and then campaigning more actively for a full-time position. The only thing I don't enjoy about subbing is the reactions I get from other people (acquaintances, mostly) now that I've been doing it for two and a half years. People have started to ask me "what I'm doing these days" and expecting that I'll say I've moved on to a full-time position, and although they are very polite and supportive and don't say this outright, I am still sensing a bit of confusion- or even disappointment- when I tell people that I'm still subbing. (It's part of why I play up how much I enjoy it when I tell people about my job- the enthusiasm isn't disingenuous, but it's my way of putting it in a more positive light for people who might be critical.) It frustrates me when people try and subtly question whether I'm looking for a full-time position, or worst of all, talk about "getting me a real job." Excuse me, subbing is a real job, and though on paper I'm overqualified for it, in reality my teaching experience is the whole reason I do this job so well. It's that teaching experience that allows me to come into an unfamiliar classroom and actually teach the class, not just oversee them and stop them from murdering each other. And even if I was overqualified, so what? It's my choice to work a job that I enjoy. So I get very sensitive about other people's opinions on that.
I also worry that people are secretly wondering whether I can't get a full-time teaching job for some reason. I do have applications in, and it's true that no offers have been forthcoming, but I also could be campaigning a lot harder for a job in either of the counties where I work, or broadening my application field even further than it already is and not just hedging my bets on few counties. It's the fact that I am content where I am that makes me less motivated to do this. I keep reminding myself that what's important is where I want to go, not what other people's imagined five-year plan is for me. So I can get a full-time job at my own pace, and it shouldn't matter when other people want me to do it. But I do worry about people thinking less of me sometimes.
Anyway, that's the general summary of my work life. In other news, I'm still serving as worship coordinator at my church, and still living with my friend Caitlin. Right now she has been in China for the past week and will be there until Thursday, so it's been just me and the cat for quite a few days. The house feels really different without her there. It's odd, because I'm such a loner that when she's home, we actually spend a lot of time apart; I need a lot of space to myself, and besides, I tend to seclude myself in my room because it's the only way I can be sure to get things done. (Especially since this particular friend's tastes in TV so closely align with my own that I tend to fall in love with practically everything she shows me, so if I spent more time with her, I would end up getting sucked into a TV vortex and I really WOULDN'T get anything done!) So I enjoy having the house to myself, but at the same time, it feels so weird without her that right now I really miss the company. I think that's just a roommate-situation thing; I don't feel weird in an empty apartment when I'm living on my own. It's just different when you're used to someone else being around and they're not. It also probably means I need to get out and hang out with other people more. ;)
At the moment, though, I am in a different place- dog-sitting for a woman who lives nearby (and also happened to be one of my coworkers at the elementary school). She has an adorable Maltese, who is the sweetest. For a little less than a week I'll spend evenings and the earlier part of the mornings with him, and then the rest of the morning and afternoon at my own house. Again, it's funny; though I'm alone in this house right now too, I don't feel as weird as when I'm at my actual house without my roommate. You'd think I'd feel out of place because it's not MY house. Go figure...
I'm very comfy right now. This family lives in a very nice place (when I told my sister who I was dog-sitting for this week, she said, "Oh, the rich-people house?"- and it's true, their house is really nice), and I've enjoyed getting things done. Earlier I ate dinner while the TV was playing an opera, and I felt super classy. :) Now I'm curled up on the couch with a cup of tea and the dog sleeping nearby. I'll have to go to bed soon- it's 11:00 at night!
Before I sign off, here's a photo of me I took this week for a Day in the Life photographic challenge (which I probably won't get submitted in time for the deadline, but may post here for you guys). As you can probably tell from the workout clothes and the pointe shoes in my hand, I was in the middle of practicing dance when I took this photo. Excuse the weird expression on my face, and I'll try not to bore you with my insecurities about how tiny I am. This is just as a reference so you can see what I look like after all this time. :)
I am still truly enjoying being a substitute teacher. I'm considering doing it for one more year while I take classes to renew my teaching certification, and then campaigning more actively for a full-time position. The only thing I don't enjoy about subbing is the reactions I get from other people (acquaintances, mostly) now that I've been doing it for two and a half years. People have started to ask me "what I'm doing these days" and expecting that I'll say I've moved on to a full-time position, and although they are very polite and supportive and don't say this outright, I am still sensing a bit of confusion- or even disappointment- when I tell people that I'm still subbing. (It's part of why I play up how much I enjoy it when I tell people about my job- the enthusiasm isn't disingenuous, but it's my way of putting it in a more positive light for people who might be critical.) It frustrates me when people try and subtly question whether I'm looking for a full-time position, or worst of all, talk about "getting me a real job." Excuse me, subbing is a real job, and though on paper I'm overqualified for it, in reality my teaching experience is the whole reason I do this job so well. It's that teaching experience that allows me to come into an unfamiliar classroom and actually teach the class, not just oversee them and stop them from murdering each other. And even if I was overqualified, so what? It's my choice to work a job that I enjoy. So I get very sensitive about other people's opinions on that.
I also worry that people are secretly wondering whether I can't get a full-time teaching job for some reason. I do have applications in, and it's true that no offers have been forthcoming, but I also could be campaigning a lot harder for a job in either of the counties where I work, or broadening my application field even further than it already is and not just hedging my bets on few counties. It's the fact that I am content where I am that makes me less motivated to do this. I keep reminding myself that what's important is where I want to go, not what other people's imagined five-year plan is for me. So I can get a full-time job at my own pace, and it shouldn't matter when other people want me to do it. But I do worry about people thinking less of me sometimes.
Anyway, that's the general summary of my work life. In other news, I'm still serving as worship coordinator at my church, and still living with my friend Caitlin. Right now she has been in China for the past week and will be there until Thursday, so it's been just me and the cat for quite a few days. The house feels really different without her there. It's odd, because I'm such a loner that when she's home, we actually spend a lot of time apart; I need a lot of space to myself, and besides, I tend to seclude myself in my room because it's the only way I can be sure to get things done. (Especially since this particular friend's tastes in TV so closely align with my own that I tend to fall in love with practically everything she shows me, so if I spent more time with her, I would end up getting sucked into a TV vortex and I really WOULDN'T get anything done!) So I enjoy having the house to myself, but at the same time, it feels so weird without her that right now I really miss the company. I think that's just a roommate-situation thing; I don't feel weird in an empty apartment when I'm living on my own. It's just different when you're used to someone else being around and they're not. It also probably means I need to get out and hang out with other people more. ;)
At the moment, though, I am in a different place- dog-sitting for a woman who lives nearby (and also happened to be one of my coworkers at the elementary school). She has an adorable Maltese, who is the sweetest. For a little less than a week I'll spend evenings and the earlier part of the mornings with him, and then the rest of the morning and afternoon at my own house. Again, it's funny; though I'm alone in this house right now too, I don't feel as weird as when I'm at my actual house without my roommate. You'd think I'd feel out of place because it's not MY house. Go figure...
I'm very comfy right now. This family lives in a very nice place (when I told my sister who I was dog-sitting for this week, she said, "Oh, the rich-people house?"- and it's true, their house is really nice), and I've enjoyed getting things done. Earlier I ate dinner while the TV was playing an opera, and I felt super classy. :) Now I'm curled up on the couch with a cup of tea and the dog sleeping nearby. I'll have to go to bed soon- it's 11:00 at night!
Before I sign off, here's a photo of me I took this week for a Day in the Life photographic challenge (which I probably won't get submitted in time for the deadline, but may post here for you guys). As you can probably tell from the workout clothes and the pointe shoes in my hand, I was in the middle of practicing dance when I took this photo. Excuse the weird expression on my face, and I'll try not to bore you with my insecurities about how tiny I am. This is just as a reference so you can see what I look like after all this time. :)