...mother fucking brianna ebbs
Gah i am so aggravated. i became extremely overwhelmed with looking into colleges and financial aid. So i thought i should bust out Guild Wars and look for a new person to play with. It has been years. But i cant login without my username, password, and name of one of my characters. The latter i forget. i cannot, for the life of me, remember any of my character's names. It is easy to retrieve your password through support, but retrieving character name sis another matter and i am going to at least need the activation code which i am pretty certain to still have. It is just in storage and i am not about to have Leann drive me to Roseville for an activation code. i am also very pissed off that i offended that chick who answered my CL add. She sounded hot. i don't know if she just disliked the picture i sent or if the Pitboss lyrics were offensive or what. It could have been a few things. Fuck. It seems like i am always doing this. Why cant i just keep my humor to myself. Keep things simple. Anyway, that really pissed me off. i felt like i missed a great opportunity. Then again, if i offended her that easily, then a friendship most likely wouldn't have worked. i am very offensive and dry and nobody gets me. Anyway that and possibly preparing for school has really got me down. i am also worried that this whole school thing is me being manic. i haven't been taking my meds properly and this does seem very manic of me. i am unsure if going to school is even a good idea. at all. fuck. i just wish. i don't know. i just wish i had somebody i guess. anybody. its hard to come to terms with the fact that even any friendship with someone probably isn't possible seeing as i never have any money, i don't have the car, and i am way to embarrassed to bring anyone to this filthy house. Anyway, it doesn't look like anything will ever happen because i keep scaring people off. maybe it is just me being awkward. i say this all the fucking time but i really need to learn to shut up. like really. i can see how it is off putting. i remember, as a kid, coming across family members or family friends with a dry sense of humor and what it was like. i can't say it was pleasant. that is probably how grown-ups feel. Anyway this is the interaction that took place:
Her: Hey I seen your ad. I like that you are a vegetarian and that you like emo indie music. I like a lot of that stuff and much much more as well.
I dont feel comftorable sending my pic out and couldnt even if i could but if you send one Ill send you a username from a social network that has 20 or so on it. Im the slightly scene girl type with teased hair and tattoos. Lip and septem pierced with 7/8 hello kitty plugs. I work out every other day religiously so i stay fit. :)
Me: "rock girls are hot, metal girls make me drool Hardcore girls are sexy, but emo girls rule Short spiky hair, and horn-rimmed glasses Sweet emo..." i'm not going to finish that line at the risk of offending you. Scene points if you know who the lyrics are by. But [i] completely agree with it. i have attached a photo of me. i took it just now just for you! i am not photogenic so when people [ask] for a photo, i can only find ones that are usually "out-of-date". i used to have long hair and wear eyeliner a lot and that is kind of what pictures i do have of myself. Anyway, i am going on and on. i have a lip ring (as you will see in the picture). i used to have my eyebrows pierced and i liked it a lot but it wasn't a good idea when choosing dog sitting as your career path. i only have 2 tattoos. i have a straight edge tattoo (dont let that deter you, i get along with everybody, unless you have a problem with drugs or alcohol. i am a fixer. so i will unsuccessful try and fix you and i am really trying to avoid that this time around) i also, don't laugh, have a taking back sunday tattoo. i don't know what else to say. i was going to talk about music but don't want to scare you off. i am kind of a music snob and old school. i worked at hot topic when i was a young adult and it really opened my eyes to what was out there and what is out there. Anyway, i hope you get back to me in spite of my TBS tattoo.
Perhaps she had a drug/alcohol problem? That is a possibility. Maybe i shouldn't bring up drugs or alcohol next time. i should have totally not brought up Pitboss in any way. about 78% of my response was completely unnecessary and that is the flaw. i want to say it is her loss since i am so awesome. but like i said earlier, i am broke, jobless, carless, and living in filth. not sure that is quite appealing to anybody. i probably shouldn't be looking but i am so damn lonely. a hug would be nice. actually, what i could REALLY use right now is a back rub. not a "rub" just a motion of the hand moving against my back. That would be joyous.
Anyway. One day i am going to be educated, have a real career, and be that much more appealing. i don't see myself finding any non-shallow girls anytime soon. It is a rarity. An unfortunate rarity. Anyway, i am going to just wrap this up. i am just in a weird mood. i don't know if i am pissed or frustrated or annoyed or what. i just don't know. what i do know is that it is REALLY nice to be listening to Jack Off Jill right now. i need to upload a song to my tumblr. i think i may bare through the misery it causes me and add tags to all my old posts since 2003.
Her: Hey I seen your ad. I like that you are a vegetarian and that you like emo indie music. I like a lot of that stuff and much much more as well.
I dont feel comftorable sending my pic out and couldnt even if i could but if you send one Ill send you a username from a social network that has 20 or so on it. Im the slightly scene girl type with teased hair and tattoos. Lip and septem pierced with 7/8 hello kitty plugs. I work out every other day religiously so i stay fit. :)
Me: "rock girls are hot, metal girls make me drool Hardcore girls are sexy, but emo girls rule Short spiky hair, and horn-rimmed glasses Sweet emo..." i'm not going to finish that line at the risk of offending you. Scene points if you know who the lyrics are by. But [i] completely agree with it. i have attached a photo of me. i took it just now just for you! i am not photogenic so when people [ask] for a photo, i can only find ones that are usually "out-of-date". i used to have long hair and wear eyeliner a lot and that is kind of what pictures i do have of myself. Anyway, i am going on and on. i have a lip ring (as you will see in the picture). i used to have my eyebrows pierced and i liked it a lot but it wasn't a good idea when choosing dog sitting as your career path. i only have 2 tattoos. i have a straight edge tattoo (dont let that deter you, i get along with everybody, unless you have a problem with drugs or alcohol. i am a fixer. so i will unsuccessful try and fix you and i am really trying to avoid that this time around) i also, don't laugh, have a taking back sunday tattoo. i don't know what else to say. i was going to talk about music but don't want to scare you off. i am kind of a music snob and old school. i worked at hot topic when i was a young adult and it really opened my eyes to what was out there and what is out there. Anyway, i hope you get back to me in spite of my TBS tattoo.
Perhaps she had a drug/alcohol problem? That is a possibility. Maybe i shouldn't bring up drugs or alcohol next time. i should have totally not brought up Pitboss in any way. about 78% of my response was completely unnecessary and that is the flaw. i want to say it is her loss since i am so awesome. but like i said earlier, i am broke, jobless, carless, and living in filth. not sure that is quite appealing to anybody. i probably shouldn't be looking but i am so damn lonely. a hug would be nice. actually, what i could REALLY use right now is a back rub. not a "rub" just a motion of the hand moving against my back. That would be joyous.
Anyway. One day i am going to be educated, have a real career, and be that much more appealing. i don't see myself finding any non-shallow girls anytime soon. It is a rarity. An unfortunate rarity. Anyway, i am going to just wrap this up. i am just in a weird mood. i don't know if i am pissed or frustrated or annoyed or what. i just don't know. what i do know is that it is REALLY nice to be listening to Jack Off Jill right now. i need to upload a song to my tumblr. i think i may bare through the misery it causes me and add tags to all my old posts since 2003.